To the Sibling I Never Had,
It’s been 19 years, stop hiding, its not funny anymore! It’s been 19 years, can you please appear? It’s been 19 years, how have you been? You’ve missed it all. Are you even concerned about me? Or at least curious about my life? Being an only child is a bittersweet - but I wonder what you are like sometimes.
When I saw my friends with their siblings, I would mostly be indifferent. But then there were times, when I thought that having a sibling would be pretty cool. Someone to call back home, when I was so confused because I knew mom and dad would just never understand. I wish you were there to understand, to tell me that it’s totally okay to be sad all day just because your favorite soccer team lost a game.
When I see my friends calling their siblings back home, I smile and wish I had someone to share an inside joke with too. It probably doesn’t help that the two of my closest friends are twins. I wish I had a brother who I could laugh with in the middle of the night, laugh till our stomachs hurt. Someone who understood why I am procrastinating and watching this football game, the night before the physics exam I am so not prepared for. Well nobody would understand that, but you at least would be procrastinating with me, because who are we kidding procrastination is in our genes. It would be so comforting to have someone to just sit with when mom and dad are fighting in the adjacent room.
Someone who would tell me that this too shall pass; and that happiness as well as sadness both are temporary. Someone who I could comprehend that the meal isn’t over when I’m full, it’s over when I hate myself. Someone who taught me that it was okay to agree to disagree, and that conformity is overrated. Someone who taught me the importance of unconditional trust and love, because I would never be able to learn that from my friends. Someone who’d teach me how to carefully pick friends, and that all that glitters is not always gold. Someone who made every attempt to respect my decisions, and told me how important it is to stand up for my decisions. Someone who taught me the significance of comprehending contrasting perspectives and opinions. But like I said, it’s bittersweet.
It’s nice to be the only one Mom and Dad are always concerned about. To never compete for my family’s attention and to always have my own room. Its nice to never worry about sharing my favorite snack. Also, because I spent a lot of time by myself, I've developed a strong imagination. I learnt that it was okay to be lonely, and more importantly I learnt how to be comfortable while I was lonely. Most significantly I became very close to my friends whenever I needed someone to lean on. It sucks that I can’t dwell on it forever, so I have made the most I could while being an only child.
Thank you, for existing/not-existing.
