Dear Procrastination,
I don't feel like I even have to start out by saying "hi" to you because you're just always around. I mean, always. I get it, you're needy, you want to know my whereabouts at all times. I'd be happy to let you know what I'm up to - what assignments are due when and what tests I need to be studying for. But here's the thing: if I let you know what I'm doing, you're going to pop in and surprise me with your presence. We've been together for a long time now, so I'm just going to be completely honest with you: I cannot get stuff done when you and I hang out.
I'm not trying to be mean. I know this sounds like some "get-out-of-my-life" letter, but it's not. I think you're a great individual. You've got a lot going for you, really! You allow me to have a lot of fun and relax. But I can't have fun and relax all the time. Sometimes I have to buckle down and get stuff done. You know what I mean? Like remember that time when we stayed up late playing Fruit Ninja instead of reading Ben Franklin's autobiography? We had so much fun and I think we broke some personal bests! But I really needed to be hanging out with Ben at that time. I got my quality time in with him eventually, but I think he took it pretty personally that I put him lower on my priority list. That's what this all boils down to, I guess: priorities. It's not that I don't like you. I just need to spend more time with some of my higher priorities.
Please don't get mad and go off to try to find someone else to be your best buddy. (Or if you feel you absolutely need to leave me, just please don't tell your new friend that I was the one who sent you. They might not be too happy with me.) We can still have some fun times together. Just not as frequent, okay? This college degree is important to me, and I know you can respect that.
I would close this letter off with a "see you soon!" but that would defeat the whole purpose. So yeah... uh...
Meghan