I've never really been one to have test anxiety, or at the very least, major test anxiety. I've always been the type of person to be calm and want finals to be over but I didn't really stress over them. I knew more or less what my grade for the class would be and that was good enough for me. This semester was different however, I was an inconsolable mess of panic over my finals. I had somehow convinced myself that I was going to fail everything despite the decent grades I had throughout the semester. Needless enough to say, this feeling of panic over finals was new to me.
So, here's what my finals consisted of: one paper and two tests that were all more or less due on the same day. I had an entire week between the last day of class and my finals to study and work on my final paper for my conversational Spanish class. It sounded like plenty of time and I did study and work on that paper throughout that week. Maybe it's because I felt pressure of needing a specific GPA or maybe having an entire week between classes and finals just gave me too much time and I psyched myself out. I think the stress was a combination of both of these things.
So, how bad did this stress and anxiety over my finals get? Well, despite having a solid "B" average in my classes, I was scared to death that I would end up with a "C". I panicked so much about this that I was having nightmares about missing the tests and having anxiety attacks while in the dreams. These were not fun experiences, and I even woke up the day of my finals from this type of nightmare and was so panicked that it took me longer than it should have to realize that it was, just a dream.
Once on campus that day, I was still panicking and reached the point of being resigned to no longer caring about studying and all I wanted was my day to be over. My first final was biology and it was at eight o'clock in the morning. This was not fun for me at all, but I somehow managed to get through the test. Afterward, I went home, took a nap, and studied for my next exam. When I got back to campus I turned in my paper and went to the second exam. I was sure I would fail this test because this class was probably the hardest one I had all semester. After that test, I went home, about to burst into tears from the stress and relieved that it was over. At that point I just wanted to forget that college was a thing for the next three weeks.
All that was left was to wait for my grades to be posted. Final grades don't get posted for another three days as of my writing this, but I did end up with a "B" in biology, and the test I was sure I failed, I actually got an "A" on that. I won't find out how I did on my paper but that was for the easiest of my classes so I'm not concerned. So, I guess there is a moral to this story: don't panic over finals, it'll just make you miserable and you'll do fine as long as you study.
