I was recently browsing in Ulta the other day, not looking for anything in particular, but pretending to so an employee would demo the products on me for free.

I was approached by a blond woman who explained how my current foundation just didn’t provide enough coverage. She asked if it was a generic brand and laughed since it was. She matched my skin-tone while making small conversation.

She blended the new product, telling me all about the benefits and how flawless it looked on my skin. She handed me a mirror and gushed about how this makeup matched me perfectly, and it did, but I was sure that it was way more expensive than my drug-store brand.

I dreaded asking her “how much?” since I knew it was more than I usually spend on makeup, but I couldn’t get over how good my skin looked.

I laughed and said “Wow, $35 dollars? It’s tough when you’re ugly—gotta get the good stuff I guess.”

She frowned. “That’s not what makeup is for. I mean yeah sure, maybe some days it’s to cover a little spot, but it isn’t just about that. Makeup is about enhancing your features, not hiding what you have or trying to paint on what you don’t. You’re beautiful and this makeup only makes that come out more!”

I guess that kind of stuck with me because I never thought about it that way. I always used makeup to disguise things I didn’t like, not to complement already present features. I feel like there’s this weird stigma out right now that makeup is this concealer of the “real” you. It’s a part of this fake persona and warps the way that someone looks to almost unrecognizable. People either wear too much or not enough; there’s never a happy medium for critics.

I’ll admit that I am guilty of a past of cake-face. I used to pile makeup on, stifle my skin and put on an outward persona of confidence, even if it wasn’t what I actually looked or felt like; rarely was I truly happy with myself. Besides the fact that I had no idea how to apply my makeup, it also wasn’t flattering since it merely diminished my features. My eyelashes were stubby, dark and clumpy from the five coats of mascara I slathered on. This Ulta employee unknowingly changed my life simply by being friendly and passionate about her work. To be honest, if she hadn’t given me that slight confidence boost that day, I’d probably still be wearing a thick coat of foundation, two shades too dark.

For many people, makeup is an outlet for creative expression, but I think people wear makeup for themselves more than for others. It’s a tool that provides confidence not just in the way that they look, but also the way that they feel about themselves. Since this encounter, I’ve been looking at makeup, my skin and physical perception of myself overall very differently. I also drastically changed the way I approach and do my makeup, now realizing that should I wear makeup, my goal is to enhance, not cover up. I’ve truly started loving myself, with or without makeup.

The purpose of this article is not to encourage minimalism, nor is it meant to deter you from smoky-eye and clown-contouring. The point is that you should wear the makeup that you feel brings out your best features and makes you feel the most confident. As long as you’re doing it for yourself, it shouldn’t really matter what anybody else thinks or says.