Okay, let start looking at the manner differently, shall we?
Sorry, you can't play on the baseball team for your high school, because this is a boy sanctioned sport. Oh, no, no I am not saying that you can't play sports here. You can play softball, it is basically the same thing, but it is the girl sanctioned sport.
Okay, here is the thing. I am all for girl power. And embracing your inner femininity. However, I don't believe that the way to get that is by being exposed to a tight nite group of a "girls only" club. Everyone has different reasons for going Greek. Maybe you want to get involved with social activities on campus, party, or if you were like me, wanting to be around strong and inspiring women. People who drive you to work harder and do more in the world. Having friends both in sorority life and fraternity life, I often heard different reasons why the joined. However, for the most part, it all came down to one word: family. Everyone I spoke to wanted to have somewhere where they felt inclusive and belonged. For freshman new to the world of college and away from home for maybe the first time we all were looking for somewhere to belong.
So, here is the thing, if Greek life is truly about finding somewhere where we belong, then why are we saying, "Sorry, this is an all-girls club," or "Sorry this is the boys only room." Being exclusive doesn't make something more special. It makes it, well, one-sided. Greek life is basically a club. So, why should we be excluded people who are actually interested in joining? The whole requirement process is so intense, that if someone actually says, "Yes, I want to join a sorority, but I identify as male" then why are we telling them no. That they have to go over to the boy's side.
You want to join a house that makes you feel comfortable that you feel like you belong. For me, I never felt like I belonged to my sorority. I felt like an outcast throughout my time in the house. I poured my heart into the social committee, philanthropy works, making the cutest gifts you can imagine for my little, but I never felt like I was met for my house. I made some best friends and that was all great. But, the truly inspirational people that I hung out with and got what I had hoped for from Greek life, where the boys who lived across the fence from our house: the frats.
Yes, frats have their reputations. Their bathrooms never seem to be clean, they haze and can act so rude to girls. Yeah, well, wake up call, that is everyone. Your gender isn't going to be that defining reason why someone acts a certain way. And through my own hazing experience at my sorority and seeing their true colors, I never felt at home there. But take me to my best friends live out any old day and I felt like I was at home.
I would often joke about rushing their frat and how I wish I could. But truth is, that was never a joke, I was always full on serious. I may not be able to relate to things the boys have been going through. The pressures of the society of being a man or how the world expected so much from them but shamed them at the same time, or the thrills of standing up when peeing. But I felt a connection there.
At the end of the day, we join Greek to build a connection, a home. If we all rushed with blindfolds on and spoke to people, we would never see if they are male or female. Instead, we would be choosing brothers and sisters only on their goodness of heart and who we build a connection with through recruitment. You can learn so much from someone of the opposite sex. You can get to see the world from a different perspective. In a group setting, that diversity is important. You want to surround yourself by inspiring people who teach you new things about the world. If we keep ourselves stuck in our "girl clubs" and "boy clubs" we are never getting that perspective we need in our lives. We stay one-sided and taking away someone else chance to feel like they belong. We all want a home, so why are we taking away someone chance to one? Sorry, you can't join the "softball team," but there is the "baseball team" it is basically the same thing. But here is the thing, we didn't want to play "baseball." We wanted to experience what you are.