I'm Scared To Graduate
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I'm Scared To Graduate

What if I'm not ready?

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I'm Scared To Graduate
Huffington Post

My years in college have made me think about one thing, I cannot wait to graduate and have a degree in something I absolutely love. Here I am, a month away from crossing that stage and being rewarded with a Bachelor's degree, and I am terrified. I'm not ready. Sure, content wise, I can tell you every single thing about my degree. What I cannot tell you is exactly what job I have lined up for me after graduation; I cannot tell you exactly what's next. That terrifies me.

All my life I've been working and studying to earn this degree, and I actually cannot figure out what's next. Sure, I eventually work as a journalist, my dream job, but how the hell do I get there? When do I actually start my career that I've been working so hard to get? How do I start life with a degree? I'm not ready.

I get that people get internships almost immediately, sometimes. I understand that you can start applying to jobs before you graduate. It just seems like nowadays, you need five years of experience, but how can I possibly have legitimate journalism experience if I've been in school for the past four years earning my degree in order to meet the criteria of having a journalism degree to get hired?! I see job ads all the time of companies looking to hire employees, who can be recent college grads, but need five years of experience within the field. What the actual hell? So, what's next, you ask? I don't know.

Here's what I know. I'll have to start paying student loans six months after I graduate, which is fine because that's how I paid to get through school. But it is so expensive to go to college now, that I'm worried I won't find a job that pays enough money for me to start my payments on time. I hear all the time about deferring payments and stuff like that, but I don't want to. I want to pay my debt off, including student loans, as quickly as possible.

I'm a planner. I like to have a plan and know exactly what comes next, kind of like an itinerary. Graduating college has a sense of unknown aspects to it, and that's why I'm scared. It's also why I'm excited. I have to embrace a sense of adventure and understand that I might not know exactly what comes next, but I have a degree. I can pursue adventures within my degree field and land my dream job, or I can land a job that I never expected to get and maybe that's my real dream.

Not knowing what's next is terrifying and sometimes I feel like I'm not ready to take a step into adventure, but in order to embrace all the work I've put into my education, I don't have to take a step. I have to take a leap, and when I walk across the stage in a month, I think I'll be ready.

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
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