1. Have friends.

At this point in the game, we can't help you with this one.

2. Find the Monica of your friend group.

DON'T host a Friendsgiving.

The easiest way is to not be the host. Convince your friend to be a host and do all the hard work. Or host at a friend's: offer to do all the invites and come over early to help with cooking.

Worst comes to worse, choose a cozy restaurant and do dinner there. No cooking, no cleanup, and all you had to do was text the people you love and pay $15 for dinner. Done.

3. Use the buddy system. 

Find yourself a hosting buddy. That way even if all your friends are a**holes and leave without helping with dishes, you have one person to help.

4. Don't do turkey.

Don't make a turkey—they're complicated and expensive. Cook chicken instead. Easiest chicken ever: Rotisserie from Meijer or Costco. If your friend complains: "That's like Fourth of July without apple pie--or Friday with no two pizzas!"--they can make the turkey.

5. Use the 1-1-1 rule.

1-1-1 rule: ask each guest to bring 1 beverage, 1 side dish, and 1 dessert. That way there will be a shit ton of food, everyone gets leftovers, and you don't have to buy any alcohol.

6. Google docs are your friends.

Whip up a google doc so six people don't bring yams--or a custard jam beef trifle. Make sure your suggested foods are all great at room temperature and/or put in a special note to have everything cooked beforehand. You do NOT want 10 people showing up expecting to use your oven.

7. Use real dishes. 

Help the environment by using the dishes and silverware you have. If you need more, ask friends to bring more! If you're worried about cleanup, see point #14. Remember you have a designated helper buddy: and presumably everyone you're inviting is a buddy too (in some way). You'll have dish helpers.

8. Make the day special.

From lighting a couple dollar store candles to having tablecloths and matching glasses, make a (tiny) effort to make the day look special. You don't need china plates. Just avoiding divorce and projectile vomiting is enough to make most people's day.

9. Poo-pourri. (Trust us on this one.)

People will be eating a week's worth of calories in one sitting. Your porcelain throne will be getting a lot of visits. You might want some Febreze or a scented candle or even plain matches. Just consider it.

10. Music can stave off awkwardness. 

Put on a playlist. Pandora or Spotify is great; it doesn't have to be fancy. Music does wonders for covering the awkward silences that inevitably pop up.

11. You are the boss. 

Ban politics. Ban sports. Ban anything you want to make the holiday an enjoyable one for you and your guests. It's your house, you're the boss.
If a guest breaks the rule: take a tip from an additionally loved TV show, and go light on the slaps. Believe it or not, it CAN be Thanksgiving without a little emotional scarring.

12. Thankfulness galore!

If you're all close, go around the table and each of you say a thing you're thankful for about each attendee. If that's too weird, just boringly share a general thing you're grateful for. Maybe stave off that one friend who declares he's thankful for thongs--unless you're that sort of friend group.

13. When it gets awkward anyway--have an activity. 

If you're worried conversation won't be enough, pick a couple conversation games. Apples to Apples, Cards Against Humanity, and This One Time I are all great fun.

if you want something you can stream, check out "A Charlie Brown Thanksgiving" for a big dose of nostalgia—or get a roll of sugar cookie dough, cookie cutters (dollar store or Amazon for cheap ones), sprinkles, and frosting, and make your own desserts.

For safety purposes we do not recommend football.

14. Enlist a cleaning crew. 

Ask everyone to help pitch in for dinner cleanup. Reward after: pie. Reward after pie cleanup: a drink and chatting while finally letting your stuffed slothful bodies remain motionless.

15. If you are a guest.....

#15: Show up on time. Unless you're a wizard. Otherwise, don't be that late guy.

16. Bring a present.

Bring a small thank-you gift to your host. Bonus points if it's treats or a beverage: you might get to enjoy it later.

17. Lastly, leftovers. 

Bring your own Tupperware if you want leftovers. Don't expect to use your host's!

Enjoy your Friendsgiving! After all: "It's Thanksgiving and we should not want to be together--TOGETHER."