Inner Monologue Of Guy Eating Skyline Chili Afterwork
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Inner Monologue Of Guy Eating Skyline Chili Afterwork

It ain't always pretty, but it's real.

Inner Monologue Of Guy Eating Skyline Chili Afterwork

3:30pm - Getting to cut out early on Friday. This must be what a happy adult feels like.

3:32pm - That “Best Fast Food” conversation at work today just made me hungry. Oh my god, I haven’t eaten since last night. I should eat now if I want to drink tonight.

3:33pm - I should eat regardless if I want to drink tonight or not, god dude what is wrong with you.

3:35pm - I had a burger last night…I’m not trying to spend a lot of money…What haven’t I had in a long time?

3:36pm - Okay yeah let’s do it it’s been too long we’re getting Skyline.

3:37pm - They just opened up that new one by campus gotta check it out.

3:38pm - I’m going take the scenic route there 315 is going be a parking lot.

3:45pm - I should have taken the interstate these lights are ridicules I’m not even through downtown.

3:46pm - When was the last time I had Skyline? Spring break of sophomore year with Drew…holy shit that was a long time ago.

3:47pm - What’s that Florida resident doing these days let’s check the snapchat.

3:48pm - Oh shit Lauren is down there?!

3:49pm - Everyone’s making moves these days, that’s awesome…and I’m on my way to eat skyline…alone…on a Friday…All winners here really.

3:53pm - Is that a Lacrosse game going on at campus right now…bunch of Jimbo’s. I got Gould’s spoon in the back of the jeep I should go out there and school those punks.

3:54pm - Damn I have a lax stick in the back of a Jeep Grand Cherokee right now how basic am I?

3:56pm - Finally here…do I just bite the bullet and go inside or drive through it? It’s better quality inside, and I get the oyster cracker hot sauce combo inside…oyster cracker and hot sauce who thought of that? That combo is straight up fire…stop talking like this you’re too lame to say that.

3:57pm - Screw it I’m going inside, hopefully, there is a bar to sit at.

3:58pm - Okay more people here than I thought…Hope I don’t lose my boss any votes by wearing a t-shirt with his name on it at a Skyline Chili by myself during the middle of the day.

3:59pm - Alright what do I want…gotta go classic three-way right? No frills…”Yeah I’ll take the Five Way”….Why Did I say that? my brain did not sign off on those two extra ways.

4:00pm - No oyster crackers out, why did I even come inside and subject myself to this embarrassment…expect a strongly written yelp review Skyline.

4:01pm - “Here’s some crackers man.”

“Thanks, man I appreciate that”….I say appreciate that too much…like it has no value to me anymore…what don’t I appreciate?

4:02pm - Sweet…I can see the guy making my five way…Not sure if this is a positive or a negative to the dining experience but is definitely an experience none the less

4:03pm - “Here you go man, enjoy” You bet I will

4:04pm - I’m going cut it into little triangles instead of swirling the fork cause I’m a local I know how to properly eat this mess.

4:06pm - I can’t believe it’s been close to 2 years since I’ve eaten here…I’ve never not enjoyed it…now that there is one so close I’ll visit more often.

4:08pm - Ought to send a pic of this to the Pardon My Take guys…I’d fit in with that crew…solid crew…not sure why they rag on skyline so much though this is going down smooth…maybe because I’m basically a local…it is just in my blood to want and handle this stuff.

4:10pm - What we got on the TV here…Golf Channel nice.

4:12pm - Oh wow some cute girls just walked in…They gotta be from Cincinnati right? Why else would they be here? What cute girls can’t eat skyline? You have an older sister, you know gender stereotypes are misplaced, its 2016 get it together man.

4:15pm - Oh no….it’s starting to hit me. I should have pre-tummed…I have to start carrying antacids around…you aren’t a kid anymore you can’t eat with reckless abandonment.

4:16pm - Here, more crackers without hot sauce that’s a thing right? That’s why they are on the table…so I don't die inside...”Everything going alight man.”

“Yeah splendid boss, Thanks,”

4:17pm - You just said splendid and boss in the same sentence what is wrong with you.

4:19pm - Alright we have to power through here. Your babysitter didn’t make chili spaghetti for you all those times growing up for you to quit like this

4:23pm - God I hope no one saw me bring the plate up to my face…that was disgusting.

4:24pm - I can’t believe I use to eat one of those then order 2 coneys to go on the way out the door…youth is wasted on the young.

4:25pm - Alright let’s cash out here…Damn this is a cheap meal….do I tip…I sat at the bar, and there is a drive-through, would I tip on the drive through…whatever I’ll tip because he’s legit watching me hover over this single digit tab likes it’s life or death for me.

4:26pm - Am I going to be able to drive home? Like I feel rough as hell right now. –looks to the car parked next to me and sees guy eating coney dogs in his car by himself- Jesus guy at least go inside and have some respect for yourself.

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