January is no longer a frosty month just because of the weather. According to Cosmopolitan magazine, January is the month that more relationships break up than any other month. Therefore, January was named "National Breakup Month," proven by Facebook and Yahoo surveys. In fact, the UK recognized January 12th as their "National Breakup Day." One can only guess that these breakups are a result from holiday stresses and/or the seriousness of meeting families during holiday parties.
No matter the cause, here are some ways to get over a post-holiday breakup like a champ.
1. Delete Him.
No, seriously. Delete his number, unfriend him on Snapchat, Instagram, Facebook, Twitter (if you still use that), etc. I know you think you are a mature adult and can handle it, but I'm sorry to say you're not. You will see a picture of his night out, or some random girl in his Instagram post, and your crazy eyes will pop. Save yourself the anxiety (and dignity) and delete him before you text or 'poke' him on a night you've had one too many glasses of Barefoot Moscato.
If it's good enough for Elena Gilbert in Vampire Diaries, it's good enough for you. You would be surprised how liberating it is to be able to write your feelings down. Write angry letters, sad letters, or a funny joke you heard that day just write. By being in tune with your emotions, it will be much easier to accept where you stand and move on. Hey, you could even get really fancy by choosing to do a blog rather than ancient pen and paper!
3. Lean on your friends for support.
These friends will be the ones who will go out with you on a whim, choose you over their homework for a wine and movie night or hold your hand when or if you see him at a bar even though they have stresses of their own. Tell them how much you appreciate them and lean on them when you need to because they are here for you.
4. Get some fresh air.
The weather outside may be frightful, but so is isolation. Your bed isn't going anywhere, and neither is your pint of Ben and Jerry's, I promise. Go get some sunlight, enjoy the snow falling, listen to music and interact with the world. Being cooped up will make you dwell on your thoughts, and will only take longer to overcome. Some time with the outside world will help balance your feelings, I guarantee it.
5. Get rid of his stuff.
You can choose whatever method you like, but get rid of his stuff. My Big chose to neatly pack her ex's stuff in a box and give it to his best friend, while her roommate chose to destroy her ex's things. Ultimately, keeping that teddy bear or his shirt you sleep in is only going to induce a free-flow of memories, and your mind will play tricks on you by thinking they were all happy. Save yourself and just get rid of it all.
6. If you decide to rebound, take it slow.
You just got out of a relationship, so your heart is exhausted enough from doing flips and tricks as it is. Try to get to know yourself more by treating yourself to a new outfit with the money you would have used for his Valentine's Day gift, pouring yourself a glass of wine, going to see a movie by yourself (you finally won't have to share your popcorn) or reading an unusual book. A few random make out sessions won't hurt, but for the most part, try to just enjoy being single so you can mend.
7. Channel your emotions into working out.
Elle Woods taught us that exercise gives you endorphins and endorphins make you happy. Channel that anger into a new workout routine. Find something you like. By working out and gaining strength, not only will you feel empowered, but you will also calm angry moments and liven sad moments as well.
8. Cry when you need to.
There will be moments when you just really need to cry. To avoid doing a huge melt down in the middle of your microbiology lecture or Kroger because you see his favorite microwavable meal, just do it when needed. By building up emotions, you find yourself avoiding your problems. Stay in tune with how you're feeling, and if the Notebook is on ABC Family when you're switching channels and you haven't cried in a few days, maybe take some time and let it out.
9. Pamper Yourself
Take a bath, put on a cooling eye mask to depuff your cry eyes, and listen to some Adele with candles burning. Use scents like lavender that have aromatherapy benefits, paint your nails, do your makeup, wear a new dress, try that new makeup tutorial on YouTube. You deserve to relax and see your most beautiful self. Maybe even change your hair color or treat yourself to a massage (couples massages are overrated, anyways).
10. Find a new passion.
Take up knitting, dance lessons, spinning classes, volunteer work or a new project for work in order to find a new passion to dive into. This will help you discover hidden talents and appreciate your own strength.
I believe you will get through this and, actually, you're probably better off without him, Beautiful. It's going to be okay.