Dear Right-Handed People, We Hate Left-Handed Desks
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Politics and Activism

Dear Right-Handed People, We Hate Left-Handed Desks

It's time to send these things back to the storage closet once and for all.

Dear Right-Handed People, We Hate Left-Handed Desks
Joseph Martin

It’s time to send all of those left-handed desks back to the dusty storage closets from which they came. It’s nice that you care enough about us lefties to design special desks for us, but let’s be honest: we absolutely hate them.

First of all, for some reason you always shove all the left-handed desks up against the left side of the room. News flash: That is a terrible idea.

Now we have to choose between bumping our elbows into the wall or sitting halfway off of our seats just so that we have a little wiggle room to write our notes. If you’re going to make these desks, at least put them somewhere where we can breathe!

Also, what’s the point of a left-handed desk anyway? The only real difference between them is which side has the armrest, and we couldn’t care less about that.

We have to deal with minor inconveniences like that all the time; our fingers get in the way of our cameras; we struggle against can openers, and even our shirt buttons are lined up to frustrate our clumsy right hands.

We can live without an armrest if it means we can be comfortable when we sit down to take our notes.

Not to mention the millions of questions you get asked when you sit at one of these desks on the first day of class. Yes, I am left-handed.

Yes, I know that lefties used to considered evil back in the old days. No, I do not care that your great uncle from Kalamazoo happens to be left-handed. Please, we just want to be able to choose a seat on the first day without drawing attention to ourselves.

You know what we absolutely love? Classrooms with tables. Every lefty ever lets out a little squee when they walk into a classroom and don’t have to deal with desks.

No shoving yourself in a corner and getting asked a million questions. We can just sit down and be a part of the conversation like any normal student. Why can’t we have more classrooms like this instead of those uncomfortable little deathtraps.

So here’s what I propose: it’s time to get rid of the left-handed desk. It was nice knowing you, but you simply don’t do your job well enough to keep around.

It’s the time of the tables, the wonderful friend of righties and lefties alike. We’ve struggled for long enough, and now it’s our time to come to the table.

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.

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