I've been seeing a lot of articles around the internet lately that say how "intentions don't really matter, only your actions do", and I 100% agree with the second part of the statement saying that one's actions matter. There should be consequences for people's actions and that is something that should not be ignored. The first part of that saying that intentions don't matter still has a lot of flaws that people tend to not see most of the time because they just want to take the easy way out and say that someone is a bad person just because of their actions alone. I want people to know that there is a difference.
Many people tend to not realize that genuinely bad people CHOOSE to do what they do. They choose to hurt others and that makes them genuinely horrible people. Someone who is genuinely horrible on the inside would have an entire goal based around hurting other people because it makes them feel stronger. Hurting others makes them feel stronger because when they see someone else hurt, it makes them feel better about their own lives since their lives were not that great, to begin with.
With this in mind, that does not mean that there should not be consequences for people's actions. Consequences would make people learn from their mistakes and make them careful not to repeat them again. However, when people say "I didn't mean to do that" and it happens again, that should be a sign that they DID mean to do it and their intentions were to hurt you. I am a firm believer of second chances, but third and fourth chances are something that I am becoming more and more iffy about as I get older and gain more life experience.
All I really wish is that more people listened to others when they apologize. I know that there are many people out there that do not forgive easily, but a refusal to listen to others is a big turn off for me when it comes to making friends. Anyone who knows me knows that I do not have the heart to hurt anyone, and if I do hurt anyone it is always unintentional and I always try to learn from it. It's just those who do not listen to me when I try to apologize and explain that I know what I did was wrong and it won't happen again that bugs me the most.
What I'm trying to say is listen to others when they are apologizing to you. They might be trying to tell you that they really do want to make amends and that they are willing to learn from their mistakes. A genuinely good person will show you that they learned from their mistakes and more people should take that into account. Shoving someone to the side who did a bad thing but is willing to learn won't necessarily make them learn, but rather would make the other look bad in the end.
