Home Doesn't Feel Like Home After College

Home Doesn't Feel Like Home After College

Every year, it's a little different and seems less like the home we used to know.
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Every year, we make the trudge home for break. And every year, it's a little different and seems less like the home we used to know. Let's face it: we're growing up. This feeling is extremely bittersweet.

Being at home was something that once felt so comfortable, and still does... kinda. This was the house you grew up in, completed elementary in, graduated high school in, and then left behind for college. You created so many relationships under this same roof. You had awesome friendships, relationships with your family, and boyfriends/girlfriends. But each time you go home, you start to realize how each one of these relationships you had in high school, tends to change.

You find out who's worth spending your only free day with, or even hour. Going home tends to be hectic as you try to make time for every single person left behind in your hometown. Spending time with your family is automatically the first thing you have/want to do. Let's face it, its the most important. Next, your old high school friends. This includes some people who never left and some in the same boat as you returning home from college on a holiday break.

You get so stressed trying to make time for all of these people, but ask yourself one question. How many of these people text or call me regularly and check up on me? How about reaching out to you to tell you how proud you make them, or that you're killin' the college game? How many of these people do I do the same for? Is it worth spending my only free hour with them? Or stressing about what they might think if I don't sacrifice my time to see them?

I'm here to tell you to not feel bad. If anyone, including family, wants to be a part of your life, they will make the time. Anyone who loves you and cares for you will make it known. Going home shouldn't be a time of stress, but a time to relax.

Relationships back home will continue to change, and feel less like they used to, but that's OK.

Relationships with people back home are just different than the ones you have with your college friends, and that's OK. They're different because we're all in different chapters of our life. It's hard to relate to someone who never went to college and talk about things they have no idea about. It's hard to relate sometimes to their lives as their much different that ours, and that's OK.

Just because you don't get to spend time with someone from back home over break, doesn't mean you don't care. As we get older, we get busier. Adulting sucks, but having friends who understand that just because you don't reach out to them every time you're in town because your busy with family, and that you aren't "mad" at them or care/love them any less, are the ones worth keeping.

These friends are the mature ones, the ones who understand that life is one big mess, and if you called them out of the blue one day, they'd pick up. People who make you feel drained or overwhelmed when a text from them pops up on your phone, let them go. Life is too short to feel stressed over someone taking up your time.

Going home will forever be different because of these relationships. I always say, it's not the place itself, but the people. Cherish the healthy, happy relationships you have back at home, and let the ones that are anything less, go.

Cover Image Credit: https://www.pexels.com/photo/men-s-white-button-up-dress-shirt-708440/

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5 Perks Of Having A Long-Distance Best Friend

The best kind of long-distance relationship.
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Sometimes, people get annoyed when girls refer to multiple people as their "best friend," but they don't understand. We have different types of best friends. There's the going out together best friend, the see each other everyday best friend and the constant, low maintenance best friend.

While I'm lucky enough to have two out of the three at the same school as me, my "low maintenance" best friend goes to college six hours from Baton Rouge.

This type of friend is special because no matter how long you go without talking or seeing each other, you're always insanely close. Even though I miss her daily, having a long-distance best friend has its perks. Here are just a few of them...

1. Getting to see each other is a special event.

Sometimes when you see someone all the time, you take that person and their friendship for granted. When you don't get to see one of your favorite people very often, the times when you're together are truly appreciated.

2. You always have someone to give unbiased advice.

This person knows you best, but they probably don't know the people you're telling them about, so they can give you better advice than anyone else.

3. You always have someone to text and FaceTime.

While there may be hundreds of miles between you, they're also just a phone call away. You know they'll always be there for you even when they can't physically be there.

4. You can plan fun trips to visit each other.

When you can visit each other, you get to meet the people you've heard so much about and experience all the places they love. You get to have your own college experience and, sometimes, theirs, too.

5. You know they will always be a part of your life.

If you can survive going to school in different states, you've both proven that your friendship will last forever. You both care enough to make time for the other in the midst of exams, social events, and homework.

The long-distance best friend is a forever friend. While I wish I could see mine more, I wouldn't trade her for anything.

Cover Image Credit: Just For Laughs-Chicago

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8 Things You Know To Be True When Your Best Friend Lives An Ocean Away

It may be hard for some to understand, but this friendship is actually one of the relationships you cherish the most.

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Friendships on any continent have their challenges, but just imagine what it's like when you're trying to navigate what it means to be friends with someone when you live oceans apart from each other! For many, long-distance friendships are impossible, but if you put in enough effort, you can make them work! And if you are in one of these relationships, you'll definitely agree that these eight things are true.

1.  You have to schedule FaceTime "dates" because you can't just walk down the hall to say hi.

Madelyn Neal

There's a delicate balance in managing your local friends and making the time to talk to your friends overseas. Sometimes people just don't understand why you choose to stay in your room on the phone instead of going to parties!

2. Weirdly, they know a LOT about your local friends.

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Now in conversations when you want to spill the tea about so-and-so who did this to someone else, your international friend already knows who they are and most likely has a nickname for them to help them remember who you're always talking about. It makes it easier to finish your story faster and helps you to feel closer to each other despite the distance!

3. You're constantly making plans.

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Since you realize the only way you'll ever get to see each other is if one of you takes a 9-hour plane ride, you plan every second of your time to show them your world, favorite restaurants, and quick bits of your culture before they have to go back!

4. You never waste time fighting!

Madelyn Neal

Your limited time on the phone with each other is never spent arguing over petty disagreements, it's spent really appreciating all that you have in common and laughing a lot.

5. Your other friends can't understand how you can be so close to someone you never see in person.

Madelyn Neal

In fact, for many of us, we hardly spend any time together. One of my best friends is a girl I've only seen about four times over the years, but nevertheless, we definitely have one of those lifelong connections!

6. You're always working with a slight language barrier.

Madelyn Neal

In almost every conversation you have, there are at least a few minutes fumbling around and trying to explain a word to each other that doesn't quite translate to other languages.

7. You ask them every day if they suddenly have plans to move across the world.

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You can't help but try to convince them to pack up everything they own and ship it all across the world just so you can hang out more than once every couple years!

8. You wouldn't change a thing about it!

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Having a friend from a different country not only gives you such a great understanding for their culture and an appreciation for global diversity, but you also see how lucky you are to have a friend like them, even with all the distance in between!

These friendships certainly come with their own challenges, but it is clear to you that you wouldn't have it any other way! Despite thousands of miles in between, you keep making future plans because one day you know you won't be long distance! And even if you are, you love them anyway!

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