Throughout my 18 years on this planet, I have noticed a trend in the various conflicts that I have been a part of and witnessed. Most people tend to get into arguments when they fail to understand the other person's viewpoint. We get so consumed by our own problems and emotions that we forget to consider what other people feel. We also tend to favor ourselves in arguments because we feel bad for ourselves and understand the decisions we make.
Over the years, I've learned how to avoid arguments by stepping back and considering the other person's circumstances and if it is truly worth bringing up. For example, in a relationship, if one partner does something without intending any harm, like being friendly with a coworker, and you feel jealous, take a step back and think about the situation before immediately confronting your partner.
Try to think of yourself in a similar situation - you may not act in the exact same way, but imagining the situation can help you understand why your partner acted in the way they did. Your partner was most likely just being friendly and not thinking about how you would react to this interaction. You are probably feeling insecure in the relationship and the problem may just be within yourself. You can resolve this issue first and calmly talk to your partner about your feelings after, instead of getting into a heated argument at the moment.
Understanding others or even just trying to makes us less likely to be enraged by their actions or attitude. This can even aid in simple arguments. For instance, if someone in the house forgot to do their dishes, they might be tired from work or busy studying and instead of yelling at them, you can just help them out a bit. I have found this way of thinking to be extremely useful in life. It not only results in fewer arguments but less frustration over all.
Trying to think from different perspectives allows you to see past what is on the surface. Because of this, I am less likely to be upset about what people say about me and what they do. Overall, it allows you to improve the quality of your own life.
