A couple of days ago my mom found a kitten in a tree. Yes, you read that right. A tree.
Naturally, I named her Willow.
In the six days that I've spent with her, Willow has graciously shed some light on several different issues surrounding ornery and spoiled kittens. She's managed to give me at least 15 scratches and has only pooped on me twice, and so naturally, I had to share my newfound wisdom with the world. Courtesy of Willow, I've compiled a list of five lessons I've learned from the rescued, five-week-old kitten that I'm sure she would point out to me if she could speak English.
1. Sleep is for the birds.
Willow's cage is in my room because I hoped this would brainwash her into thinking that I'm her favorite since our other two cats don't mind me very much. In doing this, I never considered the possibility of the horror that typically unfolds. Picture this: Willow and I are cuddled up, watching Netflix. Our fourth episode of "Scandal" has ended and it's already midnight. I'm ready for bed and I assume she is too, considering she's been out cold for two episodes. I quietly tip-toe her over to her cage and gently lay her on her bed.
As soon as I make it back to my bed and my head hits my pillow, it starts.
Non-stop, high-pitched meowing. Knocking over the food and water bowls. Banging on anything within paw's reach. Hanging upside down from the top of the cage.
Yeah. Let's just say she's not too considerate of my sleeping schedule.
2. Everything is classified as a toy.
Sure, that shiny ball of a cat toy I proudly purchased from PetsMart is cute... for a minute. But then it's the cup of water I have sitting on the table. Suddenly it's the cute sandals I bought a week ago and have coveted since. Even my hair can amuse the little fur ball for a few minutes. I can't tell you how many times she's chased my toes under the covers because she swore they were trying to play with her, too.
It's really cute until you realize you're out one pair of new and adorable shoes and the backs of your legs looked like you were casually mauled by a small bear.
3. Meal time is all of the time.
Cats are known for being relatively picky eaters. Yeah, not Willow.
On top of the dry kitten chow she has readily available at all hours of the day, Willow also enjoys to eat anything off of my plate. This includes fruit, vegetables, and the other night she even stole a cookie. How her tiny belly hasn't exploded I'm not sure, considering it stays full 98 percent of the time. Maybe it's her survival instincts kicking in again or maybe she just has a huge appetite. Either way, that cat can eat.
4. Arms are actually meant for holding kittens... Nothing else.
Who cares about the fact that I have three stove-top burners on, am loading the dishwasher, and am trying to answer a call all at the same time? Not Willow. She will stand at my feet and cry until I finally give in and pick her up. If I'm not fast enough, though, she sometimes likes to scale my legs, which is even better. What's one more scratch to the leg going to do, am I right?
The best part is that when I finally decide to appease her and pick her up because I feel bad that only five days ago she was stuck in a tree with no one to love her, she sits in my arms for a few seconds and wants down.
This whole ordeal could technically be a blessing in disguise, seeing as I'm the worst at multitasking, but to me, it just seems like a fire hazard... and a spoiled cat.
5. Cuddling is the best medicine.
Regardless of how irritating and destructive she was just hours before, there really is nothing better than climbing into bed at the end of the day and snuggling up to Willow and my favorite TV show. It's really been the best part of my week with her.
