I Do Not Want To Watch Hannah B's Season Of The Bachelorette

Hannah B Is The Next Bachelorette And I Will Not Be Watching

After watching the season finale of The Bachelor, I have some thoughts.


The other night was the second part of the season finale of The Bachelor and at the end, they announced that Hannah B is going to be the next bachelorette. Now, I already had heard some rumors about her becoming the bachelorette, but I thought the producers had put out feelers to the general public and once they had graciously come back to their senses and realized there was a plethora of options from Colton's season to be the next bachelorette that aren't Hannah B, they would change their minds.

Well, I was wrong.

Before I get on my soapbox, I just want to say I think Hannah B is a great person. Like, I'm sure she has a ton of friends that love her. She seems funny and cool, and maybe I would hang out with her in another life. Not to mention, she looked fantastic last night.

But, the Roll Tide of it all.

I just don't believe that she is bachelorette material. It takes a certain kind of person to deal with the schmucks that go on that show, along with breaking up with all of them one-by-one. You have to be able to make a decision, articulate your feelings well and be able to stick to your guns, all while entertaining all of America. Someone like JoJo. Probably one of the best bachelorettes that show has seen. Interesting, personable, funny, smart and strong-willed. Also, so fucking gorg. Now, after watching that little preview of our girl Hannah last night, I am just a little concerned about her having to deal with 25 more weird, cringey guys.

Can we talk about the rap?

I literally had to close my eyes at one point because it was too hard to watch. And I get it, she's kind of thrown into this, she hasn't been properly trained yet, as she did not hesitate to tell us 10000 times. But, come on. She can't even say what she's looking for in a guy. Every question Chris threw at her was somehow not answered. Where were her notecards?? I thought pageant queens thrived on this shit???

I hope Chris has some Advil because he will be carrying the entire show on his back for this season.

They had so many great options too. Tayshia! Hannah G! Caelynn! DEMI FOR BACHELORETTE. I would have cried tears of happiness if they chose Demi. There definitely would not be any boring episodes, that's for sure.

And this wouldn't be fair if I didn't throw her a bone after dragging her for an entire article. I think she has started getting groomed and she has already grown for the better. Did you see Chris throw her that softball of a pageant question on Women Tell All and she just hit it out of the park? Old Hannah would have totally gotten into it, but Bachelorette Hannah really gave a nice, proper answer. And if I was thrown into everything like that on live television, God knows what would come out of my mouth.

Listen, I feel for the girl. She's a little quirky, a little awkward, and maybe it'll take a few tries to get everything running smoothly for TV. Maybe my hatred is for the show in general, and how many cringe-worthy moments they force us to watch in a span of two hours. And I say "force" because no matter how many times I say I'm going to stop watching, somehow my ass is on the couch with a glass of red wine in my hand every season premiere, ready to suffer through it all over again. Season after season I fall for their editing magic, surprised every single time that the cast member I was SURE would win ends up crying in the back of a minivan on their way home. I guess you could say I have amnesia. Or I just like to suffer. Who knows, but here's to another season of experiencing the horror together!

Except for "Bachelor in Paradise."

That show is fucking amazing.

Report this Content
This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
Health and Wellness

This Survey Shows How Quarantine And Drinking Relate, And I Can't Say I'm Surprised

"5 o'clock somewhere" is more of a guideline now than ever.

As it stands, and my friends and I are finally 21. We're extremely excited to be able to go out to bars and "get lit" as the kids say, but due to the pandemic, all of our plans have been put on hold. We'd rather wait and go when it's safe than risk spreading the infection and hurting our loved ones. So, we've all been quarantining apart, getting on the occasional wine zoom call. This made me wonder if anyone else our age were doing the same thing.

Then, I discovered this survey: We Surveyed Millennials And Gen Z About Their Quarantine Drinking Habits — Cheers. Here are 3 things that I discovered through the survey results.

Keep Reading... Show less

5 Easy Summer Mocktail Recipes You Can Make With Items You Probably Already Have On-Hand

Keep these drinks in mind next time you're visiting your local farmer's market — you might want to grab some extra mint and limes.

With Summer 2020 in full swing comes the addition of many fresh fruits and vegetables to brighten up your dinner plate, but also your glass! Farmers markets are my personal favorite place to look for produce that is in season to make fun mocktails with.

Keep Reading... Show less

5 Ways To Celebrate The 4th of July — Without Fireworks Or Social Gatherings

We created a list of things to do since social distancing may create a dent in our typical, planned traditions.

With the Fourth of July on Saturday, the usual tradition of popping fireworks, grilling out, and being surrounded by family has been modified due to the pandemic. Whether you're a loner or surrounded by family, there will most likely be some changes to your celebrations.

For weeks on social media, people across the country have been complaining that they have been subjected to fireworks going off at all times of the night into the early morning. This has sparked concern and questions about why this is happening and how are people even obtaining the fireworks.

Keep Reading... Show less

Carb And Cheese Lovers, Unite — These Are The Best Mac And Cheese Recipes On The Internet

Whether you need to get through the current pandemic or want to spice up your Fourth of July celebrations, these mac and cheese recipes will do just that.


My favorite food is mac and cheese, and it always has been. All it requires is noodles and cheese — it's so simple to make. Although it's my favorite, it can also get kind of mundane because it's such a simple recipe. This, of course, has led to many people all over the world experimenting with the American staple.

With our lives currently being turned upside down due to the pandemic, a lot of people are seeking comfort. These are scary times, and in order to make it day-to-day, we need to have our favorite foods as a standby. These recipes can also be used during your celebration of the Fourth of July.

Keep Reading... Show less
Health and Wellness

17 Things To Make You Feel GOOD This Week

Because some purchases are just necessary.

Y'all, we're struggling. You don't even have to tell me, I know. What a mess we're all in, right? This year is not going how we planned and the world has turned into one giant struggle bus. I guess you could be super philosophical about everything happening for a reason, but sometimes life is just hard.

There are plenty of ways to bring yourself out of whatever rut you're in. You could go for a run, have a snack, or read a book. Or, if you're really looking for an adrenaline rush, go shopping. This is obviously not going to solve the world's problems with one swift click of the "checkout" button, but hey, it may just give you the little boost you need today.

Keep Reading... Show less
Health and Wellness

I Wore A Butt Mask Every Day For A Month, And It's Officially Essential In My Daily Self-Love Routine Now

Thirty days later, my booty's as smooth as a baby's.

- Blissfully unaware that butt-care beyond squats was even something I should be considering in my self-care routine, I tried one of Bawdy Beauty's butt masks for the first time a month ago.

- I've never really given my butt a second though till I took a look at improvements that could be made with the mask — if one of the hydrating, firming, detoxifying, or brightening masks in the kit I received could either smooth out cellulite or tone my skin a bit more, I wasn't going to complain.

- Each Bawdy Beauty sheet mask comes in an individually-packaged sheet, soaked with a serum I massaged into my skin after removing said sheet. The clay butt mask comes in a convenient stick format I simply draw on to my skin and leave to set for about 10 minutes before hopping into the shower.

- I set a goal of committing myself to butt-care every day for one month. Between the regular use of sheet masks, clay masks, and their CBD Butt Balm in between, I didn't have many expectations.

- I thought the whole concept may just be a gimmick, but my butt has never looked so toned in my life, and the cellulite I had is almost completely gone. I wear one every single day when I get the chance.

I'm incredibly skeptical when it comes to marketing ploys and gimmicks in the beauty world. I'll be the first cynic to try out the latest serum on the market every influencer is raving about just to negate every grandiose claim it makes.

Keep Reading... Show less

Friends, you don't have to be quarantined to use a personal massager, you know? Because, sure, quarantine made for a lot of extra quality time with yourself, but no matter what phase of the reopening process you're in, it's normal and actually healthy to take care of your sexual needs on your own.

Keep Reading... Show less

5 Books I Didn't Realize Are About Gay Women

If you read primarily LGBTQ fiction, then this list might help to expand your TBR list.

Photo by Ketut Subiyanto from Pexels

Frequent readers of LGBTQ fiction might feel like they're reading the same book over and over again, with few exceptions.

Most of these books were on my TBR list for months and I didn't realize they were about gay women until I was reading them, hopefully, this list of books can interest you in expanding your reading material and seeking out different stories.

Keep Reading... Show less
Facebook Comments