I am a feminist. I know undoubtedly that I stand on the side of feminism, and I am proud to be supporting this cause. Though with my background and who I am as a person, sometimes the specific question can be one that leaves me feeling uncomfortable. 

I have dealt with my fair share of males, overcompensating, rude, un-feminist, males. There are lots of them out here in this world, and I always tend to surround myself with the worst of the bunch. So I have a roommate who is a male. He makes homophobic and racist jokes and is generally kind of intolerant about a lot of things. 

The first time I met him, I was trying to stay on good terms, I was already living with him and I didn't want to get off on the wrong foot. However, he made an anti-feminist joke that sit really poorly with me. I don't remember exactly what the joke was, but I remember feeling uncomfortable even having to listen to it. He must have noticed the discomfort on my face. He turned to me and asked, "Wait, are you a feminist?" 

This wasn't the normal type of question, usually it's asked by females in more of a, "You're a feminist, right?" type of way. But this was a loaded question. He wanted me to say no. In the eyes of most men, feminism is a bad thing. It's taking away their writes and instead giving something more to the females of the world. It typecasts men in a certain light that they don't enjoy. And while this is something I could write a whole different article on, I was still faced with this question. 

I thought about it for a little while even though I knew the answer. I was a feminist, I am a feminist. But something about the way he was looking at me told me that I should say no. That if I told him I was a feminist I would be ridiculed for it. I also knew that if I said no, I would feel guilty on a personal level. Saying no would have it's own set of consequences. I would be aiding in the stigma that feminism is bad, instead of talking to him about it and making a case for him to believe feminism could be a good thing. 

So I went for a middle ground and a wavering, "Kinda." It wasn't the strong stance I had always wanted to make, but I wasn't denying it either. He laughed, made another joke about how feminism is dumb, and continued from then on out to joke around with me about it. 

In the future I stood my ground more, never laughing at his jokes, and always telling him when he was making mistakes. Though he still treated everything as a joke, I could feel better knowing that I was standing my ground and making more of an effort to the feminist cause. 

I'm not sure if he'll ever completely understand that feminism isn't a bad thing, but it felt more important to stand up for what I believe in. Don't let people walk all over you, stand up for yourself and if you think something is wrong, say something about it. 

When asked if you're a feminist, smile and say, "Yes." Don't let anyone make you feel bad for wanting something better for yourself and the females of the world.