The Husband I'm Praying For

The Husband I'm Praying For

My future husband should be a mirror of the Lord.
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Growing up, we have all probably wondered about the man we will marry - what he looks like, what his voice sounds like, what color his eyes are etc. We have all watched Disney's fairy tale movies like "Cinderella," "The Little Mermaid" and "Sleeping Beauty." The love stories that Disney creates can be merely fiction. Knowing this leads many people to believe that kind of love does not exist. As a kid, I always wanted to be Ariel and find my Prince Eric. The older I got, I realized that that kind of man does not exist without God. The Disney love story only exists through God. God writes a love story that we can not imagine. That is why we should be confident in His will for our lives. We should be confident in the love story God is writing for us.

I woke up this morning thinking about relationships and how hard it is to be in one at the age of 20. I'm not looking for a husband or a significant other right now, but I am praying for that special someone that God has planned for my life. Whether God places this special man in my life next week or in 20 years, I am going to be praying for him. I pray for the man that seeks God and His guidance. I just can't imagine being with someone who doesn't love God as much as I do. Honestly, I've decided that from this point on, I am going to let God guide my footsteps. I refuse to worry about all that is wrong with me when I should just be praying for the man God has in store for me.

Girls my age have been blinded to what a good boyfriend is and what a potential husband really looks like. I pray for the man who prays before each meal and thanks God for his simple blessings. I don't want to end up settling for less-I know what I deserve and I know that God has a plan. The husband I pray for is the man I want my daughters looking up to and being proud to have as a father. I want my children to know that their father loves Jesus and is not ashamed of it. A man who is ashamed of Jesus or only loves Jesus on Sundays is not husband material. I want my husband to be the man people associate Jesus with.

I pray that my husband is humble. I pray that my husband makes strangers feel his loving presence and know that Jesus is present in his life. I pray that my husband wants the same things I do, like 15 children-- just kidding. But, I do pray that he has a sense of humor and that he understands my need for laughter and sunshine in my life. I pray that my husband seeks Jesus during hard times and understands when the answer to his prayers are no. I hope my husband understands that no matter what, God has a plan and an answer, even if it isn't what he wants. I want my husband to be understanding of my needs and what I want out of life. I want my husband to encourage me and my decisions. I want my husband to be the man that my children know is praying for them. I want my husband to be the man who cries the first time he sees me in my wedding dress walking down the aisle. I want my husband to be the man our kids can run to at 3:00 A.M because they had a bad dream and need him to hold them. I want my husband to have a loving and sincere heart. I pray that the man I am going to marry is praying for me, just like I'm praying for him.


Cover Image Credit: Alec Vanderboom

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I'm Tired Of Trendy Christianity

Life with Jesus is so much more than one big coffee break.
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Okay, you're a Christian. After all, you have all of the tools you need.

You have your densely highlighted and underlined Bible, your Eno, your Chacos, your Patagonia backpack and of course, your beloved Camelbak or Nalgene water bottle that is covered in name-brand stickers.

Your days consist of going outside, chilling in your Eno and blasting "Oceans" by Hillsong and "Good, Good Father" by Chris Tomlin. Your room is decorated with lots of inspirational quotes, maps with variations of "send me" close by and probably some pictures of your last mission trip. Your Instagram page is full of pictures of your friends that are "gems," captions of how thankful you are for certain things and pictures of the last country you visited that say "take me back."

Oh, and you might have a tattoo in Greek.

Okay, if you know me, you know that I literally just described myself. So, when I say what I'm about to, I'm not bashing anyone at all. I am guilty of all of these things and God has really laid these things on my heart that I've found myself doing time after time.

It seems that in the time we live in, if you're going to be a Christian, you have to have all of the right things, and I'm tired of it. Christianity is not about having a certain look or personality, but about having a deep, meaningful relationship with Christ. I think a lot of people have the wrong idea about what being in a relationship with Christ actually looks like. I'm here to tell you that it's not anything like what I described.

Being in a relationship with Christ is not easy, and it's certainly not the most trendy thing out there (maybe on your college campus, but not in the real world.) It's about surrendering everything you have to a God who sent his son to be crucified for things you've done wrong.

It's more than just drinking designer coffee and Bible journaling and "being intentional."

It's about finding peace and joy in spending time with our creator. I know a lot of people just like me who fit the stereotype perfectly who have some of the deepest, most meaningful relationships with Christ, but I also know a lot of people who fit the stereotype who are just faking it.

I'm so tired of people who do not know Christ thinking that they have to have a certain look or personality about them and it hinders them from running into the loving arms of Jesus. We've made Christianity a club, and that's not okay. We have taken God's beauty and grace and made a fad out of it.

So, friends, I'm not saying that we can't have these things and still be Christians (because honestly, I like the way I live life with these things I've been given, and this is just who I am,) but I am saying that having these things are not what makes us Christians. So, be careful how you live out your walk.

Are you just doing it to be trendy, or do you have a deep and meaningful relationship with Christ?

Walking with Jesus is more than just a big coffee break.

Photo by Priscilla Du Preez on Unsplash

Cover Image Credit: Tumblr/Psalm Thirty Seven Four

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Our First Bundle Of Joy, COMING SOON!

After years of trying, hoping, praying, and wishing, we finally have a baby on the way!

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According to Larry Barretto, "Babies are bits of star-dust blown from the hand of God. Lucky is the woman who knows the pangs of birth for she has held a star."

Things would be simple if we, as women, could reach into the heavens and pluck our perfect little star ourselves. However, that is not how God intended us to bring our bundles of joy into the world. Instead, he chose the female body as a safe haven for our stars. It is here that they grow brighter and brighter until they burst with light.

This is a new beginning that many women crave. We swoon when we hear the first heartbeat. We scream with joy when the first kick has us reaching for the nearest object. We glow as we watch our bellies get bigger and bigger, knowing that with each passing day, we get closer and closer to holding our greatest joy in life.

What happens when those moments never come though? What happens when you have done everything right, but still, no star? What do you do when every single negative test begins to break down your spirit?

These are the questions that emerge when reality settles in and you realize, what if you cannot get pregnant?

Your heart starts to sink as the days, weeks, months, and years go by. With every failed pregnancy test, you lose a piece of your heart. What used to feel like passionate love with your partner, now feels like a forced five minutes whenever your phone alerts you that it is time to try again. The future, full of sleepless nights, diaper changing, and endless unforgettable milestones, now seems distant and bleak.

Now imagine feeling that for two years. Two years of heartbreak. Two years of feeling like you are not capable. Two years of reaching for something that seemed impossible. Two years of never-ending sadness.

These past two years have been difficult to endure. Every morning would begin with a prayer that God would somehow bless us with our own star. Every night ended with pleas to take away the sadness that dwelled within our hearts.

For a moment, we felt unheard. We felt that there would always be an empty space in our lives that only our very own child could fill. These feelings were almost enough to make us give up. Truthfully, maybe we were giving up. Maybe, if this test turned out to be negative like the rest of them, we would call it quits and fill the void with objects that would never amount to the joy a child would have brought us.

It was on January 25, 2019 that giving up seemed like a good idea. God had decided that motherhood would have to come in some other form or fashion. It was this decision that we were ready to accept.

As we watched one line form to give us the answer we already expected, we vowed to be done with it. Our hearts broke for the last time. Just as we began to burn all the memories we had formed in our heads, something started to appear on the stick. It was faint and almost unbelievable, but it was there.

A second line.

A second line giving us hope and allowing our hearts to flutter with joy for a moment. As the line became clearer and more distinct, hope turned into a blissful reality and the fluttering was now masked by the loud heartbeat of a woman who could now see herself having her very own star.

Hundreds of miles away was my very own heartbeat, thumping loud and clear for all to hear THAT I AM GOING TO BE AN AUNT!

That is right, after two years of trying, my sister, Harley, is finally expecting her very first baby in September!

Harley and Travis are going to be absolutely wonderful parents and I am so excited to watch them grow as a couple and as a family! Their experience has shown me the importance of perseverance and never giving up on something that means the world to you. I am so thankful that my sister is such a headstrong woman who did not give up because now I can look forward to spoiling my first niece or nephew this year!

To all of you woman who are on a similar journey, do not give up. It is true that some things are not meant to be, but there is always a way and that is something you should never forget. A mother's love is strong and true no matter how it is established.

To you, Harley, I love you and I thank God every day for giving you the blessing you have been asking for!

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