Relationship breakups aren't taboo. There isn't this weird expectation to just let it happen and move on quietly as though nothing is happening. In fact, you're nearly obligated to run to the nearest ice cream aisle and purchase your body weight in the sticky delight. Your significant other's name becomes synonymous with odd gestures and the phrase "you-know-who." There's tens of thousand of songs and moves to take pity-infested solace in, knowing you're the not the pioneer for this gut wrenching experience. In fact, your platonic friends are even expected to step up and fill the void. Your best friend practically becomes your new partner.

But what about when the best friend was the one who broke your heart?

Yes, it can happen. The one person who you thought would have your back for always and forever can disappear in a moment's notice, leaving you feeling abandoned and broken. How you feel after the fact isn't really changed by how it happened either, mutual or not. Because when people ask you how they are, you'll still smile and say they're fine, even if you haven't spoken to them in weeks. You'll pretend to know what happened with them at the party last week because it's nearly an unspoken rule that you can't tell someone you're not longer friends- like you're violating the fundamentals of some ancient, sacred law.

Why this is, is unclear to me. Maybe it's because you've allowed yourself to be completely and irrevocably emotionally vulnerable with someone. You've shared some of the most intimate moments of your lifetimes together. There's never any judgment. The two of your simply exist together, harmoniously and eternally.

But then comes the moment when you don't, and I just want to tell you that it's okay. It's alright to miss someone you truly thought you'd spend forever with. It's okay to feel a bit mournful every time you hear their name or see them out and about. You showed someone else the innermost workings of your heart and you shared so many things with them, too. Everything from those dark moments and clandestine secrets, to those unforgettable times of pure bliss and happiness of being able to be your complete and total self in front of another human being.

Friendships can come and go just like relationships, and they can hurt just as much. When you go from knowing everything about them (and their family) to wondering if they even still live in the same apartment, it's okay to be hurt. It stings. It sucks. It makes you feel wounded, burned and forgotten,left to wallow in the burnt ashes of your once-was friendship.

But that's just how it is. You will recover from it. Some day, it might not feel like you can-- especially on those dark, horrendous days when someone brings up a memory of you two, or you visit a place once held sacred with one another. And I won't lie, you can think you're over it, but then something will happen and you'll want nothing more than to "accidentally" dial their number and divulge everything to them. But that's what's supposed to happen. Maybe you will, maybe you won't. But no matter what happens, you'll always have the memories and pictures, even if they cut you, and you bleed just a bit.

But you won't be sad irrevocably. It gets easier with time, just like a relationship breakup. So go ahead and cry out loud to that awful, off-tune song you guys used to sing in the car. Don't be afraid to look at old pictures and notes you have. Some day, it will get easier, and it will feel like something that was just meant to be- accepted and acknowledged. Because as Aristotle once wrote, “What is a friend? A single soul dwelling in two bodies.”