I'm A Grandma Now?

I'm A Grandma Now?

A letter to my grand-littles, whom I ADORE already.

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Big-Little... it's magical, honestly. You get showered with gifts, get to go on sister dates with all of the new members and get to meet your mentor or mentee. As a new member of my sorority, that was the part that I always looked forward to the most.

As a Senior in my sorority now, I look back on my experience with my Pham, Pham Perf, and could not be happier. Although we are all vastly different, it works so well. We are called to be with people that are not like us, and I am forever grateful for the experiences that I have shared with my girls.

My big and I met, and clicked from the start, as did my little and I, who just so happens to be your BIG! They are both so amazing, and I can't wait for y'all to be introduced to the best Pham in the world!

So, to my grand-littles, this one's for y'all.

I am so, so excited that first and foremost, you decided to join the sisterhood that has changed my life, and that I know will change yours as well. I 100% know that if it was not for Phi Mu, that I wouldn't possess half of the qualities that I do to this day. These girls have loved me, stretched me, and believed in me when I didn't believe in myself. I hope you know that your Pham will be right by your side, doing the same things for you. You are already so, so, loved, and I can't wait to SQUEEZE y'all!

Your big just so happens to be one of my all-time favorite people. She is so genuine, kind, and loving to everyone that she meets. I know that y'all will get the same love from her as I did, and will feel so welcomed into this organization. By now, she has already showered you with gifts and made you feel super special.

You are both so beautiful and amazing and I can't wait to share this special bond with y'all.

To my grand-littles, you are SO SO loved and I can't wait to brag on you both 24/7 !!

Love,

G-Big.

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'Big' And 'Little' Are More Than Just Labels

It is a special privilege, an irreplaceable bond that two girls share.

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One night last year, I was at my big's apartment doing my laundry because I was a freshman and did not feel like paying to do my millionth load of laundry. We were hanging out with her roommates when one of them told me about this girl who dropped out of her sorority. And don't get me wrong, I can understand dropping a sorority for many reasons, but this girl did not tell anyone she was dropping out, not even her little. Her little heard that she dropped from other girls in her sorority that she wasn't even close with.

When the little texted her big and asked why she dropped and why she didn't tell her, the big just said she did not think it was a big deal. Little responded with, “But I'm your little? Don't you think I should have known?"

What breaks my heart is that her big responded with, “It's not a big deal. Big and little are just labels anyways. They don't mean anything."

And that is where she's wrong. Big and little are more than just titles or labels.

Being a big and a little is more than just candy, stuffed animals, stickers, T-shirts, and presents. It is more than just posting numerous pictures with the captions “Love my littleeeeeee" or “I have the best big everrrrrr" with an extreme amount of heart and smiley emoji on Instagram. It is a special bond that two girls share in the world of Greek life. It is something that lasts beyond just four years of college.

Your big spent weeks crafting for you just so that everything was just right, and she spent the week lying to you saying “I wish I could've been your big" or “someone else called dibs on you" and sending you BS hints in your big/little baskets just so you are all that much more excited when reveal time comes.

A big is someone who takes you under her wing and adopts you as her own. Bigs are girls who love you unconditionally — your college role model, if you will.

She is someone you look up to, someone whom you strive to be just like.

She is the one who will always be there for you, no matter what.

She is there during the middle of the day when you need someone to go to Starbucks with.

She is the one you want to pre-game with before all the mixers and parties.

But most importantly, she is the one who is there for you in the middle of the night when your boyfriend breaks up with you or cheats on you, or when your parents tell you the are getting a divorce.

She is the one you can always go to for comfort and will always do whatever she can to make you feel better about yourself — whether it takes a wine and chocolate night while watching "Friends" or "Gossip Girl," or a night out on the town. She knows you better than you know yourself. Having a big sister is one of the most valuable privileges of being in a sorority.

Not only is having a big an honor; having a little is, as well. Your little is the girl you spotted during rush who just had that thing about her that made you think, “Dibs, she's mine." She is the girl who was your bid day buddy, the girl you welcomed to the sorority you both call home. You showed her the way through rush blowout, fraternity parties, mixers, and how to dress up for Halloween so she didn't end up looking like Cady Heron at Chris Isen's Halloween party.

Your little is the girl you show off to all your friends. She is the one you will stick up for no matter what. If it is a bad breakup she is going through, having school problems, family issues or if your risk management is out to get her, you are always there for her when she needs you. You teach her how to be the best big so that when she gets her little, your grand-little, she is just as spoiled as your little was. You teach her how to be a better version of herself, and you can only hope that she takes as much from you as you took from your big.

She's your mini-me, and you love her until the day you die.

Being a big and a little is way more than just a label or a title. It is a special privilege, an irreplaceable bond that two girls share. These girls will be by your side the day you get married, and you will be there for them on their big days. Big and little is something that lasts way more than four years short years at college. It is a friendship that lasts a lifetime.

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No Matter How Much You Flaunt Your Letters, Greek Life Does Not Define You

Do what makes you happy, not what everyone else is doing.

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As a student at a university with a major sorority and fraternity presence, I know that those unaffiliated, like myself, can't help but wonder if there's something that we're missing out on. Seeing everyone walk around flaunting their letters can make a non-member feel a little left out. I have been told straight to my face "you're going to regret it if you don't rush." But, in all honesty, I don't.

Now, don't get me wrong, being a part of a sorority or a fraternity sounds incredibly fun. With formals to hold, fundraising events to be a part of, "sister photo shoots" to have, and socials to go to, there never seems to be a dull moment for a Greek life member. Not to mention, those affiliated say they have made their absolute best friends through their sororities or fraternities. My friends that are a part of Greek life are always gloating about it, and I can see why. I joined my past roommate at one of her sorority formals and I genuinely had a ball being able to dress up and pretend it was prom again.

However, as wonderful as all of this is, you don't need to be a part of Greek life in order to have THE college experience. Having letters on your shirts does not mean you are any better or any worse of a student than those without them. The letters do not define you.

As an unaffiliated college student, I have still been able to find my group of "forever friends," join clubs, spend nights out, and get an education (since that is, after all, what we're all here for). As cool as it is to be able to stick Greek letters on the back of your laptop, for me, it just leaves more room for stickers of Harry Styles.

Thankfully, college is a lot different than high school — there aren't really any cliques or status rankings. So, if you aren't a part of Greek life, that does not automatically put you at the bottom of the social ladder. At the end of the day, your affiliation does not matter at all. Instead of using a sorority or fraternity as a resumé booster, unaffiliated students can fill those blanks with other work, internship, volunteer, or extracurricular opportunities.

Sure, being a Greek life member may allow you to network and get connections for future careers, but it isn't the only way to do

so. Employers will not pick those in a fraternity over those who are not. They simply look for well-rounded individuals who are involved in something.

So, whether or not you're a part of a sorority or fraternity, I applaud you for making your own decisions and hopefully taking the college route that you wanted to. It does not matter what you are affiliated with, as long as it makes you happy. Otherwise, you aren't missing out on anything special.

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