A Letter To The Girl Who's Finding Herself

A Letter To The Girl Who's Finding Herself

How I Lost Myself In The Process Of Finding Myself.

College is a time for change. It’s a time for finding yourself, who you are, and who you want to be. And most of the ride is just that-finding yourself. And sometimes, that may just take the whole four years to do so. After just one year, I expected to know myself. I expected to know what I stand for, what I believe in, and how I see myself. But this is unrealistic. Here’s my journey.

All throughout my life, I was known as small. Standing just above 5’ 2”, I weighed just 98 pounds all throughout my high school years. I was the designated “tiny” friend. I always got the middle seat in the back of the car and was often told to "eat a burger." I was also known for having long, beautiful blonde hair. When asked what my best feature was, all my friends responded with my golden locks. I was known for its length. I had always had long hair. Even my kindergarten photo showed it off; so long it was cut out of the frame at the bottom. In addition, I was smart. I graduated number 10 out of 160 students in my high school class. I was in three honor societies, over 10 clubs, held many leadership positions, got a 30 on my ACT, and had a 4.47 GPA. I was known for being smart. And lastly, I was the girl with the boyfriend. Starting in December of 2012, we were inseparable, deemed by our friends as “relationship goals,” and even won Homecoming King and Queen.

But then I graduated, and everything changed. It was June, and my boyfriend of two and a half years and I had suddenly split up. Within a few days, my rock had suddenly disappeared. We had planned on attending the same college, and now, I was going into college all alone. I was all for a drastic change, since that’s what had recently happened in my love life. And so it was decided. I chopped a whopping 13 inches off my hair. Just moments before, it had reached the waistband of my jeans. And just seconds after, it didn’t even reach the top of my undershirt. To top things off, I even picked up a nickname that I would go by at school. But it was a fresh start, and it was just what I needed. I felt like a different person.

Then I got to college, and I discovered my dorm’s delicious pepperoni pizza. And fries. And cheesecake. Cheesecake every day? I was in heaven. Why eat anything healthy when there’s a constant supply of all my favorite foods? For the first three days, I ate nothing but the food items above for dinner. And it showed. I gained 5 pounds right off the bat. This may seem like such a small amount, but on my 5’ 2” frame, there was a noticeable change. Clothes that I had had since freshman year of high school suddenly were too tight on me. I was no longer known for being the smallest or having the flattest stomach. To make matters worse, I had quickly gone from a stand-out student in high school to an average student in college. A 4.47 GPA and a 30 ACT were the norm now. I didn’t join many clubs, and I felt like a failure.

I felt like completely changed person.

Within a matter of months, I had gone from being the smart, small girl with the long hair AND a boyfriend, to being the single, average sized, average intelligent girl with the short hair. I was just like any other average person. I didn’t feel special. What made me stand out? I was a whole new me. I had lost myself in the process of finding myself. I had changed so much of what I knew to be familiar in the past couple months that I had nothing to remember my old self by. Nothing of me was permanent. Nothing was familiar. I felt like I didn’t even know myself anymore. And it showed. I was lost.

It took a very blunt wake-up call from one of my best friends from home for me to realize that I wasn’t myself anymore. He had come to visit one weekend, but instead of spending time with him, I spent all my time with my new, glamorous friends as he sit on the sidelines and watched. Needless to say, when he got home he had some not-so-nice words for me, saying that I “wasn’t who I used to be” and “where was the old me?” This made me reevaluate. Why had I lost myself? I had only become single, cut my hair, gained some curves, and changed my name, so why did I think I was so different? I quickly worked to be who I was before. I cut many toxic relationships out of my life. I tried to reconnect with many of my high-school friends to try to get a sense of familiarity and who I was before I had come to college. I talked more to my parents. I focused more heavily on school, having the work ethic of the student I had previously been. I picked up a couple clubs at the semester mark, even gaining a few leadership roles. I slowly but surely saw the old me start to come out again.

I didn’t write this article to seek out attention for putting on a few pounds, or complain about my new haircut, or even criticize my university for not choosing me as an Honors student. I’m not. I’m here, telling you my experience of trying to find myself and how it went awry. I’ll be the first to admit I’m not there yet. I’m still trying to figure everything out. But I’m excited to. I’m happy with the new me. I can’t wait to go home and chop a few inches off my hair and I feel much healthier now after I gained a couple of pounds (plus hello? New clothes!). But I also can’t wait to go home and reunite with all my high school friends and be known by my full name once again. I think the new, college version of yourself should be a happy medium between who you once were, and who you think you should be. Remember your roots. I’m still working on it. But I know I’ll get there. Because that smile you see below is completely genuine, happy, and eagerly awaiting the future.

Cover Image Credit: www.cynthiapasquella.com

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How To Play 'New Girl's' True American Drinking Game

"It's 75% drinking, 20% Candy Land, and the floor is molten lava."

I think it's fair to say that anyone who watches New Girl knows about True American. This crazy, non-sense drinking game which pops up every so often throughout the seasons and first introduced in Season 1 Episode 20.

The game, as described by New Girl character and fan-favorite Schmidt, is 75% drinking game and 20% Candy Land with a floor of molten lava.

The point of the game is for players to navigate through the Candy Land-like spaces to the "castle," which is a table in the center of the room that holds beer "pawns" and the "king" bottle. The first person to reach and sip from the bottle wins.

SEE ALSO: 15 Things "New Girl" Fans Know to Be True

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Here's how to play:

Step #1: Prepare the "castle"

First, set up your "castle." The castle is made up of beer "pawns" and the "king," a bottle filled with the alcohol of your choice.

The bottle should be in the middle of the table, surrounded by four lines of beer pawns. There is no exact number of beers necessary for each line of beer pawns. Choose any amount of beers that seems appropriate for the amount of players.

Step #2: Set up spaces

Set up spaces using pillows, chairs or any other objects players will be able to stand on. Place an equal amount of spaces around the table. You'll want about 5-8 spaces on each side, depending on the size of the room you're playing in.

Only four of these spaces should reach the castle, lining up with the parade of beer "pawns" and allowing players to take a beer pawn from the castle. For example, in the photo above, each of the chairs touch a corner of the table at the end of the line of beer pawns. Therefore, these are two of the four special spaces that allow players to take a beer. Unlike the pillows pictured, which are just regular spaces that the players can use to move around.

Step #3: Pick teams

Teams are optional. To pick teams, all of the players will place a certain number (1-5) of fingers against their forehead on the count of three.

Any players who hold up the same number are a team. Unmatched players can team up as needed or simply pair up with the person standing closest to them.

Step #4: Begin

Begin with a shotgun "tip-off" to determine which player goes first.

The winner of this shotgunning contest will yell, "One, two, three...JFK!" to announce the official beginning of the game. All players will enthusiastically respond, "FDR!" then quickly grab a beer pawn from the castle and run to any space they wish to start at, excluding for the four special spaces that reach the castle.

Step #5: Make moves

The winner of the shotgunning contest has earned the first turn. From then on, the order of turns will move in a clockwise rotation. During each turn, the player will move one space toward the castle and choose to play one of the following mini-games.

Mini-game number one: the player whose turn it is will count to three then all players will place a certain number (1-5) of fingers on their forehead. Any player who selects a number no one else selected can move ONE space.

Mini-game number two: the player whose turn it is will recite the beginning of a famous American quote. The first player to complete the quote can move TWO spaces.

Mini-game number three: the player whose turn it is will name two famous American people, places or things. The first player to identify what the two have in common can move THREE spaces.

For example, say it's your turn. You will move one space then choose one of the three mini-games. You and all of the players will participate in that game, and the winner will move accordingly. After this, your turn is over and it's the next player's turn (in the original clockwise rotation).

Step #6: "Play on, playa."

Continue playing by these rules until one lucky winner reaches the bottle and sips from its royal glass.

The bottle cannot be opened until every last pawn is removed from the castle. Any players who fail to keep at least one beer in hand, who accidentally end up with more than three beers in hand, or who touch the lava are immediately disqualified. Disqualified players can rejoin the game by shotgunning a beer.


You are now able to impress all of your New Girl-loving friends with knowledge of the workings of the epic True American drinking game. Know your limits, drink responsibly and enjoy!

Cover Image Credit: i.amz.mshcdn.com

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The Best Summer Job And Lobster Roll In Connecticut

It's truly the coolest summer job.


I work at a restaurant on the Connecticut Shoreline called Lobster Landing. Lobster landing is located on the water in Clinton, CT. I work every day in the kitchen helping to serve food, take orders, and cook food. Having a summer job can be really boring at times, but not when you work at a place like this because there's always something going on. Deciding to apply and work at Lobster Landing was one of the best decisions I ever made.

Lobster Landing is owned by two amazing people, Enea and Cathie Bacci. The two of them have worked incredibly hard by devoting much of their time and energy into getting their business to be as successful as it is today. They always welcome their customers with a warm smile or even sometimes a big hug. Cathie and Enea make it an unforgettable and happy experience for everyone that comes to their restaurant. Lobster Landing is a home away from home for not only the customers but also for the staff. They have a very small staff of about 13 people who act like a close-knit family.

Lobster Landing is a very simple restaurant. There are only three things on the menu. Lobster Landing is most famous for their Lobster Rolls. Their Lobster Rolls could be considered to be the best in the state of Connecticut. Because I'm a little biased, I would say they're the best in the world. They also offer a sweet Italian sausage with peppers, onions, and a spicy mustard vinaigrette sauce and lastly, they offer all-beef hot dogs with cheese or sauerkraut. They are also BYO (bring your own.) You can bring anything they don't serve including wine, beer, French fries, side salads etc. For side's, they offer coleslaw, bags of potato chips and at the end, they have cups of gelato! I am definitely guilty of eating lots of gelato at work, but don't tell anybody!

So what makes the Lobster roll so amazing? Lobster Landing serves only hot lobster, not cold. They serve their lobster rolls European style, which means they don't have mayo on them. They use fresh lobster meat, steamed and cut that day in their roles. Each roll contains a quarter of a pound of heated lobster meat. After the lobster is put in the roll, fresh lemon is squeezed on it. Then, warm melted butter is poured over the top of the roll. Lobster Landing also offers a gluten-free option for those who need it!

Not only are the Lobster rolls the greatest of all time, the environment and view is also incredible. They have ocean side seating. The upper deck next to their famous building is built over the water. You can sit anywhere at the restaurant and have a beautiful view of Connecticut oceans. The breeze that comes off the water is perfect for a hot summer day. Lobster Landing is built right next to a marina so there's always boats passing by with eager people waving to their wonderful customers.

One of the main attractions of Lobster Landing is the building itself. The building has been here for a very long time and has survived large storms, hurricanes, floods etc. This rustic building is very beautiful and you'll often see people taking pictures of it or in front of it. I've even seen prom pictures, wedding pictures, and special occasion photos being taken in front of the building.

Lobster Landing offers such a nice environment for its employees and it is always so much fun to work there. The customers are always so nice and talkative, and it is always wonderful to see the regulars that are there almost every week! If you haven't tried a lobster roll here, you seriously need to, it's worth it!
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