I know way too many ladies in relationships that come to me with problems with their man because they go through their phone at night, without their permission, and find shit their man was doing.

Here’s the thing, you shouldn’t have to do that.

If they go through your phone, there is no trust in the relationship. Period. End of discussion. There is no argument because a man or a woman shouldn’t have to wonder what their significant other is doing on their phone. There should be a trust there where you can say, “babe who texted me?”

This trust takes time though.

It takes perseverance through the texts that will come to both men and women from their ex’s or jealous girls or guys. You should know that person enough to be comfortable with them. You shouldn’t ignore your phone because “you’re focused on them,” that’s bullshit.

You just want their full, undivided attention but you’re too afraid to say it. But girl, why are you afraid? They won’t know unless you say something. Speak your mind, because they (men and women) can’t read your mind.

Your partner doesn’t know what you’re thinking so when you have a dream they cheated, you can’t wake up salty... well you can, but explain why you’re upset. Don’t just ignore them until you feel better.

One of the biggest things I look for in a relationship is loyalty, honesty and trust. I’m gonna be an asshole some days, sorry not sorry. So are you. You have to compromise and take an L for their happiness sometimes. Like when they want sushi but you hate sushi.

Ladies, if you’re lying to your man about anything, why are you together?

What's the point of continuing a relationship filled with deceit and lies? Same with men, y’all are some sly dogs sometimes.

Y’all take advantage of us loyal girls; make us feel lesser. Why would you cheat?

Like trading Whataburger for two-day-old McDonalds. Not fair to you or her. If you don’t like labels, you should 100% voice that shit because if the girl is all over Facebook already and you’re uncomfortable, say something! And girl, if you like being shown off, tell him! He’s oblivious to that kind of stuff.

To help with this situation, try being more selfish. Don’t think about what they’re doing, where they are. First off, that’s a little insane. Don’t be unnecessarily clingy. You only have one life, don’t get it so wrapped around someone else’s and lose who you are.

Find someone you genuinely want to tell everything to and for them to be excited and support you and vice versa.

Your person will lift you up in any situation and be there for you. Be patient, don’t look for it and do not settle. I’ve finally taken my own advice, I will not settle until I successfully find the love my parents shared with each other.