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12 Funniest Crimes That Were Actually Committed

As crazy as they may sound, these are all actual crimes people have committed.

Elisa Unique

Sep 19, 2023

National Writers Society

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Photo by Shourav Sheikh on Unsplash

With so much negativity in the news every day, it is refreshing to read about people committing the funniest and strangest crimes. From fast food being delivered to a lawyer's office without him ordering any to a man trying to pawn stolen jewelry in a store managed by the woman he just robbed, sometimes crimes are just plain ridiculous.

SEE MORE: 7 Laws In Georgia That Are, Well, Different

These are just 12 of the most hilarious crimes ever committed.

1. A couple discovered a burglar in their house after the burglar laughed at the husband's joke.

man in sunglasses laughs Photo by Brooke Cagle on Unsplash

Now I just wonder what the joke was and if it was really that funny to make a burglar laugh.

2. A man high on bath salts breaks into a house and puts up Christmas decorations.

man puts up christmas decorations after breaking into home Photo by James Wheeler on Unsplash

Well, I mean, at least now they don't have to put up their Christmas decorations.

3. A man reports thieves stole his cannabis plant and gets himself arrested.

old school rotary telephone Photo by Quino Al on Unsplash

In his defense, the police do say you should report any time a crime occurs.

4. A man's flatulence gets him charged with battery.

smelly gas in the air Photo by Mulyadi on Unsplash

Apparently, he farted and motioned towards the arresting officer. I imagine how bad the smell must have been for the officer to feel like he was attacked.

5. A lawyer gets pizzas and other fast food items delivered to his office after a stranger places the orders.

gooey slice of pizza Photo by Pablo Pacheco on Unsplash

If the lawyer doesn't have to pay for the pizza, is it really a crime? I mean, it's pizza!

6. A woman beats her boyfriend because he "finished" before her.

couple cuddles in bed Photo by Becca Tapert on Unsplash

Apparently, during sex, the boyfriend got off first and the girlfriend proceeded to beat him. Well, men, just be sure, if you ever sleep with this woman, let her finish first.

7. A man breaks into Pizza Hut and fries wings.

local Pizza Hut restaurant Photo by Saumya Rastogi on Unsplash

This guy was drunk and decided he wanted to fry some wings. So what does he do? He breaks into Pizza Hut. I mean, I guess that's logical.

8. A son robs his mom because he thought he could only be charged with burglary if done at night.

sunshine during the day Photo by CHUTTERSNAP on Unsplash

I just wonder what on Earth made him think you could only be charged with burglary at night? Like, how do you even get to that conclusion?

9. A man eats his own underwear hoping to beat a breathalyzer test.

underwear hangs on clothing line Photo by Esteban Bernal on Unsplash

I guess he thought the material of the underwear would take away the odor of alcohol. I mean, again, how do you get to that conclusion? And, more importantly, how do you eat your own underwear?

10. A woman tries to trade an Olive Garden salad for drugs.

Olive Garden restaurant commons.wikimedia.org

She went up to an undercover cop and offered to give him an Olive Garden salad in exchange for some drugs. Olive Garden salads are pretty delicious.

11. A Romanian Parliament member tries to bribe people with fried chicken.

fried chicken on metal grill Photo by Shardar Tarikul Islam on Unsplash

Now, it takes a creative person to use something like chicken to get votes. I guess he really loves chicken and figured his voters would too.

12. A man pawns stolen jewelry at a store managed by the woman he robbed.

jewelry with blue gemstones Photo by Arteum.ro on Unsplash

If you ever doubted karma, just read this story. Karma was definitely like "don't worry girl, I got you" with this woman and her thief.

25 Beatles Lyrics: Your Go-To Guide for Every Situation

The Best Lines from the Fab Four

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For as long as I can remember, I have been listening to The Beatles. Every year, my mom would appropriately blast “Birthday” on anyone’s birthday. I knew all of the words to “Back In The U.S.S.R” by the time I was 5 (Even though I had no idea what or where the U.S.S.R was). I grew up with John, Paul, George, and Ringo instead Justin, JC, Joey, Chris and Lance (I had to google N*SYNC to remember their names). The highlight of my short life was Paul McCartney in concert twice. I’m not someone to “fangirl” but those days I fangirled hard. The music of The Beatles has gotten me through everything. Their songs have brought me more joy, peace, and comfort. I can listen to them in any situation and find what I need. Here are the best lyrics from The Beatles for every and any occasion.

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Course registration at college can be a big hassle and is almost never talked about. Classes you want to take fill up before you get a chance to register. You might change your mind about a class you want to take and must struggle to find another class to fit in the same time period. You also have to make sure no classes clash by time. Like I said, it's a big hassle.

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Recommended for you

12 Funniest Crimes That Were Actually Committed

As crazy as they may sound, these are all actual crimes people have committed.

1. A couple discovered a burglar in their house after the burglar laughed at the husband's joke.

2. A man high on bath salts breaks into a house and puts up Christmas decorations.

3. A man reports thieves stole his cannabis plant and gets himself arrested.

4. A man's flatulence gets him charged with battery.

5. A lawyer gets pizzas and other fast food items delivered to his office after a stranger places the orders.

6. A woman beats her boyfriend because he "finished" before her.

7. A man breaks into Pizza Hut and fries wings.

8. A son robs his mom because he thought he could only be charged with burglary if done at night.

9. A man eats his own underwear hoping to beat a breathalyzer test.

10. A woman tries to trade an Olive Garden salad for drugs.

11. A Romanian Parliament member tries to bribe people with fried chicken.

12. A man pawns stolen jewelry at a store managed by the woman he robbed.

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The Best Lines from the Fab Four

And in the end, the love you take is equal to the love you make

The sun is up, the sky is blue, it's beautiful and so are you

Love is old, love is new, love is all, love is you

There's nowhere you can be that isn't where you're meant to be

Life is very short, and there's no time for fussing and fighting, my friend

He say, "I know you, you know me", One thing I can tell you is you got to be free

Oh please, say to me, You'll let me be your man. And please say to me, You'll let me hold your hand

It was twenty years ago today, Sgt. Pepper taught the band to play. They've been going in and out of style, but they're guaranteed to raise a smile

Living is easy with eyes closed, misunderstanding all you see

Can you hear me? When it rains and shine, it's just a state of mind

Little darling, it's been long cold lonely winter. Little darling, it feels like years since it' s been here. Here comes the sun, Here comes the sun, and I say it's alright

We danced through the night and we held each other tight, and before too long I fell in love with her. Now, I'll never dance with another when I saw her standing there

I love you, I love you, I love you, that's all I want to say

You say you want a revolution. Well you know, we all want to change the world

All the lonely people, where do they all come from. All the lonely people, where do they all belong

Oh, I get by with a little help from my friends

Hey Jude, don't make it bad. Take a sad song and make it better

Yesterday, all my troubles seemed so far away. Now it looks as though they're here to stay. Oh, I believe in yesterday

And when the brokenhearted people, living in the world agree, there will be an answer, let it be.

And anytime you feel the pain, Hey Jude, refrain. Don't carry the world upon your shoulders

I'll give you all I got to give if you say you'll love me too. I may not have a lot to give but what I got I'll give to you. I don't care too much for money. Money can't buy me love

All you need is love, love is all you need

Whisper words of wisdom, let it be

Blackbird singing in the dead of night, Take these broken wings and learn to fly. All your life, You were only waiting for this moment to arise

Though I know I'll never lose affection, for people and things that went before. I know I'll often stop and think about them. In my life, I love you more

Obviously the best superpower.

There have been many lessons learned.

1. The importance of traditions.

2. How to be thankful for family and friends.

3. How to give back.

4. What the word "community" really means.

5. That it isn't about the destination, but the journey.

6. The consequences of making bad choices.

7. To trust people, until you have a reason not to.

8. To be welcoming and accepting of everyone.

9. How to be my own, individual person.

10. How to work for what I want.

11. How to be great at giving directions.

12. How to be humble.

13. To be well-rounded.

14. How to be great at conflict resolution.

15. The beauty of getting outside and exploring.

16. To be prepared for anything.

17. That you don't always have to do it alone.

18. How to be creative.

19. To brush off gossip.

I have never been so thankful to know you.

Dealing with the inevitable realities of college life.

Don't freak out

Email the professor

Attend the first class

Keep attending class

Have a backup plan

Remember that everything works out at the end

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