Are you easily affected by another person’s emotions? Do you suddenly get down in the dumps when you realize that someone else’s emotions are off?
If so, maybe you’re excessively empathetic.
"Psychology Today" defines empathy as “the experience of understanding another person’s condition from their perspective. You place yourself in their shoes and feel what they are feeling.”
Don’t get me wrong, empathy is advantageous for a number of reasons: an increase in emotional intelligence, relationship development, discovering diverse perspectives and the chance to connect with others on a more intimate level. Empathy also helps you converse with people in a more effective way; when you understand how someone feels and thinks, you will have a better idea of what to say and how to say it – in a way that he or she can understand.
However, too much empathy will make you absolutely miserable. For someone who is overly empathetic, I find myself taking on every emotion that someone exposes: sadness, anxiousness, irritableness, depression, grumpiness, etc. The vibes that people give off are the vibes that I take on. This is not only emotionally draining but it’s an unnecessary burden heavily placed on your everyday life. Too much empathy is simply overwhelming.
“According to experts, awareness of the potential for empathy overload doesn’t mean people should stop checking their Facebook news feed or cover their ears while prayer requests are announced. Instead, individuals can learn to set boundaries, protecting their own mental health while continuing to be with others in their times of need,” Deseret News explains.
So how can you continue to empathize with others without allowing it to completely take over your emotions?
Recognize when it’s happening.
It’s so easy to get wrapped up in someone else’s emotions – you’re so focused on his or her depressive state and the next thing you know you’re now acting depressed too…for literally no reason! You don’t even know why you’re upset, but you just are. If you can realize that this onset of emotions is happening at that time, you have a better chance of distancing yourself from the emotion.
Find out who’s triggering the onset.
Certain people have a tendency to give off negative vibes. If you’re overly empathetic, you probably tune into those emotions and start feeling those energies too. According to an online source, “People who are particularly difficult for emotional empaths include criticizer, the victim, the narcissist, and the controller.” Hence, those are the people you need to separate yourself from in certain situations.
Surround yourself with uplifting people and positive situations.
If you find yourself constantly surrounded by negative energy, or one particular person who brings you down, make a change! I’m not saying to completely cut off the person or stop helping them with their problems, but what I am saying is that, at the end of the day, you need to focus on yourself and your happiness. That said, fill your day with people who exude positive energy, people who lift you up and people who make you a better person.
Set aside time for yourself.
A time of solitude is vital for everyone (even the social butterflies). This time allows you to focus on yourself, it allows you to do the things that make you happy and it allows you to wind down. This time gives you the opportunity to get away from the madness of the world or the people who simply bring you down with their negative emotions. Make sure to set time aside for yourself every day.
