Johnny Cash was known for a lot of things: being probably one of the most influential musicians of the 20th century, his inability to sing like a regular human being, his affinity for wearing black and also, strikingly, a Nine Inch Nails cover.

Yes, that’s right, one of the most hauntingly beautiful songs I have ever heard -- after "Hallelujah," of course -- is a cover. But, much like "Hallelujah," sometimes a cover is infinitely better. (Rest in Peace, Jeff Buckley.) However, with a cover comes change. Perhaps the meaning itself changes. While the original was more clearly inspired by heroin, maybe Cash’s version was about a different drug of choice, maybe Novocain?

That’s right, I’m here this week to tell you that “Hurt” Is actually about going to the dentist. This may sound absolutely implausible, but I do have some solid justifications why.

Later in his life, Johnny Cash was really suffering. He’d had heart surgery, diabetes and its associated eyesight failure, been misdiagnosed with an incurable disease and after battling with drug addiction for decades, had eventually come out on top. On top of all that, he’d also had an unhappy visit to the dentist where the doctor had broken his jaw, and had allowed it to heal incorrectly. Cash was given two options: either have the surgery to correct it, which might end his singing career, or take medication, which would undermine his victory with drug dependency. Ultimately, Cash chose not to take either option, and instead made the hard decision to suffer the pain to keep singing.

Therefore, it isn’t exactly a stretch to say that Cash would have had some serious issues with discomfort.

So. Here’s my explication of “Hurt,” line by line:

“I hurt myself today / To see if I still feel.” Most of us have had cavities, and if not, we’ve all definitely had bruises. I know that I’ve found myself on more than one occasion poking at a bruise and wondering how it got there. Even though it hurt, I still kept touching it. The Internet says it’s because of an endorphin response, but I think it’s because I’m frequently bored. Sometimes, I’ll catch myself checking to see if a tooth still aches if I press firmly on it or eat sweets, which, of course it does.

“I focus on the pain/ The only thing that’s real.” This line really strikes a chord with me, as due to a lack of decent insurance, I haven’t seen a dental hygienist in years, unless they were telling me their order at the deli. Sometimes, especially with chocolate, I’ll take a bite of candy and then suddenly, my mouth is its own little world of pain. One might even say it’s the only real thing to me at the moment. I’ve had more than a few toothaches, especially with my wisdom teeth coming in, that seem like all I can focus on is my intense discomfort.

“The needle tears a hole / The old familiar sting.” This bit refers to, quite clearly, injection. As stated previously, when one goes to the dentist, they generally don’t just immediately begin by drilling away at your cavities. Generally, they have Novocain available, but I guess that could depend on how great your dental plan is. Johnny Cash was, again, a drug addict, so the sting of a needle wouldn’t exactly be unfamiliar to him.

“I try to kill it all away / But I remember everything.” Going to the dentist isn’t exactly the most pleasurable of experiences. When I was a kid (and currently) I was terrified of going to the dentist, but thinking about how much it hurt when I got a gummy bear or a Milk Dud stuck in a cavity… it hurts just remembering the feeling now and it makes me tempted to pick up the phone and dial that sketchy free clinic near my school. What’s even worse is that I am terrified of needles. Even though I know it’s going to help me, I’m still squeamish. Even though I know it’s going to “kill the pain,” my mother had to come in to hold my hand… and occasionally hold me down.


“What have I become / My sweetest friend?” I feel that this line refers specifically to Cash’s teeth. What have they become? Full of holes! I’ve gone to public grade schools all of my life, and I have seen some truly unpleasant sets of not-so pearly whites, most likely due to a mix of poor dental hygiene and an affinity for sweet, sweet chocolate. As a young adult who has suffered from heartbreak -- chocolate, at the time, was indeed my “sweetest friend.” Cash was probably binge eating cake in a bush somewhere, complaining to his only current friend (the cake) that all his friends leave him “in the end,” which is what the two next lines were referring to.


Now, if we think of the four lines after that:
“You could have it all / My empire of dirt / I will let you down / I will make you hurt.” As a kind of conversation between Cash and his dentist, it sounds like Cash is pleading for his doctor to take the pain away, offering him everything, “all” of it, including his empire of dirt, which is what remains after everything has presumably already been taken away. In reply, the doctor issues a warning that this procedure is going to be painful and in the end, in Cash’s case, it will just add more problems.

“I wear this crown of thorns / Upon my liar's chair.” These lines were tricky to interpret, but I did my best. As previously mentioned, Cash’s jaw was broken and failed to heal properly, causing him great pain. As his dental records aren’t public, and therefore up to speculation, the dentist probably put him in some headgear, which was very uncomfortable due to his unwillingness to use drugs again after kicking the habit. Doctors are notorious white-liars. I remember very unkindly a “This won’t hurt a bit” hurting a LOT. I doubt much has changed in the last fifty years.

“Full of broken thoughts / I cannot repair.” This line was also a little awkward to fit into my theory, and they definitely aren’t the last to need some adjusting, but let’s just say that “thoughts” were a euphemism for teeth, shall we? The next line makes more sense in that context. The dude probably had some janky teeth.

“Beneath the stains of time / The feelings disappear.” Cash smoked, but so did everyone when he was popular, which would be the 60’s to the mind-bogglingly-distant-future. (In my opinion, the day Cash is unpopular is the day the day our sun implodes.) Anyway, as we all know now, smoking leads to some serious damage. Not only your lungs, but your teeth, as well. The feeling disappearing? Well, the Novocain or laughing gas is probably finally kicking in.

“You are someone else / I am still right here.” This might be phoning it in, but I’d say that this line is referring to whatever the heck they used to knock people out in the last few decades. Ether, opium, a rock to the head -- well, that last one might be a little barbaric, but I’ve seen plenty of videos of loopy adults after having their wisdom teeth out and I’m sure that times haven’t changed too much. I’d imagine that Cash would have been more than a little trippy while he was in the dentist’s and it wouldn’t be out of line to say that he might not have recognized the person that was currently drilling him.

The chorus repeats again, so there isn’t really a need to go over it. However, here is an interesting tidbit at the end: “If I could start again / A million miles away / I would keep myself / I would find a way.”
Hopefully, I haven’t exhausted my audience by now, so you’re still reading along. Good. These lines refer to Cash coming home and really feeling and remembering all that pain he went through for the sake of sweet, delicious cake. These are his regrets, and he weeps a bitter tear, knowing that this all could have been avoided if he had kept himself to a stricter diet and if he could go back again and redo everything, he’d find a way to keep away.

(The answer to the title is “Tooth-hurty.” (2:30))