The Holidays: Joy And Pain
Start writing a post
Lifestyle

The Holidays: Joy And Pain

Supporting friends and family whose lost loved ones this holiday

66
The Holidays: Joy And Pain
Ben White on Unsplash

As Christmas draws closer and we’re all surrounded by the scent of peppermint and the cheerful sounds of Christmas music, it’s easy to forget not everyone shares our excitement. Christmas for me is the happiest time of the year. My family from near and far gather together to celebrate the holiday and there’s a stirring in the air that’s only caused by our mutual excitement. We send out countdown text messages to each other, and we tag one another in memes with silly messages to express how much we miss each other.

For many people (myself included), this is the happiest time of the year, but to someone who has lost a loved one, it’s the saddest.

My social media newsfeed is filled with three main categories: family pictures, romantic issues, and people going out. Beyond the multitude of baby and food pictures, moving past the pet pictures and cat videos, I can’t help but notice the number of friends and family that are in mourning this holiday season. As one of the few people my age that hasn’t lost a close loved one, sometimes giving comfort and finding the right words is hard. As a nurturer, seeing people who are grieving this holiday and being unsure how to comfort them caused me to investigate how I can show support to each of them.

I’ve narrowed it down to four main categories: keeping in touch, willingness to listen, setting up a memorial, and talking.

Keep in touch: One of the most thoughtful ways to show someone you care is to be there for that person. If you can’t be there physically reach out via phone or even social media, just to let them know you’re there for them if they need somebody. Sometimes the sweetest touch is to go old school and hand-write a letter. This adds a personal and intimate touch, showing this person they are a priority and that you took the time to write this.

Willingness to listen: Somethings people just need to vent. Have a willing shoulder, be the listening ear for someone without passing judgment. Above all, be the solace that person is seeking. Don’t rush the conversation or try to dominate or determine the way the conversation should go. Allow them to steer things if they’re up for talking.

Set up a memorial: A unique present to give this holiday to someone that grieving is an online memorial. Having pictures and shared stories of their departed loved one can help them feel like their family member was a part of this holiday. Want to go old school? Set up a physical memorial or plant a tree in their loved one’s honor.

Talk: Don’t avoid mentioning someone’s passed loved one. I’m guilty of this, a lot of us are, we avoid bringing up people and topics that make us sad. But sometimes doing this doesn’t allow people to heal, they feel people have forgotten about their loved one. Remember the times you shared with that person or stories they shared with you of their loved one. Don’t be scared to mention them, it’ll probably make your friend smile and show them how much you care.

Above all, be there for the person, show them you care and they are loved and cherished. You’re already in the right direction by reading this.

Report this Content
This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
the beatles
Wikipedia Commons

For as long as I can remember, I have been listening to The Beatles. Every year, my mom would appropriately blast “Birthday” on anyone’s birthday. I knew all of the words to “Back In The U.S.S.R” by the time I was 5 (Even though I had no idea what or where the U.S.S.R was). I grew up with John, Paul, George, and Ringo instead Justin, JC, Joey, Chris and Lance (I had to google N*SYNC to remember their names). The highlight of my short life was Paul McCartney in concert twice. I’m not someone to “fangirl” but those days I fangirled hard. The music of The Beatles has gotten me through everything. Their songs have brought me more joy, peace, and comfort. I can listen to them in any situation and find what I need. Here are the best lyrics from The Beatles for every and any occasion.

Keep Reading...Show less
Being Invisible The Best Super Power

The best superpower ever? Being invisible of course. Imagine just being able to go from seen to unseen on a dime. Who wouldn't want to have the opportunity to be invisible? Superman and Batman have nothing on being invisible with their superhero abilities. Here are some things that you could do while being invisible, because being invisible can benefit your social life too.

Keep Reading...Show less
Featured

19 Lessons I'll Never Forget from Growing Up In a Small Town

There have been many lessons learned.

70779
houses under green sky
Photo by Alev Takil on Unsplash

Small towns certainly have their pros and cons. Many people who grow up in small towns find themselves counting the days until they get to escape their roots and plant new ones in bigger, "better" places. And that's fine. I'd be lying if I said I hadn't thought those same thoughts before too. We all have, but they say it's important to remember where you came from. When I think about where I come from, I can't help having an overwhelming feeling of gratitude for my roots. Being from a small town has taught me so many important lessons that I will carry with me for the rest of my life.

Keep Reading...Show less
​a woman sitting at a table having a coffee
nappy.co

I can't say "thank you" enough to express how grateful I am for you coming into my life. You have made such a huge impact on my life. I would not be the person I am today without you and I know that you will keep inspiring me to become an even better version of myself.

Keep Reading...Show less
Student Life

Waitlisted for a College Class? Here's What to Do!

Dealing with the inevitable realities of college life.

132394
college students waiting in a long line in the hallway
StableDiffusion

Course registration at college can be a big hassle and is almost never talked about. Classes you want to take fill up before you get a chance to register. You might change your mind about a class you want to take and must struggle to find another class to fit in the same time period. You also have to make sure no classes clash by time. Like I said, it's a big hassle.

This semester, I was waitlisted for two classes. Most people in this situation, especially first years, freak out because they don't know what to do. Here is what you should do when this happens.

Keep Reading...Show less

Subscribe to Our Newsletter

Facebook Comments