4 Greek Figures, 4 Mysterious Poems: Can You Guess Which Is Whom?

4 Greek Figures, 4 Mysterious Poems: Can You Guess Which Is Whom?

Let's see how well you know your Greek mythology.
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The following sets of poetry describes a prominent Greek figure in popular mythology; do you think you can figure out who is being described without being stumped? Answers are at the very bottom of the page if you wish to check. Good luck!


1. The Man And His World

His hands are calloused, rough, rugged

such as the terrain of the Himalayas

but instead of climbing mountains

he was holding up the sky.

A friend-turned-foe once pleaded

“Help me, allow me to rest.”

So he took the burden

fooled for eternity.

Meanwhile, the world grew bigger;

thousands of years culminated into man-made destruction,

war and inner turmoil,

infestation of mortals,

until the world was too big.

His hands crumbled,

his shoulders sagged,

his head bowed,

until his world consumed him.

2. The Short-Tempered God

His ego the size of his throne in Olympia,

he commands the power of the sky.

He steals the hearts of numerous mortal woman,

angering his immortal wife who had cursed one too many.

His two brethren rule the dead and the sea

forever in conflict the trinity stays.

He hurls his bolt at those who displease him,

his weapon of choice made by faithful cyclops.

Commander of wind spirits and cloud nymphs

his domain remains the jewel of civilization.

3. Huntress

A maiden for eternity,

she refuses the company of men except that of Orion

whom her fiery brother had killed out of spite.

Her father the king and her mother an affair,

Hera subjects her to scorn.

Her Hunters become her sisters until the end of time

engaged in the pursuit of justice,

chasing evil straight into Tartarus.

Releasing arrow after arrow,

her target remains her focus and the center of her world;

she never misses.

Silver like the moonlight,

she casts a glow that few are lucky to see.

4. Embracer Of Darkness

He craves death, destruction, danger;

he had stolen his wife from the mortal world

now she is forced to stay in his realm

for she had eaten the cursed seeds.

His second companion blessed with three heads,

the beast guards the entry to his unholy domain.

The helm of darkness, his prized possession,

wielded by Perseus in his battle against Medusa.

His palace resides next to the River Styx

where a promise broken warrants a fate worse than death.

Life after death is his choice;

he will decide: Fields of Asphodel or Elysium.

Lord help the soul that attempts to escape his clutches.


Answers:

1. Atlas

2. Zeus

3. Artemis

4. Hades

Cover Image Credit: Flickr Creative Commons

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35 Major Life Facts According To Nick Miller

"All booze is good booze, unless it's weak booze."
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Fact: If you watch "New Girl," you love Nick Miller.

You can't help it. He's an adorable, lovable mess of a man and you look forward to seeing him and his shenanigans each week. While living the infamous and incomparable life of Nick Miller, and obviously Julius Pepperwood— he has learned many valuable laws of the land. And, although Nick refuses to learn anything from anyone besides his mysterious, old Asian friend Tran, he does have a few lessons he'd like to teach us.

Here are 35 facts of life according to 'Nick Milla Nick Milla':

1. Drinking keeps you healthy.

"I'm not gonna get sick. No germ can live in a body that is 65% beer."

2. Dinosaurs never existed.

"I don't believe dinosaurs existed. I've seen the science. I don't believe it."


3. A paper bag is a bank.

"A bank is just a paper bag but with fancier walls."


4. Having sex is similar to delivering mail.

"I'm like a mailman, except instead of mail it's hot sex that I deliver."

5. Moonwalking is a foolproof way to get out of any awkward situation.

Jess (about Nick): "Now he won't even talk to me. I saw him this morning and he just panic moonwalked away from me. He does that sometimes."

6. Using a movie reference is also a great way.

Cece: "Come on, get up!"

Nick: "No, I don't dance. I'm from that town in "Footloose."

7. There's no reason to wash towels.

Nick: "I don’t wash the towel. The towel washes me. Who washes a towel?"

Schmidt: "You never wash your towel?"

Nick: "What am I gonna do? Wash the shower next? Wash a bar of soap?"

8. Exes are meant to be avoided at all costs (especially if/unless they're Caroline)

"I don't deal with exes, they're part of the past. You burn them swiftly and you give their ashes to Poseidon."

9. IKEA furniture is not as intimidating as it looks.

"I'm building you the dresser. I love this stuff. It's like high-stakes LEGOs."

10. You don't need forks if you have hands.

Jess: "That's gross. Get a fork, man."

Nick: "I got two perfectly good forks at the end of my arms!"

11. Sex has a very specific definition.


"It's not sex until you put the straw in the coconut."

12. Doors are frustrating.

"I will push if I want to push! Come on! I hate doors!"

13. All booze is good booze.

"Can I get an alcohol?"

14. ...unless it's weak booze.

"Schmidt, that is melon flavored liquor! That is 4-proof! That is safe to drink while you're pregnant!"

15. Writers are like pregnant women.

Jess: "You know what that sound is? It's the sound of an empty uterus."

Nick: "I can top that easily. I'm having a hard time with my zombie novel."

Jess: "Are you really comparing a zombie novel to my ability to create life?"

Nick: "I'm a writer, Jess. We create life."

16. All bets must be honored.

"There is something serious I have to tell you about the future. The name of my first-born child needs to be Reginald VelJohnson. I lost a bet to Schmidt."

17. Adele's voice is like a combination of Fergie and Jesus.

"Adele is amazing."

18. Beyoncé is extremely trustworthy.

"I'd trust Beyoncé with my life. We be all night."

19. Fish, on the other hand, are not.


“Absolutely not. You know I don’t trust fish! They breathe water. That's crazy!"

20. Bar mitzvahs are terrifying.

Schmidt: "It's a bar mitzvah!"

Nick: "I am NOT watching a kid get circumcised!"

21. ...so are blueberries.

Jess: "So far, Nick Miller's list of fears is sharks, tap water, real relationships..."

Nick: "And blueberries."

22. Take your time with difficult decisions. Don't be rash.


Jess: "You care about your burritos more than my children, Nick?"

Nick: "You're putting me in a tough spot!"

23. Getting into shape is not easy.

"I mean, I’m not doing squats or anything. I’m trying to eat less donuts."

24. We aren't meant to talk about our feelings.

"If we needed to talk about feelings, they would be called talkings."


25. We're all a little bit too hard on ourselves.

"The enemy is the inner me."

26. Freezing your underwear is a good way to cool off.


"Trust me, I'm wearing frozen underpants right now and I feel amazing. I'm gonna grab some old underpants and put a pair into the freezer for each of you."

27. Public nudity is normal.

"Everbody has been flashed countless times."

28. Alcohol is a cure-all.


"You treat an outside wound with rubbing alcohol. You treat an inside wound with drinking alcohol."

29. Horses are aliens.

"I believe horses are from outer-space."


30. Turtles should actually be called 'shell-beavers.'

Jess: "He calls turtles 'shell-beavers."

Nick: "Well, that's what they should be called."

31. Trench coats are hot.


"This coat has clean lines and pockets that don't quit, and it has room for your hips. And, when I wear it, I feel hot to trot!"


32. Sparkles are too.

"Now, my final bit of advice, and don't get sensitive on this, but you've got to change that top it's terrible and you've got to throw sparkles on. Sparkles are in. SPARKLES ARE IN."

33. Introspection can lead to a deeper knowing of oneself.

"I'm not convinced I know how to read. I've just memorized a lot of words."


34. It's important to live in the moment.

"I know this isn't gonna end well but the middle part is gonna be awesome."


35. Drinking makes you cooler.

Jess: "Drinking to be cool, Nick? That's not a real thing."

Nick: "That's the only thing in the world I know to be true."

Cover Image Credit: Hollywood Reporter

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Toulouse Grande, Ari's Dog, Stole The Spotlight In The 'thank u, next' Music Video

Any dog other than Toulouse Grande? Thank you, next!

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For those of you who don't know (or who are jumping on the Ariana Grande train just now), Toulouse is one of Ariana's many dogs. He's appeared in a few other music videos, like 'Right There' and 'No Tears Left To Cry'. However, his cameo was most prominent in her latest music video for 'thank u, next', which, by the way, broke YouTube records.

1. He's first seen rolling up with Ari, dressed as Elle Woods from Legally Blonde

Hannah Lux Davis

Toulouse called shotgun.

2. Toulouse stars as Bruiser Woods, Elle's sidekick

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Name a more iconic duo.

3. He's featured in some close-ups

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Every other dog on the planet is QUAKING in their boots.

4. Toulouse has no fear of the spotlight with his mommy by his side

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Nerves? Thank you, next.

5. He even wears his own custom swimsuit 

Hannah Lux Davis

He's living his best life.

6. How could you forget his studded collar?

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This collar probably costs more than my car.

7. He is completely unfazed by the cameras 

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He was BORN for showbiz.

8. At one point he literally watches himself on TV

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An absolute ICON.

9. He was even seen being pampered in behind the scenes footage

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Sadly, this scene didn't make it to the actual music video.

10. He got all the affection in between takes

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Only the best smooches for Toulouse.

11. Toulouse was an absolute spotlight-stealer

Hannah Lux Davis

He is killing it.

12. Keep living your best life, Toulouse!

Hannah Lux Davis

We'll keep living vicariously through you.

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