I have been approached by multiple people that say things like, "It must have been so hard for you to grow up with two disabled brothers! You poor thing!" The truth is, yes it was hard. But it is also probably the best situation that God could have placed me in because he certainly knew what he was doing. For those who still wonder what it must have been like to grow up with two brothers with special needs, here you go.

Hard

Having two brothers with special needs certainly wasn't easy. I was forced to mature a bit earlier than most people because I had to step up to the plate to take care of them. I had to understand that my parents could spend as much time with me one on one because my brothers needed so much attention. However, the hardest part was feeling useless. There is nothing worse than watching your brother who is three years older than you break down in tears because he cannot express to you what he wants. Or taking your little brother out to get ice cream and he ends up breaking down in tears in the middle of the store because another little boy was crying. My little brother has so much compassion for other people, and he doesn't know how to express that without showing what they are feeling. When meltdowns start, there is little that can be done to stop them sometimes. They just need to run their course, and the best thing to do is give them space, but that is also one of the hardest things to do. Standing and watching these meltdowns unfold before my eyes and all I want to do is reach out and help but know that there is nothing I can do to ease the pain was the worst kind of emotional roller coaster I had to endure.

Humbling

Let me paint a quick picture for you. You are sitting in your room, and you haven't had breakfast yet are you are really starting to get hungry so you think, "Oh, I will just go get something to eat." But then you look down, and you're in a wheelchair, unable to walk yourself over to the kitchen. Your mom comes in and asks what you want. You open your mouth to say words and nothing but sounds come out. That is what it's like for people who are wheelchair bound and nonverbal. Growing up with my brothers has taught me to appreciate the little things in life, like being able to communicate what I need and even being able to get it for myself. It's easy to forget what a luxury those kind of things are when it comes so naturally.

Rewarding

The lessons that I have learned throughout the years living at home far exceed anything that I could learn from any book. I have such a passion for children with special needs because of the amazing things I have seen through my brothers. I work with special needs students the entire year, and I love every second of it. They are truly the joys of my life, and I love them and know how to love them because of my brothers. There are no words or actions that I will ever be able to give them to express the gratitude for everything they have given me.

Learning Experience

I have learned so many things from my brothers. Far more than I could ever teach them. They have taught me how to love in a different way. In a way, that is purer than what I would feel for anyone else. I have learned to love them because of what they have, not because I feel bad for what they don't have. They have such a joy that seeps out of them every day. They are some of the happiest people I know and being around them is a breath of fresh air. The things they can do and who they far exceed any expectations I ever had for them. They surprise me every day with the love they have for life and people. Their definition of love may be different than mine, but it is not any less pure. It is not any less meaningful. They have truly shown me what it is like to have a different kind of love that lasts a lifetime.