Home Doesn't Feel Like Home After College

Home Doesn't Feel Like Home After College

Every year, it's a little different and seems less like the home we used to know.
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Every year, we make the trudge home for break. And every year, it's a little different and seems less like the home we used to know. Let's face it: we're growing up. This feeling is extremely bittersweet.

Being at home was something that once felt so comfortable, and still does... kinda. This was the house you grew up in, completed elementary in, graduated high school in, and then left behind for college. You created so many relationships under this same roof. You had awesome friendships, relationships with your family, and boyfriends/girlfriends. But each time you go home, you start to realize how each one of these relationships you had in high school, tends to change.

You find out who's worth spending your only free day with, or even hour. Going home tends to be hectic as you try to make time for every single person left behind in your hometown. Spending time with your family is automatically the first thing you have/want to do. Let's face it, its the most important. Next, your old high school friends. This includes some people who never left and some in the same boat as you returning home from college on a holiday break.

You get so stressed trying to make time for all of these people, but ask yourself one question. How many of these people text or call me regularly and check up on me? How about reaching out to you to tell you how proud you make them, or that you're killin' the college game? How many of these people do I do the same for? Is it worth spending my only free hour with them? Or stressing about what they might think if I don't sacrifice my time to see them?

I'm here to tell you to not feel bad. If anyone, including family, wants to be a part of your life, they will make the time. Anyone who loves you and cares for you will make it known. Going home shouldn't be a time of stress, but a time to relax.

Relationships back home will continue to change, and feel less like they used to, but that's OK.

Relationships with people back home are just different than the ones you have with your college friends, and that's OK. They're different because we're all in different chapters of our life. It's hard to relate to someone who never went to college and talk about things they have no idea about. It's hard to relate sometimes to their lives as their much different that ours, and that's OK.

Just because you don't get to spend time with someone from back home over break, doesn't mean you don't care. As we get older, we get busier. Adulting sucks, but having friends who understand that just because you don't reach out to them every time you're in town because your busy with family, and that you aren't "mad" at them or care/love them any less, are the ones worth keeping.

These friends are the mature ones, the ones who understand that life is one big mess, and if you called them out of the blue one day, they'd pick up. People who make you feel drained or overwhelmed when a text from them pops up on your phone, let them go. Life is too short to feel stressed over someone taking up your time.

Going home will forever be different because of these relationships. I always say, it's not the place itself, but the people. Cherish the healthy, happy relationships you have back at home, and let the ones that are anything less, go.

Cover Image Credit: https://www.pexels.com/photo/men-s-white-button-up-dress-shirt-708440/

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Dear Mom, Now That I'm Older

A letter to the woman who made me the woman I am today.
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Dear Mom,

Now that I'm older, I definitely appreciate you a lot more than I did as a kid. I appreciate the little things, from the random text messages to constantly tagging me on Facebook in your "funny" photos and sending me pins of stuff I like on Pinterest. Now that I'm older, I can look back and realize that everything I am is all because of you. You've made me strong but realize it's okay to cry. You've shown me how a mother gives everything to her children to give them a better life than she had, even when she's left with nothing. And, most importantly you've taught me to never give up and without this, I would not be where I am today.

Mom, now that I'm older, I realize that you're the best friend I'm ever going to have. You cheer me on when I try new things and support me in deciding to be whatever person I want to be. Thank you for never telling me I can't do something and helping me figure out ways to be the best woman I can be. Your love for me is unconditional. They say true, unconditional love can only come from God, but mom, I think you're a pretty close second.

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Now that I'm older, I don't get to see you as much. But not seeing you as much just makes the times I do get to see you the absolute best, and I look forward to it every time. Now that I'm older, I'm not going to live at home. But, I promise to always come back because I know the door is always open. Your house is always going to be my home, and no other place is going to be the same.

Now that I'm older, I realize how much I miss you taking care of me. I miss you making me dinner, making sure I was doing well in school, and taking me to endless appointments. I miss you waking me up for school and then waking me up again because I didn't listen the first time.

But, Mom, now that I'm older, I can see all that you've done for me. I can look back and see how big of a brat I was but you still loved me (and let me live) anyways. I can understand why you did certain things and frankly, you're one bada** of a woman.

To have you as my mom and my best friend has been the best thing that has ever happened to me. So, Mom, now that I'm older, thank you, for everything.

Love,

Your Daughter

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An Open Thank-You Letter From The Heart, For The Soul-Sister Who Deserves It

Being 794 miles apart from your best friend can be difficult and tough to handle but somehow we make it all work and I could never thank you enough for still being in my life!

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Having a best friend to go through milestones and the ups and downs of life with is truly incredible.

I never knew that I would ever become so close with another person that was not family till I met you! You came into my life so unexpectedly and have been by my side ever since. Eight and a half years as best friends seems like a lifetime, but not when I have you by my side!

There have been so many highs and lows that you have been there for in my life. From losing animals, family members passing away and friends coming and going from our lives. You have always been the shoulder I could cry on and the one I could turn to for any advice. No matter if I needed advice on a boy, another friend, my crazy family or just life in general. There will not be a day that goes by that I will not be thankful that I have you as my best friend! God truly gifted me the sweetest, kindest and loving human to be my soul-sister!

Thank you for bringing me into your life and letting me experience so much with you! We are apart of each other's families and forever will be. We go to family dinners, parties, events and more together! You will be my maid of honor one day and I hope yours! My future children will call you Aunt Sam and never go their lives without having you in them!

This past year and a half have been tough being so apart and missing out on so much within each of our lives while being away at college yet here we are still as close as we have always been! When we get back together it is as if we were never apart and I love every second we have together! Getting to see you while being home from school during breaks is a gift and a blessing all in itself! Yes, going to different colleges and making new friends can be extremely hard at times but I am glad to know that even at the end of each day I can still call you up on the phone will anything on my mind and you will always be there!

There is not another friendship out there that could compare to the one that you and I share! Our friendship, sisterhood, and love for each other and one another's family grows with each day! I truly cherish you and the kind spirit in which you are!

As we enter into the next semester of our second year at college I hope you know that you are loved and cherished by not only me but many more of those in your life! Having a best friend like you in such joy, thank you for never leaving me!

I love you dearly my soul-sister!

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