"You've changed" is seemingly the go-to insult for people these days and more often than not, it comes out of the mouths of people that don't necessarily like the change they are seeing. It's as though changing insinuates that someone is fake, a traitor, or a criminal when in fact that's usually not the case.
Newsflash: you're supposed to change. It's a natural part of life. You're supposed to grow, develop stronger passions, try new things and show support for topics in life that you believe in. Contrary to what simple minded people may think, you should not be the same exact person at 25 as your were at 16. One would hope that you'd open your eyes, mature, and come into your own.
In the last three years I changed so much, I don't think I would even be friends with the person I was in 2014. Mind you, I was in no way a mean or hateful person. In fact, I was the extreme opposite back then. I was too accepting of everyone, never rocked the boat, and made sure those around me were happy and approved of me. As much as everyone loved the old me, I couldn't stand myself. I was always an emotional wreck, had so much anxiety, and didn't like or know who I really was because I was a human stepping stone. I tolerated everyone's crap, bit my tongue, and just tried to keep my life as comfortable and good as possible.
At the end of 2015, I realized it was time for something to change and that something was me.It was time to find myself and the person I'm supposed to be. I had to let go of some friends and family, take steps out of my comfort zone, and do a lot of self reflection. In that time I found my hobbies, my passions, my balance, and my truest self. I know, like, and love myself more than I ever have.
If you're feeling unbalanced, drowning in the person you currently are, and sick and tired of being sick and tired, it's time to change the channel. In the process of changing, finding, and loving myself, I learned a few valuable lessons along the way.
You find out who your real friends are
Not everyone will like the new and improved version of you. I noticed that the more I learned to like and value myself, the more some people disliked the person I was becoming. My true friends loved to see me standing my ground, being honest with myself, and discovering this new found confidence. Meanwhile, other friends didn't like the new me at all. I was too different. I no longer agreed with everything they said and I was losing my passive nature. What they disliked more was that I wasn't letting their disapproval phase me. My circle soon got smaller but better.
Someone's opinion of me is none of my business
There will always be people that don't like you or approve of you. If someone doesn't like me or is speaking ill of me, unless it's a real friend or family member that I'm close to, I don't even want to know what they said. People that know you the least tend to say the most and people that are jealous of you try to find your flaws. That's just how the world goes around. Instead of worrying about it and wanting to show people the good heart that I have, I just let it roll off of my back. There is no need to confront an adult and tell something they know they said. I just wash my hands of them and carry on.
My amount of control is limited yet powerful
I can't control what others say, do, and think but I can control my actions, reactions, and the positive things I bring into my life. I have the power to achieve anything I put my time to and no one can stop me unless I allow them to. Every morning I wake up, I have another chance to improve my life and the world around me. The ticket is to not dwell on anything from the past and set yourself up for a happier and healthier future. The cards are in your hands.
Unapologetically Changed
I'm now a person that makes her presence known, fights for what she believes in, and knows her worth. I no longer care if people like me and don't feel the need to foster relationships that don't bring me peace or joy. I will not apologize for the positive changes I have made or for upsetting people that only want me to do things their way. Yes, I've changed and I'm proud of it. Sorry, not sorry.
