"Are there even any GOOD guys out there?" "Why can't I find a wholesome Godly man?" - two questions I hear from my college girlfriends all the time. The answer to the first one is - yes. But they are few and far between. The answer to the second one is - have you ever thought maybe you had something to do with it?
See, in our extremely feminist driven country right now, the physical and emotional aspects of a woman are brought to the forefront, but the spiritual aspect is left hidden, unspoken of, and quite frankly deemed irrelevant and unimportant. And that's where we're lost. Because women ARE made for men and men ARE made for women.
But we've become so focused on the individual physical and emotional strengths of each that we lose the commonality and the actual way we're meant to work together. As a result, women throw aside their own strengths of emotion, heart, sensitivity, and grace in order to create a facade of manly strength and power that nature has intended solely for men, which just leaves men robbed of their responsibility to be a man.
As I'm sure many of you have a strong opinion about this topic already, I want to make some things clear - I am all for celebrating the beauty, grace, intellect, and strength of women. But when feminism turns into this mean, nasty, in your face, demand for power, sheer independence, and entitlement solely due to the fact that we are female, I turn away.
Because we are made for men and men are made for women, we each have roles we need to lead in.
God didn't take Adam's third rib closest to his heart because Adam and Eve were equal. He did it because women are called to nurture and hold a man's heart - while the man is called to protect the woman. Two very different roles that work simultaneously together.
Because of feminism today and our over-sexualized world, man cannot protect the woman, they don't know how. And the woman doesn't hold the man's heart and nurture it - therefore the man is never truly fulfilled in the intention God has for a real man and woman.
Men are robbed because they don't know what true love feels like. They have the instinct to protect - but when they are constantly told and demanded to be equal to their significant other in all aspects, they have a wall up that leaves the insecure part of love guarded. Which is why women rarely see a man embrace his feelings or be vulnerable. And women need and crave that emotional openness and vulnerability, yet will never find it until they understand that true feminism is found through a man.
I'm seeing this right now with my current boyfriend who is humble, strong, honest, open, and overall a man of God. Before him, I was always guarded around men. I acted all badass, strong like I never needed a man. (Which, girls, you don't - but real men have something special to offer.)
Because he fulfills the roles nature calls him to as a protector, companion, leader, and rock, I've found the walls I built crumbling and this inner femininity shining through. Parts of my femininity that I never really cared to acknowledge because I was too busy being this world's version of feminine: tough, too good for you, etc.
But with him, I'm humbled and slowly understanding the different roles man and woman are naturally called to.
As a result, I'm not only opening up to the grace of being a woman but I'm also seeing the innocence, heart, and sheer beauty that we all possess as women, which leaves me feeling even more authentically beautiful and confident.
You will never truly feel like a woman and be fulfilled until you have God and your husband to nurture and love.
So women - be women as nature has called you too. Comfort, inspire, nurture, understand, assist, and love. And men - screw what the world is attempting to do with your manhood. Lead, protect, persevere, and preserve the beauty, feminity, and grace of women.
