How To Properly Use ChapStick

One Of The Most Impressive Things A Human Being Can Do Is Finish An Entire Tube Of ChapStick

It is the only thing more impressive than the creation of ChapStick itself.

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Mankind's most impressive accomplishments include inventing the wheel, walking on the moon, and, of course, the creation of ChapStick. The air outside is beginning to get dry, and thus, chapped lips are coming, and once chapped lips season begins, millions of poor souls will begin to suffer from the tragedy that is chapped lips. Luckily, we have ChapStick, and Burt's Bees, Carmex, Blistex, and plenty of other lip balm brands as well.

There is nothing worse than feeling your lips begin to dry up, signaling that chapped lips are in your not too distant future. Actually, there are probably many things in life that are worse than this, but it's still pretty bad.

ChapStick is a savior for the chapped, a larger than life hero conveniently available in a small tube at most local stores. Thank goodness for ChapStick (and other brands of lip balm, I guess.) I truly believe that the invention of ChapStick is one of the most important, groundbreaking, and impressive feats that mankind has accomplished.

However, the only thing more important, groundbreaking, and impressive than the creation of ChapStick, is someone finishing an entire tube of it.

I'm not sure if it's even possible to do this, and I'm starting to think that it might not be. Before it can be done, the vast majority of people will either lose the tube, or no longer need it because their lips are no longer chapped. Then, by the time their lips become chapped once more, the tube will then be lost, never to be seen again.

It is a vicious cycle, one that prevents us all from ever finishing our ChapSticks, and probably also helps lip balm companies sell more products.

If anyone has actually used up an entire tube of it from beginning to end, I wonder what life is like for them now. Did they stumble upon some sort of hidden code allowing them to understand the true nature of life and the universe? Did they open a gateway to another dimension with different laws that govern time and space? I think there is a very good chance that one of these events occurs when one finishes an entire ChapStick tube.

It has to signal some sort of mind-bending event releasing the most well-kept secrets of the universe. Nothing else really makes any sense.

If you have finished an entire ChapStick tube, you have my deepest and utmost respect. You have shown the ultimate form of perseverance, prevailing despite the odds of the universe being completely against you. You have shown that you know how to follow through with something, no matter what. You can now live the rest of your life knowing that you have accomplished what most never will.

Be proud of yourself, and make sure to tell everyone you possibly can that you have finished an entire tube of ChapStick. Make sure it's the first thing you say when you meet someone new, tell random people in the street who you have never even met, and put it at the top of your resume when you apply for a job, because they will be sure to hire you on the spot once they learn of your wonderfully impressive feat.

As of now, my lips are beginning to feel chapped, and I have just applied ChapStick to them as a means of combating this dreadful ailment. As I stare at the tube in my hand, my determination to use the entire thing has greatly amplified, and I am more determined than ever to finish the thing and unlock the secrets of the universe. But, who am I kidding? I'll probably lose it before the tube is even halfway gone.

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20 Fun Facts To Use When Introducing Yourself

As we embark on the semester, we are put on the spot in order to share interesting details about ourselves. This article discloses possible fun facts to tell others!
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After experiencing my first week of classes, I have learned that every student needs a handy-dandy list of fun facts about themselves to tell other people. Many professors use the first couple of classes to learn about their students, so you may need to think about who you are and how you want to introduce yourself to your professor and classmates. We all have that one go-to interesting fact about ourselves, but sometimes you just have to mix it up!

1. My favorite hobby is...

What do you do in your free time? Personally, I love to stay active! I am a competitive Latin dancer and enjoy teaching and taking Zumba classes, going to the gym, and hiking.

2. I love...

Is there something, someone, or somewhere that you love? What makes your heart ache? What do you miss when it's gone? I can say that I love my friends because I feel my most confident when I'm surrounded by those who love and support me.

3. I look up to...

Is there someone you adore? Who mesmerizes you? Who do you wish to learn from? After watching "A Ballerina's Tale," I discovered Misty Copeland. In 2015 she became the first African American ballet dancer to become the Female Principal Dancer at American Ballet Theatre. Her passion, grace, and strength continuously motivate me to better myself as an athlete and an individual.

4. This art speaks to me because...

Coco Chanel said, "In order to be irreplaceable one must always be different." This encourages me to always follow my heart no matter what. I will never follow society's standards and norms because they do not define me. Chanel's saying definitely influences my character and lifestyle.

5. A funny and/or embarrassing memory of me is...

When you make others laugh they want to spend time and make memories with you! Don't be afraid to embarrass yourself. You will come off as down to earth, easy-going, and loyal.

6. My siblings or lack thereof influenced me by...

I can go on and on about my brother, who is 10 years older than I. We have opposite personalities and despite the age gap, we're quite close.

7. My pet(s) are my life because...

Only sad people don't like hearing about furry creatures, even if your pets are slimy and slithering creatures all human beings enjoy hearing pet tales!

8. I'm afraid of...

Your personality can be revealed by your likes and dislikes, including the things that you fear. I am terrified of change and the unknown, hence, the future is an anxiety-inducing topic to discuss for me.

9. I am the way I am because...

What have you gone through in life that has shaped you into who you are today? Remember to be open minded and allow yourself to open up to your peers. You may be surprised by how others respond and/or what others have endured as well.

10. The most unusual item that can be found in your dorm...

This is a fun fact about yourself that can easily liven up an awkward conversation. Think about your quirks and differences! One item I have in my dorm is my teddy bear, Peter, whom I like to joke is my boyfriend.

11. My dream job is...

In college, "What's your major?" is a widespread question. Nonetheless, skip the boring statement of "I'm majoring in..." and go in depth on what your dream job is (hopefully your major factors in to this dream of yours).

12. My hidden talents are...

Angelina Jolie is a knife thrower. Kendall Jenner can produce bird noises. Amanda Seyfried can crochet and knit. Is there anything special you can do? Some people have rare and unique talents, maybe you can think of some hidden talents of your own!

13. My guilty pleasure is...

I will say it a million times: don't be shy when introducing yourself to new people! I'll start by divulging my guilty pleasure: Youtube's family vlogging channel, "OKBaby"!

Check them out: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCvUCbnwzySKgbKiB_...



14. Some activities on my bucket list are...


This is an easy way to grab people's attention and find others with similar desires as you. Be an adventurer! Go out of your comfort zone!

15. Talk about your best friend...

How would your best friend describe you? What do you love to do with your best friend?

16. Talk about an accomplishment of yours...

You are incredible and have achieved so much! Reveal something that you are proud of — show off a little!

17. This one time at my job...

Bosses breathing down your neck. Curious coworkers asking personal questions. Cursing customers who never leave you alone. Your job can be filled with tons of hilarious situations that can easily entertain a crowd.

18. During the summer...

Any scars with stories? Any summer flings? Any lessons learned from the tanning too long? Now that summer is over, disclose memories that can leave positive impressions on others.

19. I volunteer at...

Do you do any community service? Share a funny moment while you were volunteering. What did you learn while there? Would you continue?

20. [blank] is meaningful to me because...



What do you appreciate in life? What brightens your day? What makes you fall in love? What does someone have to do to make you smile?

Finally, remember to be outgoing! Reveal that three-mile smile and open your arms to learning about others. Spread smiles, love, and happiness.

Cover Image Credit: Pexels

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When You Decide You Don't Love Me Anymore

I'll forgive you.

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I never thought I would write this, but I feel like I have to: there will come a day where you won't love me anymore. This won't be a sad day, but instead a day I have waited for all along. You see, they all leave and that is perfectly okay. People may not be meant to be in my life for all of it, not in any of our lives but this is normal and although initially saddening it is a part of our lives and inevitably part of our journey.

When this time comes I want you to know that we did our best, that we were in fact in love once and that we had hoped it would blossom into a lifetime commitment but it didn't and I accept that and will respect you always. I know you did not wake up one day out of the blue and stop loving me, I know this feeling grew over time in your heart and that it was not something you planned on. I respect this.

You were the only person I trusted and the one I loved the most, but nothing lasts forever and I hope you can understand there is no animosity here and certainly, no stone left unturned. We just are not those kinds of people, we would have tried everything to keep our love burning bright and tried for quite a while to understand where the cracks began so that could fix them, it just isn't that simple. Love is a long complicated process, you know that and falling in love with me couldn't have been easy, I am misunderstood and stubborn as all hell and I am FULLY aware of that but that does not mean I didn't try to ease up on you, I promise I did my best.

I have always done my best to understand you, to make you happy, to keep the flame alive, but it has been extinguished. Love does that sometimes, it is there one day burning bright and then it slowly starts to dim with every fight, every unrequited "I love you" and every day passing by in which we spoke less and less about the things that mattered and more and more about worthless things.

This is all okay, it is a season of life, a part of our lives in which we do suffer but one we must grin and bear. I want you to know that I will always love and care for you, although it is now in a much different way, now we no longer look at each other with doting eyes and open hearts but instead with the freedom to let go and move on.

It is time for us to go on with our lives and find a new adventure, one that will light our hearts on fire instead of continuing to snuff our joint flame. You will always be in my memory and a huge part of my life that I once had but I accept that it's over and that time sometimes wears on things as it has worn on us.

You are the love of my life and that is truly the reason I must forgive you.

Goodbye, my love.

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