College is about finding yourself. Apparently, every professor got together and decided that the only way for us to do so is if they never allow us to really quite sleep. Like, ever. They bombard us with so many problem sets and pre-labs and grammar quizzes and whatever policy memos are that sooner or later, we all must accept our fate, pack a bag, and surrender ourselves to our dear friend Gelman for the night.
Maybe the professors are on to something. Maybe our “true selves” are hiding under the covers of those things they call “books”. More likely, though, the weekend days were spent reminiscing with Rory & Lorelai on Netflix only for us to come to the realization that there's everything in the world to be done for this week.
Don’t fret just yet. In such times of trouble, turn to these tips and pull off that all-nighter as gracefully as one can.
Caffeinate. This one probably seems obvious. Still, some options are better than others. Instead of downing an espresso shot, or chugging two Red Bulls—which can't be good for you in any situation ever—turn towards iced drinks. Cool beverages, liked iced coffee, will help keep your brain alert and focused. If you’re lucky and not yet addicted to straight caffeine, then try iced tea. Your system won’t be overwhelmed, but the drink will pack just enough punch to last you the night.
Treat Yoself. I’ve read in too many magazines that to study most efficiently on a late night, you need to pack small, healthy, and nutritious snacks: cheese, berries, a handful of almonds. Sorry, but the last time I checked, I was a crazy-stressed human being, not a squirrel. A handful of almonds isn’t getting me anywhere (besides the hospital, but we can put the nut allergy aside….) Point is, you need to pack snacks that will actually motivate you to do work. Crunchy, salty foods like pretzels or Chex Mix will satisfy your appetite so that you don’t find yourself asking Dominos if they deliver to the library. Bring something sweet too, like a few pieces of chocolate or candy, and reward yourself after each page you type or chapter you read.
Unplug. Try every way to convince yourself otherwise, but you don’t need your phone for a library sesh. Obviously, you’ll still bring it. Do yourself a favor and turn it onto airplane mode—no texts, snapchats, or other notifications will pop up on your screen, but you can still listen to your study playlist and check what ungodly hour of the night it is. As for your computer, download SelfControl. This app allows you to enter in the URLs of time-wasting websites like Facebook and Buzzfeed, and set a timer for however long you choose. It then blocks these websites on your computer for the designated time-frame, allowing you to stay focused. It may be a bit brutal, but it works.
Dress for Success. You’re going to feel like crap come the morning, but you don’t have to look like it. Avoid wearing pijamas or sweatpants, because you’re all too likely to get a bit comfortable and risk dozing off in the library. Nobody wants to be that person. Forcing yourself to wear real (but still comfortable) clothes will in turn force yourself to stay productive. Bonus: an actual outfit will transition you straight to class for that 9:35 a.m. deadline. If you’re one of the unfortunate souls who actually has to run straight to class from your all-nighter, then plan ahead with a little overnight kit. Under-eye concealer, dry shampoo, and gum will have you looking and feeling more like an actual person and less like a shriveled Squidward in the morning light.
If all else fails, just remember: nobody comes out of an all-nighter a winner. You're not exceptionally failing at life, no matter how much it may seem so. Yes, you’ll inevitably reach that 3 a.m. point of delirium, but you’ll get through it. With these tricks up your sleeve, you’re likely to get through it a lot less painfully.
P.S. In the spirit of this article, I may or may not have written this at 3 a.m.... If it weren't for spell-check, the answer would be obvious.
