I'm going into my senior year in college and have never been to one frat party, date party or even a formal in college… because I never joined a sorority. I'm not in one and I never "rushed" so it's hard for me to answer questions relating to sororities. All I have are a few reasons why I personally didn't think it was for me.
HUGE DISCLAIMER: This is NOT me in any way trying to bash sororities. I have absolutely nothing negative to say about them. In fact, I know they can be super empowering for some young women and I totally commend and respect that 100 percent! I'm just sharing my experience and why I decided not to.
So, I go to a school where Greek life is kind of a big deal...
I remember sort of feeling left out my freshman year. Although I got super close to my roommate who didn't rush either, it was still a weird time to not feel completely integrated into your school. When I told someone I wasn't rushing, they usually gave me a strange look, and I started to feel like I didn't belong at all. I was talking to my roommate at the time and she reminded me that if I wasn't interested in Greek life until I found out everyone else seemed to be, why should I do it?
It was then that I realized that the only reason I was even considering joining was that everyone else seemed to be. Before coming to college, the thought of joining a sorority never really crossed my mind. I know some girls dream about joining a sorority in college, and it's something that they look forward to.
The best advice that I have is to not just do it because everyone else is. One huge thing I've learned so far in college is that you can't care about what other people think of you. This is YOUR time. I truly regret feeling so embarrassed that I didn't want to rush. Like... What a waste of energy and stress.
Now as a senior, I have friends that are in sororities as well as friends that aren't. While I felt really left out at first, I've realized over time that it's not really a barrier between friendships. Most people in college are so nice and accepting that it doesn't really matter if you're in a sorority or not!
The number of social obligations didn't seem to fit with my personality.
Formals, socials, recruitment, etc. There's no doubt that sorority life is jam-packed with events. It's completely true that the social aspect of college is just as important as the academic aspect - yes, agreed. I've definitely said this before, but I'm a bit of an introverted extrovert.
What the heck is an introverted-extrovert? How does that make any sense?
Growing up, I was super introverted. As I've gotten older, I've become a lot more outgoing. I love being around people, but here's where the introverted part comes back. As much as I enjoy being around people, I also enjoy alone time. I don't necessarily like to have plans every single day of the week. I'm the type of person that likes to recharge.
It's super expensive.
This is probably one of the biggest reasons I shied away from joining. Since I wasn't completely in love with the idea, I didn't want to be spending the high amount of money on dues. College is already expensive, and for me, to add on that extra expense for something that I knew I wasn't passionate about just wasn't the way I wanted to do college.
Coming from a single parent household as a first-generation college student this would've been nearly impossible for me to pay for.
Just had a gut feeling that it wasn't for me.
Listening to your gut in college is what it's all about. If something makes you uncomfortable, or you know deep inside that something isn't right for you, you're probably right.
I really listened to myself on this one. I tried and tried to scrape together reasons why I might want to be in a sorority, and no matter how hard I tried, it didn't feel authentic. One of the BEST things about college is that you have the opportunity to make your own decisions and do the things that make YOU happy.
Was it weird freshmen year when it seemed like "everyone" was rushing? Yes, honestly. But is it weird now? Not at all. As I said, I have friends that are in sororities and friends that aren't, and I love them all!
I have zero regrets about not joining a sorority, and I'm proud that I was able to listen to myself and realize it wasn't for me.
