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50 Reasons Why You Should Believe The Earth Is Flat

Wake up, sheeple.

Alice Minium

Aug 03, 2017

Christopher Newport University

142426

50 Reasons Why You Should Believe The Earth Is Flat

Nerd Heist

Wake up, sheeple. I'm just going to say it to you straight.

The Earth is flat, NASA is a conspiracy, and you should really really hate Neil deGrasse Tyson for some reason. The globalists are coming for you. I've scoured the deepest depths of the internet to find out what the real facts are. Contained within this article is all the proof you need.

Watch out for the New World Order. You might want to delete your browser history after reading this. You don't want Them knowing you've discovered the truth.

Now here's the truth. This is how we know the earth is flat.

1. God's Flat Earth Truth And Reality.

2. Space.

3. The sun.

4. Balloons.

5. The sky.

6. Why don't satellites cross in front of the moon?

7. Math is Illuminati.

8. Buildings don't tilt.

9. GPS doesn't work over the ocean.

10. They're called airPLANES, not airGLOBES.

11. Horizon = horizontal. Wake up, sheeple.

12. Oceans are Illuminati.

13. The Equator is Illuminati.

14. The UN is Illuminati.

15. Lake Baikal is Illuminati.

16. Explain this.

17. The Sun is not 93,000,000 miles away, it's right here next to this airplane.

18. The Soul-Lure System.

19. Globes are atheism and the occult and paganism and also Illuminati.

20. This makes so much sense.

21. This makes even more sense.

22. This makes the most sense of all.

23. Thank you for telling me that's a graphic illustration because I totally would have thought it was a real picture.

24. This is catchy and sounds true most likely.

25. Um. This is escalating really quickly, dude.

26. ...These are perfectly reasonable claims.

27. This photo is all the proof I need.

28. Oh no. Not the Sun cult thing again.

29. Wow, this is a really good point.

31. Okay I get it.

32. Please stop.

33. Okay seriously, please stop.

34. Why won't it stop.

35. Guys this has gone too far.

36. Guys can anyone hear me

37. Please get me off the internet

38. I'm done

39. I'm done for the day

40. I'm done forever

41. Oh my God, it just keeps going.

42. I don't...

43. Dude, it's so convincing

44. My life is a lie.

45. My brain hurts.

46. Do you feel woke yet?

47. Because you should.

48. It is my pleasure to bring you this wholesome content.

49. From the darkest depths of the internet, right to your door.

50. Now if you've actually read this far, you should probably be done with the internet for the day.

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.

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Recommended for you

50 Reasons Why You Should Believe The Earth Is Flat

Wake up, sheeple.

1. God's Flat Earth Truth And Reality.

2. Space.

3. The sun.

4. Balloons.

5. The sky.

6. Why don't satellites cross in front of the moon?

7. Math is Illuminati.

8. Buildings don't tilt.

9. GPS doesn't work over the ocean.

10. They're called airPLANES, not airGLOBES.

11. Horizon = horizontal. Wake up, sheeple.

12. Oceans are Illuminati.

13. The Equator is Illuminati.

14. The UN is Illuminati.

15. Lake Baikal is Illuminati.

16. Explain this.

17. The Sun is not 93,000,000 miles away, it's right here next to this airplane.

18. The Soul-Lure System.

19. Globes are atheism and the occult and paganism and also Illuminati.

20. This makes so much sense.

21. This makes even more sense.

22. This makes the most sense of all.

23. Thank you for telling me that's a graphic illustration because I totally would have thought it was a real picture.

24. This is catchy and sounds true most likely.

25. Um. This is escalating really quickly, dude.

26. ...These are perfectly reasonable claims.

27. This photo is all the proof I need.

28. Oh no. Not the Sun cult thing again.

29. Wow, this is a really good point.

31. Okay I get it.

32. Please stop.

33. Okay seriously, please stop.

34. Why won't it stop.

35. Guys this has gone too far.

36. Guys can anyone hear me

37. Please get me off the internet

38. I'm done

39. I'm done for the day

40. I'm done forever

41. Oh my God, it just keeps going.

42. I don't...

43. Dude, it's so convincing

44. My life is a lie.

45. My brain hurts.

46. Do you feel woke yet?

47. Because you should.

48. It is my pleasure to bring you this wholesome content.

49. From the darkest depths of the internet, right to your door.

50. Now if you've actually read this far, you should probably be done with the internet for the day.

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No, I can't help you.

1. When a customer wants to return a product, hands you the receipt, where is printed "ALL SALES ARE FINAL" in all caps.

2. Just because you might be having a bad day, and you're in a crappy mood, doesn't make it okay for you to yell at me or be rude to me. I'm a person with feelings, just like you.

3. People refusing to be put on hold when a customer is standing right in front of you. Oh, how I wish I could just hang up on you!

4. Having the same conversations over and over again! To be honest I really don't even want to talk to you right now, or have this fake ass smile on my face!

5. Always having to have a smile on your face. I promise I'm not as happy as I may look!

6. Customers not understanding that sometimes, mistakes happen. I am a human being, we all mess up sometimes!

7. Having the boss from hell, it's their way or the highway! Even though I did my job correctly and efficiently, if I don't do it the exact way you do, I'm a piece of shit.

8. Having coworker who don't help out, who bend the rules just enough to screw you over.

9. Having to be at work after closing because a customer is taking forever and half! Not like I'd like to go home or anything!

10. Having shitty hours and more shifts than you asked for. Just because we don't have enough workers, doesn't mean I want to pick up every shift that you cant cover, oh great boss of mine!

11. Not having time for a social life. It gets old saying, "I can't I have work..." Every day of the week!

12. Having that lazy costumer who can't do anything for themselves... no please I'll get that, it's no problem at all!

It's just my face, I swear.

1. When you meet new people, they automatically assume you hate them or are rude.

2. People are constantly asking you if you're OK.

3. After being friends with someone for a while, they confess to you, "I thought you were so mean when I first met you," or, "I thought you hated me."

4. You get told to smile more, but they don't understand how scary that would be.

5. You're always labeled as seeming "judgy."

6. Passing a friend with your RBF in full force and not realizing you just shot them a death glare.

7. Being sarcastic, but everyone thinks you're outright rude.

8. Not knowing how mean you really look until you see a picture of yourself in resting face.

9. Your apologies never sound sincere because of your emotionless face.

10. Your "mad face" scares you.

11. And, lastly, people are constantly asking you if you are happy or having a good time because you look bored to death.

Please hold your blonde joke.

1. "Is Elle Woods your spirit animal?"

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