From a young age, I dreamed of studying abroad during college. At first, there wasn't any depth to my reasoning, the idea just seemed novel. Once I started college, I was fully confident I would study in France during my second or third year. As I prepared for a semester abroad during my sophomore year of undergrad, so many unknowns awaited me. I knew I would change during that semester. I had some ideas about what I would learn during my semester, but the experience of leaving home and living for an extended amount of time abroad taught me many more lessons than I anticipated. Here are just a few.
1. I learned how to budget.
I started my semester abroad with a finite amount in my bank account. Since I was only going to be there for four months, I didn't have any intention of finding a job. This meant only spending and no income, which meant prioritizing. It meant being creative with meals and entertainment. It meant appreciating the free options and student discounts my new town offered.
In order to keep track of my funds, I created a spreadsheet to manage where and how I was spending my money (helpful with foreign currency cash and online/card purchases). Though I have to admit, I was not as faithful to this spreadsheet as I would have liked, I did see results from it. Not surprisingly, when I was consistently updating it, I was much wiser with my money. When I was confident I could handle my money on my own, I found myself throwing it away to too many clothes at H&M and way too many chocolate croissants. I remember this now in my post-college life where I've found useful online apps that can manage the spreadsheet for me, which allows me to know just how much I'm saving each month.
2. I learned sometimes the friendships worth pursuing are the friendships that likely won't last.
Other people who have studied abroad may disagree on this point based on their experiences and based on what their reasons were for studying abroad. I studied abroad hoping to master the French language. In order to do this, I pushed myself to make friends with whom I wouldn't speak English. I pursued a handful of friendships with French students, getting lunch with them weekly or participating in their French Bible studies. Though I could see there wasn't much in common that would maintain these friendships after my time in France, I saw the benefit in pursuing those friendships while I was there.
It would have been much easier to spend my time developing friendships with the other Americans in my study abroad program, and I probably could have made some strong friendships had I done so. But my intentions for the semester were to gain fluency, not lifelong friends. I am thankful for the friendships I did make with my American classmates, but I am more thankful for the growth I experienced from the more difficult friendships I decided to pursue.
3. I gained a better sense of direction.
Being in a new city in a new country tested my internal compass. Every time I went somewhere, it was uncharted territory for me. Navigating buses, trams, trains, and taxis required that I know where I was going. I didn't have a smart phone while I was in France, so I couldn't rely on GPS, and though I certainly spoke enough French to ask for directions, I was often too intimidated to ask for help. So I became familiar with the map of my France, learning the smaller towns in my area, and also the map of my city, memorizing the tram lines so I could take the most efficient route to school or to the train station.
I've seen a large improvement in my instinctual sense of direction since returning to the States. After college, I moved to Milwaukee, and it was a directional challenge again to learn the highways, neighborhoods, and surrounding towns. It's been much easier this time around (granted there isn't a language barrier for me this time..) knowing that I figured out and called home a new city in only four months while I was abroad. This reassured me that it is okay to get lost on the way to dinner because that could just be one more area I wouldn't have otherwise explored.
4. I learned to accept feelings of uncertainty, loneliness and homesickness.
I loved my time abroad, but I had many conversations over video chat with my now-husband just crying. It wasn't because I didn't want to be there, but I also dearly missed being home. I longed to be at my school for tennis season or to be with my family so I could meet my newborn niece. Looking back, four months does not seem like a long time, but I often felt overwhelmed and at first guilty that I wasn't thrilled every day to be living in my dream come true.
Through the counsel of a few people, I learned to accept those feelings. I found other students in my study abroad program were struggling with similar emotions. I realized it was another example of the timeless lesson that fulfillment should not and will not come from outside sources. I learned to be content and to push myself to make the most of my limited time abroad because I knew a year or two down the road, I would be wishing to be back. And here I am, feeling very nostalgic.
