So your parents decided to cut the cord. Maybe there never was a cord in the first place. Regardless, the fate which befell your childhood was public access and made in Canada. If you're like me, you've had it with all these privileged snobs flexing on you with their iCarly references.
It's time to raise a glass to the little guy! Down with the bourgeoisie!
1. Qubo.
You've searched for answers, but nobody seems to be able to tell you what exactly Qubo was. Over the years, you've become convinced it wasn't even a real channel. All that remains are fractured images—Jane and The Dragon, Rescue Heroes, something about penguins in space, and… Babar? Who cares. All you knew was that if you stayed up late enough, you got to watch He-Man!
2. Those weird religious channels.
Let's be honest, you really only stuck around for Veggie Tales.
3. Watching More M*A*S*H and Mary Tyler Moore than the average middle schooler…
When you talk about the shows you watched growing up, you might fit in better with a room full of 60 year olds than people your own age. Every once and a while, you catch yourself humming the Cheers theme, or wanting to toss up your beret in the middle of a crowded intersection. Who can blame you for being cultured?
4. Not understanding all these Spongebob memes.
Ah, yes. Spongebob. You know of him. You've certainly seen him on backpacks and beach towels and things. But what exactly is an "Alaskan Bull Worm"? Why are people screaming "CHOCOLATE" at you all of a sudden, or TyPiNg LiKe ThiS?
5. Being able To Watch TV At A friend/relative’s House was an event.
You knew who had the biggest screen. You knew who had Disney XD and who just had Disney. Your friends were calling for you to come play outside, but you were planted on the living room couch binging enough Kim Possible to fit in with the rest of the 1st grade.
