Kindness And Honesty Can Coexist

Kindness And Honesty Can Coexist

It isn't difficult to choose both if you stop and think before you speak.
438
views

We live in a world where we are constantly asking and answering questions. We want to know when to meet, what people think of the characters of the new series on Netflix, if we should wear the dress or go as is. These questions require answers, and while a yes or no may suffice in some cases, more thought goes into that yes or no than you may think.

Being honest is really hard sometimes. You don't want to hurt the feelings of people who are important to you, but you also don't want to feed them lies because it makes you feel guilty. You want everyone to be happy.

Say your friend asks you if you like the dress she tried on. If you are honest, you tell them yes or no, maybe you sugar coat it. What do you do if it's the worst dress to have ever ended up in stores and you can't believe they chose it? You say...what? Do you tell them that the dress will sit in their closet and never see the light of day? Maybe you tell them it isn't your style but they can pull it off? Perhaps even tell them that it doesn't flatter them in any way. Which situation is going to lead to a positive outcome where you don't lie to yourself or them? Honesty is important in any relationship, but there is a classy way to go about it.

If you're unsure as to how to go about it, think about what you would want someone to tell you in that situation. Do you want to know if there is something in your teeth? If your hair looks okay? Yeah? Well I'm sure your friend would want to know too and would appreciate you telling them without alerting the whole party.

What do you do at work if there is a task that your boss asks you to do and you don't have time? Do you tell them no? Yes? I will get to it when I can? You may not want to do it but it is a part of the job so you have to. It may be something extra but it will help your career so you take it on. Maybe they really were just too busy and needed help. You can ask questions about it. Make sure you aren't overloading yourself as you try to get through your usual workload.

With family it can be easy to be honest with some people, but not all with others. If your grandma gives you a hand knit sweater and wants you to wear it the rest of the day, there isn`t really a way to scratch your way out of that one.

Personally being honest with my immediate family is easier than being honest with grandparents or other relatives. With them, I know they may be disappointed I didn't like it, but they are glad they aren't paying money for something to sit around all day and collect dust.

With grandparents, they put time and effort into picking out something for you, or maybe they even made it. In that case you just have to accept that they love you and the itchy material doesn't have to be worn 24/7.

With yourself honesty can be hard too. There are times when you know something but choose to ignore the facts. There are others where you tell yourself not to get something because yes, it does look like you're wearing clown shoes when you put those on.

Honesty - true, kind honesty - is hard to come by these days. Sometimes it is best to be blunt. Other times you need to think about the other person and not grind their self esteem to dust. Each situation is different and requires a different tone, a different approach, and we all need to be aware of that.


Cover Image Credit: Texas Music Pickers

Popular Right Now

The Thank You My Dad Deserves

While our moms are always the heroes, our dads deserve some credit, too.
181921
views

Dear Dad,

You’ve gone a really long time without being thanked. I'm not talking about thanks for things like opening the Gatorade bottle I couldn't or checking my tires when my car’s maintenance light is flashing, but rather the thanks I owe you for shaping me into the person I am today.

Thank you for teaching me what I deserve and for not letting me settle for anything less.

While the whole world was telling me I wasn’t good enough, you were there to tell me I was. Whether this was with boys, a friend, or anything else, you always built my confidence to a place I couldn’t build it to on my own. You showed me what my great qualities were and helped me feel unique. But most of all, you never let me settle for anything less than what I deserved, even when I wanted to. Without you, I wouldn’t be nearly as ambitious, outgoing or strong.

Thank you for giving me someone to make proud.

It’s hard to work hard when it’s just for myself, but so easy when it’s for you. All through school, nothing made me happier than getting a good grade back because I knew I got to come home and tell you. With everything I do, you give me a purpose.

SEE ALSO: 20 Things You Say When Calling Your Dad On The Phone

Thank you for showing me what selflessness looks like.

You are the prime example of what putting your family first looks like. If me wanting something means that you can’t get what you want, you’ll always sacrifice. From wearing the same t-shirts you’ve had since I was in elementary school so I could buy the new clothes I wanted, to not going out with your friends so you could come to my shows, you never made a decision without your family at the forefront of your mind. If there is one quality you have that I look up to you for the most, it’s your ability to completely put your needs aside and focus entirely on the wants of others.

Thank you for being the voice in the back of my head that shows me wrong from right.

Even though many of your dad-isms like “always wear a seatbelt” easily get old, whenever I’m in a situation and can’t decide if what I’m doing is right or wrong, I always can hear you in the back of my head pointing me in the right direction. While I may not boost your ego often enough by telling you you’re always right, you are.

Thank you for being real with me when nobody else will.

Being your child hasn’t always been full of happiness and encouragement, but that’s what makes you such an integral part of my life. Rather than sugarcoating things and always telling me I was the perfect child, you called me out when I was wrong. But what separates you from other dads is that instead of just knocking me down, you helped me improve. You helped me figure out my faults and stood by me every step of the way as I worked to fix them.

Most of all, thank you for showing me what a great man looks like.

I know that marriage may seem very far down the road, but I just want you to know that whoever the guy I marry is, I know he’ll be right because I have an amazing guy to compare him to. I know you’re not perfect (nobody is), but you’ve raised me in a such a way that I couldn’t imagine my kids being raised any differently. Finding a guy with your heart, drive, and generosity will be tough, but I know it will be worth it.


Dad, you’re more than just my parent, but my best friend. You’re there for me like nobody else is and I couldn’t imagine being where I am now without you.

Love you forever,

Your little girl

Cover Image Credit: Caity Callan

Related Content

Connect with a generation
of new voices.

We are students, thinkers, influencers, and communities sharing our ideas with the world. Join our platform to create and discover content that actually matters to you.

Learn more Start Creating

10 Inspiring Quotes To Keep You Motivated During Your Post-Midterm Slump

Why stop just because midterms ended?

113
views

During midterms week, people always post pictures of quotes on Instagram or post quotes on Facebook, Twitter, or other social media platforms. Everyone is constantly wishing everyone good luck and telling them that they will do great. It's funny to think it all just stops the second testing ends. We should strive to be motivated all the time and in all aspects of our life, not just school and midterms/finals. We should also push our friends and encourage them to strive to do their best in everything they do. It should not take testing for everyone to want others to do well.

1. "Do it for you, not them."

Do well and succeed and make yourself happy and proud. That is all that matters.

2. "Be happy in the moment, that's enough. Each moment is all we need, not more." - Mother Teresa

Why waste time being anything other than happy?

3. "Wherever you are, be all there." - Jim Elliot

Give 100% in all you do, all of the time.

4. "Believe in yourself, and you will be unstoppable."

You are in charge of yourself and no one else. All you need is you.

5. "Be the CEO your parents wanted you to marry."

People are often told to marry someone well off, but why do that when you are capable of striving and succeeding yourself? Do not wait for someone to do it for you. Dream big, work hard and empower yourself.

6. "I didn't get there by wishing for it or hoping for it, but by working for it." - Estée Lauder

Work hard for what you want even if it doesn't come easy and has obstacles. Let nothing stop you.

7. "A man can be as great as he wants to be. If you believe in yourself and have the courage, the determination, the dedication, the competitive drive and if you are willing to sacrifice the little things in life and pay the price for the things that are worthwhile, it can be done." - Vince Lombardi

Goals can take sacrifices. Are you willing to make them?

8. "You are braver than you believe, stronger than you seem and smarter than you think." - Christopher Robin

Sometimes a good childhood movie can remind us that we are capable.

9. "Stop being afraid of what could go wrong and think of what could go right."

Take risks. You never know what could come out of a situation.

10. "You Are Never Too Old To Set Another Goal Or To Dream A New Dream." - C.S. Lewis

Age does not matter. It is never too late.

Related Content

Facebook Comments