If heaven had visitation hours I would probably be the happiest living soul there is. Someone who I love and miss dearly is up there right now.
On April of 2015, my aunt passed away. She was everything to me. I considered her my second mother.
The day she passed had a permanent mark in my heart. I remember it is if it were yesterday. It was my last memory of her.
I was a junior in high school facing a difficult life transition from being with you every day to not seeing you at all.
If heaven had visitation hours I would go watch Family Feud with you because that was our show! Every day at 6 pm we were watching, guessing and laughing at the ridiculous responses people would give.
If heaven had visitation hours I would tell you about the first time I won a race in track in your honor.
If heaven had visitation hours I would give you a big hug and tell God if I can get an extra hour just hug you longer.
If heaven had visitation hours I would tell you that I love you and you were the best (second) mom I've always wanted.
If heaven had visitation hours I would want you to give me advice on how to maintain strong.
If heaven had visitation hours I would see you every single day (if God allows me)
If heaven had visitation hours I would tell you about my pain.
If heaven had visitation hours I would tell you that I'm not okay.
If heaven had visitation hours I would laugh with you to get my mind off the bad things.
If heaven had visitation hours I would want you to assure me that I have a purpose here on Earth and that I will be happier.
I would tell you that ever since you left, I think about you and pray for you every single day. Not one single day goes by without thinking about you. I grew up with you. I was inspired by you. I aspired to be a great person just like you because you were my role model.
You left so unexpectedly at a time I needed you. I don't blame you. I would never. But, I just wish I got to enjoy my accomplishments with you from getting into the National Honor Society to being a State qualifier in Track & Field to becoming a double major in college.
Nothing is the same without you here. And it may never be. How could it be when the one person I trusted, told me secrets to, confided in, gave me advice, and loved me as if I were her own is no longer here with me, physically?
I can't hug you. I can't cry to you like I use to when something is terribly wrong. I can't watch Family Feud with you like the good old days. I can't have sleepovers or go to work with you.
All I have is our memories, our cherish memories that we made from when I was a little girl. Over 12 years of good memories and good fun times with you.
All smiles from here.
I'm glad I just didn't say goodbye because I am never good at letting go, and maybe there is a reason for that. But, I'm optimistic that someday we'll reunite and catch up on the many years without each other (physically).
I know you'll always be here in spirit---
But, If heaven had visitation hours I would reassure you that I will always be back and that we will always be together no matter what happens.
I will make you proud because I know you're always here every step through the way, helping me with my struggles.
I love you and miss you more than anything on this entire planet.
Moments like this I really did wish heaven had visitation hours. I might have to make a deal with God, who knows?