My life over the past six years has been anything but what I originally envisioned it would be when I graduated from high school.

I've lived in an upstate NY dorm room with a lovely Korean girl whose legal name was not Marie but whose culture suggested taking an "American" name in preparation for studying abroad (I've never heard of Americans doing the same when studying in Korea). I've deflated under self-imposed pressure and doubt, more so after a breakup that my mind hyperbolized than my indecision about my major, and watched my dad avoid the waterlogged potholes in the road as he brought me back to Long Island.

I've been hired at my second-ever job to earn back the money I anxiously tossed at my computer screen during my first semester in college to make myself feel better (retail therapy is a real and dangerous thing). I've gone back to school a semester later, community college this time, and stayed only a year before realizing that the rushed, impersonal environment did not at all give me a sense of "home."

I've transferred to a four-year college without earning an Associate's in that search for community and sense of belonging. I've struggled with self-worth and ability as I entered the Honor's Program and earned grades no lower than a B, because I was the smart one, right? I had to excel. Otherwise, who was I really?

I've gone through three of the four courses in the program before finally accepting that what I longed to write a 40-page thesis about was not going to be embraced (though I do think "bisexual manifesto" was a rude way to describe it, Professor). I've dropped out of the program after taking the winter break to finally, truly confirm what I knew in my heart to be what would make me happy and fulfilled.

And now, I'm here. Six years later. One week of classes left to endure and then... graduation.

Should it be marked with a grand celebration? Should I feel proud of myself instead of just, "Okay, that's finally done"?

I'm not sure what I really feel. I know that, to some degree, I'm happy. It's been a longer journey than the standard four years, but I learned a long time ago that there is no set timeline for anything in life. Not for school, not for marriage, not for having a child. It all comes to the individual at its own pace and nobody should be shamed or looked down upon for not fitting a societal mold.

But I don't want a big party - I never liked events where I was the center of attention or cause for celebration. I don't want this transition to be a huge hurrah of energy and noise. I sort of just want it to pass by, peacefully and naturally, so I can continue moving forward into whatever new adventure lies ahead.

There will be challenges. There will be failure. There will be tears (because, against my will, I can be a crybaby). But there will also be learning, success, and growth, and I'm alright with all that mixed up together to make my future happen.

Thank you to those who have stood by me and supported me, especially when I really didn't believe in myself. I know that I absolutely would not be here without you, because you helped me see that I was capable and strong enough to make this happen.

I am a product of my environment, and I'm so lucky to have been raised in one that could see my worth even before I could.