Last week, my professor sat at the front of our class to take roll and decided to also read aloud each student’s major(s) and minor(s). I don’t know why she did this, especially since we’d covered all of this information the first week of classes with an uncomfortable ice-breaker. I also do not know why she felt the need to comment on each person’s chosen major, but she did, offering praises to those who were double-majoring and/or double-minoring because they were “definitely Truman students” (she repeated a version of this comment at least 14 times and laughed after each one).
When she got to my name, I was expecting more of the same: an offhand comment related to my major and a praise of my double minors, “You’re definitely a Truman student!” and I’d think, “Yeah, weird right? It’s almost like I’ve been paying tuition to attend this college for four years or something.” But this did not happen.
Instead, she read out my major and then stopped. She said, “Wow, an English major. Thank goodness there’s someone in this class who’s not afraid to be brave.” Except her comment wasn’t actually genuine admiration, it was sarcasm. She was laughing as she said it, as though the prospect of getting an undergrad English degree was so foolish she couldn’t contain herself. When she said brave, she meant stupid.
She didn’t stop there, either. She just couldn’t stop herself from saying the one thing I have consistently heard since declaring my major four years ago: “You know it’s going to be impossible to get a job with an English major, right?”
Tight-lipped and willing myself to not just get up and walk out of the classroom, I responded. “Right. Thanks.” And she finally moved on.
During the rest of roll, she didn’t make these kinds of comments to anyone else. I promise — I listened for them. Instead, there was more praise, more jokes. It was honestly humiliating. I spent the rest of the class period wondering what it was about my major that made her say those things (and what made so many others say the same). Coming from a professor, I would never have expected such a response. Surely having spent her life dedicated to the education of others, she would have the sense to not belittle my own. But, no. More of the same kinds of nonsense I hear from everyone else who has never bothered to consider me (or any other English major) having any possible worth outside of the degree.
I don’t know when it became the norm to joke about the lack of a future that comes from getting an English degree. I don’t know when it became useless, foolish, or a waste of time. I don’t know when an English degree meant you were going to have to be a teacher because, well, what else could you possibly be?
I also don’t know when it became the norm to reduce someone entirely to their degree. I don’t know why people think that they know you the instant you mention your major. It’s a weird thing, really, people assuming you’re stupid and screwed for graduating with an English degree. Because it honestly shows how little they know about you, how little they understand about the world itself.
Why does my degree automatically mean I can’t get a job? Is an English degree code for “incompetence”? Because I take offense to that kind of thinking. I know I’m capable, I know I’m competent, so why does my degree suddenly seem to tell everyone that I must not be? Does it mean that I haven’t worked as hard as anyone else? Does it mean that I don’t deserve it as much as anyone else? Did I not earn it like everyone else?
And what about my choice of major seems to make anyone think that they can tell me about myself, about my future? What about my degree makes them assume they know me better than myself and that they know something I must not know? I’m not stupid, I promise. I know the stereotypes surrounding my major. I know people don’t always regard it in the same vein as STEM degrees. But I also know that I have a lot to offer the world, regardless of my major. I know I have talents that other people don’t, and I don’t know why those talents seem to be valued less than others.
The world is a strange place, often difficult to manage and understand without the help of organizing things into concrete categories, but even I have trouble grasping why my degree seems to define me as a person so much. Half the time when people comment something snide and derisive about my major, they don’t actually know me. But as soon as they find out my major, they believe they know enough.
At this point, I’ve heard it all too often to actually get myself all insecure and upset. When someone decides to make a snarky remark, it actually just shows me the kind of person that they are: someone who is quick to judge, quick to assume and someone I don’t want in my life.
There’s more to me than a major. There’s more to all of us than that. We all have worth, so shut up about my English degree.