Falling in love with someone is hard. I don't mean the actual process of falling in love, but the aftermath of it. The emotions and the difficulties that you can come across when you love someone. Especially, if that person doesn't love you back the same way.

I was in love with him, and it was the worst thing that had ever happened to me. All day I couldn't wait to see him, but the second I was around him, I was miserable. The second he would leave I would miss him already. There was nothing I could do about it except for try to turn away and not face the feelings I felt.

Every day we would talk. We hung out multiple times a week and I was continuously being lead on to believing we would date. What was calm on the outside was a vicious cycle and a battle for myself on the inside.

The day finally came when I knew there was no hope and that there never would be. I knew I could either continue to be pathetically in love with this person, or I could leave it be and move on. I chose the latter, and it was difficult but accomplishable.

Forcing yourself to fall out of love with someone isn't natural, but loving someone who doesn't love you back can be detrimental. So, you have to do what's best for yourself.

I stopped replying to the texts. I stopped looking at his Instagram to try and spot the new girl he was talking to. I stopped writing about him (until today) and I stopped desperately trying to see him only a daily basis, even if we were great friends.

It's truly been difficult. Seeing him happy with other girls when all along it could have been me. Thinking to myself I wasn't good enough to leave the friend zone. I stopped intentionally thinking about him at night before bed and started to set my mind on other things. I would watch Shameless before bed instead, and focus my attention on Lip Gallagher. It was a great distraction for a while.

But sometimes, the memories and feelings can't be controlled. Sometimes, I have to allow myself to have the moments of staring off into space wondering "What if?" and allowing myself to be sad about it. Sometimes I have to dwell in my own self pity.

I allowed myself to fall out of love with him, or at least that's what I'm telling myself. I'm a firm believer that once you have loved someone, you will always have a place for them in your heart. You will always care about them, even if they aren't in your life, and you will always, in a way, love them.