Catholic grade school and public middle school are two completely different worlds. It's like Pawnee and Eagleton. Bikini Bottom and Atlantis. Earth and Fairy World. Catholic grade school was a world of its own, but I wouldn't trade my experiences in one for anything. Here are some things that resonate with Catholic grade-schoolers everywhere:
1. A side ponytail was perfect for every occasion
Movies? Yes. Ice cream social in the cafeteria? Yep. Cheetah Girls concert? Of course.
2. If the rubber bands on your braces weren't colored in accordance with the upcoming holiday, you failed.
Neon orange and black bands for Halloween screamed "I'm festive yet laid-back and I totally care if you think my navy Abercrombie cable knit sweater is clashing with my chestnut brown Uggs."
3. It was totally normal to have a boy ask you out through a Nintendo DS chatroom. In fact, it was preferred. (Chatroom A, obviously)
This actually happened. Hi Greg!
4. A bedazzled Motorola Razr was imperative to success.
5. Hard Tails needed to make an appearance on every dress down day before administration banned them for good.
RIP yoga pants.
6. Rolling the sleeves on your polo into even shorter sleeves was a sure fire way to gain popularity.
7. Drawing on your kilt with a black pen was cool.
Who cares if your mom paid $75 for it!
8. Your gym sneakers said a lot about you.
For example, my pink and white Nike Shox said: "I'm not interested in anything except the boy with matching blue and white Nike Shox who sits across from me in Social Studies."
9. The more Webkinz you owned, the better.
Sure all twenty-three of my Webkinz were malnourished, but I had a kickass above-ground pool in my backyard and fifteen exclusive items.
10. If your saddle shoe laces aren't barred, you can't sit with us.
No exceptions.
11. Wearing knee socks in below freezing temperatures was a much better alternative than wearing tights.
No matter what your mom said.
12. Ash Wednesday was a competition
Who has the best ash? Is mine still on my forehead? Does it actually look like a cross or does it just look like a thumbprint of a criminal?
13. Walking back from communion during a school Mass gave you the opportunity to show everyone your best strut.
14. Picking your confirmation name was an insane task.
Mary? Too overdone. Marguerite? I might not remember how to spell that. Lucia? Perfect.
15. Confession
Telling the priest that your last confession was "over six months ago" was basically the same thing as "definitely six years ago."
16. A tiny Vera Bradley pencil case was flawlessly suited for your millions of pencils, pens, colored pencils, highlighters, crayons and markers.
17. Suddenly having to use the bathroom when the only slow song came on at a cafeteria dance was perfectly acceptable.
18. Writing "Jesus" for test questions you didn't know, because Jesus is the answer to everything.
19. If all else failed, blame the CCD kids.
