Last spring, I took a class that focused on spreading the Gospel. While the course held a great deal of potential, much of it was focused on sharing it with strangers, primarily overseas; the emphasis was put on approaching strangers and sharing the Word with them. While everyone needs to hear the Gospel, and street ministry can certainly be effective, I couldn’t help but notice that this approach glorifies extroversion. This was not an approach unique to this course, either.
Throughout evangelical Christianity, there is this underlying belief that the best, most obedient Christians are those who get out of their comfort zones and get miraculous stories of homeless alcoholics accepting Christ and turning their lives around. Generally, extroverts are the most willing to extend themselves in this way, either because their comfort zone already includes reaching out to strangers, or it isn’t far out of reach. But introverts often communicate and express themselves differently, and pressuring them into this form of evangelism makes it forced and false.
Susan Cain addresses this "extrovert ideal" and contemporary evangelical churches in her book, Quiet:
“Contemporary evangelicalism says that every person you fail to meet and proselytize is another soul you might have saved."
This idea can plant a seed of doubt into the mind of an introvert, or even a more reserved extrovert: if you are not going out to share the Gospel regularly, or you’re not even comfortable with that thought, are you really a Christian?
Going into just about any contemporary evangelical church, a similar attitude of extroversion exists. The extroverted ideal is everywhere you look: the worship is boisterous and loud; people are bustling and socializing everywhere they can; there are “small” groups – which are often anything but small – for everything and everyone; a community event is held every other week for outreach. These are not negative traits by any means, but it is easy to see how it could be draining and daunting for one who does not thrive or feels overwhelmed in large social situations.
With so much going on in churches, Evangelical Christianity has taken on extreme extroversion as an indicator for virtue and righteousness. If you aren’t telling every single person on the street about Jesus, or belting out the worship songs with your hands in the air on Sunday morning, can you really be devoted to the Lord? Cain describes how this loud embodiment churches hold presents the quiet members with a dilemma:
“If you don’t love Jesus out loud, then it must not be real love. It’s not enough to forge your own spiritual connection to the divine; it must be displayed publicly.”
Evangelism, the spreading of the Gospel, has taken on this attitude of expressing Jesus loudly. As evangelism is focused on reaching as many people as possible, this attitude has brought about the expectation – being as loud as possible to get as much attention as possible. These efforts are not bad. In fact, they are what we need to be doing to reach the unreached, as they are effective - when the people on the giving and receiving ends are extroverted and receptive to this social approach. But what about the introverts?
Our closed and loud mindset isolates introverts, and less forthright extroverts. It pushes the more reserved within the church even further back; faking a smile, forcing boisterous worship and feeling pressured to give more social energy than really available all leave introverts drained and exhausted. Church ought to be a place for connection, growth, challenge and restoration – not further fatigue. Not only does this blatant glorification of extroversion harm those already within the church, but it also harms those we are trying to evangelize to. A typical introvert will not likely respond greatly to street ministry or community outreach events, as their personalities prefer a more personal, intimate and understanding approach. Catering to the extroverted culture and expectation around us leaves introverts behind.
As a church, literally and figuratively, we need to consider the introvert. We need to consider how to validate and understand those who are being drowned out by the noise in our worship centers. We need to reach those who are receiving the invitations to the church’s annual community barbecue, but would much rather stay inside reading a book. We need to put away the extroverted assumptions and truly consider people as people, not just numbers to add to attendance or our personal banks of people we have helped bring to Christ.
Make small groups actually small, giving introverts the intimate relationships and conversations they crave.
Teach the congregation to evangelize to those they already know, not just strangers, to use the relationships they already have to make the other person more receptive.
Host smaller, more intimate events with personal invitations from the church staff or members to reach those who are not receptive to large gatherings.
Introverts are not bad. They are not wrong. They are created in God’s image just as much as extroverts, and it’s time to stop acting like introversion is something to be avoided within the church. Evangelical churches want to spread the Gospel, but extroverts are not the only ones who need it. To reach the unreached, to love one another in the body of Christ, we have to be willing to understand them and do what is necessary to reach them.
