To The Father That Never Took The Time To Truly Know Me

To The Father That Never Took The Time To Truly Know Me

It wasn't about anybody else, but me, your kid.

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This is one of the hardest things I have ever written but I have spent most of my teenage and young adulthood fearful of what could happen to me, because of you. So, here's what I wish I could have said if you or anyone around you had taken the time to listen to me.

For me, it was about principles. All my memories of you are absolutely tainted in a horrible light, because you showed me you don't have remorse to say whatever you feel is right, you let your own ego get in the way of every single relationship. Even the one with your own daughter.

You compromise feeling for what you feel is factual, forgetting or maybe catapulting past what it truly means to have said or done the things you feel are appropriate. I wish you could've done better for both of our sakes.

The things that hurt me the most are what you'll never know or see me do, I never felt safe inviting you to anything because I never knew what was going to happen. That instability cost us more than you could've ever tried repairing, even if you ever had.

I never wanted anything from you, I never asked for more money than what was originally offered. Nobody did. It was never about the money for me, it was never about the money for anyone else but you.

Finally, I was always my own person. My thoughts are unequivocally my own in, at least, the subject of paternal rights, you have never been someone I wanted to guide and care for me.

At least, I hope now that you legally have no reason to have a tie to me, you can afford the things you feel you never got in life. I know you feel as if I cheated you out of something, but I was just your kid, that's all. Here's to hoping all involved will now be happier without each other.

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To The Dad Who Didn't Want Me, It's Mutual Now

Thank you for leaving me because I am happy.
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Thank you, for leaving me.

Thank you, for leaving me when I was little.

Thank you, for not putting me through the pain of watching you leave.

Thank you, for leaving me with the best mother a daughter could ask for.

I no longer resent you. I no longer feel anger towards you. I wondered for so long who I was. I thought that because I didn't know half of my blood that I was somehow missing something. I thought that who you were defined me. I was wrong. I am my own person. I am strong and capable and you have nothing to do with that. So thank you for leaving me.

In my most vulnerable of times, I struggled with the fact that you didn't want me. You could have watched me grow into the person that I have become, but you didn't. You had a choice to be in my life. I thought that the fact that my own father didn't want me spoke to my own worth. I was wrong. I am so worthy. I am deserving, and you have nothing to do with that. So thank you for leaving me.

You have missed so much. From my first dance to my first day of college, and you'll continue to miss everything. You won't see me graduate, you won't walk me down the aisle, and you won't get to see me follow my dreams. You'll never get that back, but I don't care anymore. What I have been through, and the struggles that I have faced have brought me to where I am today, and I can't complain. I go to a beautiful school, I have the best of friends, I have an amazing family, and that's all I really need.

Whoever you are, I hope you read this. I hope you understand that you have missed out on one of the best opportunities in your life. I could've been your daughter. I could have been your little girl. Now I am neither, nor will I ever be.

So thank you for leaving me because I am happy. I understand my self-worth, and I understand that you don't define me. You have made me stronger. You have helped make me who I am without even knowing it.

So, thank you for leaving me.

Cover Image Credit: Pexels

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16 Things To Get Your Dad This Father's Day

Shopping for men might be one of the hardest things ever, especially when it's for your dad.

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I've never met a woman who actually enjoys shopping for a guy unless they already have a gift in mind. For every birthday, anniversary, Father's Day, and everything in between, women genuinely dread trying to figure out yet another gift.

I think guys are hard to shop for because most guys aren't traditional and they don't voice their wants when it comes to material things, most of the time. Therefore, shopping for your dad is by far one of the hardest tasks.

What do you get the man that literally gave you life and has provided for you all these years? You're too old to just draw a card that says, "Happy Father's Day, Dad! I love you!" You're also too broke to buy something super nice.

Fret no more! In honor of Father's Day coming up on June 16th, here are 16 things you can get your dad this Father's Day:

1. Baseball style hat 

A dad hat as a Father's Day present, what a concept!

2. Echo Dot

This is honestly a present the whole family can enjoy.

3. A nice phone case

Your dad, if he's anything like mine, probably has an old and busted Otterbox on his phone. Break him of his habits and switch that for a nice leather case this Father's Day.

4. Cufflinks

Help your Dad look extra after getting him some nice cufflinks he can wear to work. (Disclaimer: this gift is very cliche but I'm sure your dad will love anything you give him.)

5. Apparel from your school/future school

This one is for my college students- past, present, and future. Get your dad a t-shirt with your school's mascot on it and not only will he love it, but you can make sure he reps the best!

*Go Noles!*

6. Portable charger

I'm sure everyone could use one of these.

7. Yeti/Yeti-style tumbler

For boat days, when he's grilling at the family barbecue, or even for work, this gift can always come in handy for your dad. The possibilities of what to fill it with are endless.

8. Tickets to a sporting event

Dads love sports, so what better gift than some hockey tickets for the local team that you can actually afford? Or maybe even tickets for when his favorite baseball team comes to town? You'll be the favorite child for sure.

9. Cheesy Mug(s)

This worked when you were a kid and you're still young enough to pull this off.

10. A tie(s)

If your dad is the professional type, I'm sure he'd adore a tie you picked out! He'll be able to think of you every time he wears it and he'll definitely be matching because you can also show him which outfit to wear it with!

11. His favorite beer, liquor, etc.

Dads and beer go together like peanut butter and jelly. If you are of age, pick up a case of your dad's favorite brew, or a bottle of his favorite adult beverage this Father's Day. After all you've put him through over the years, this will be much needed.

12. A DIY redeemable craft

If you're feeling extra lovable, make dad some sort of redeemable coupon book for running errands or mowing the lawn. Maybe, just maybe, you're still young and broke enough for your dad to love it!

13. A nice shaving kit/toiletries bag 

Every man could always use a nice bag to carry his bathroom stuff in, especially if a shaving kit comes inside.

14. A nice cologne

Every man could use a nice cologne that smells great, too.

15. A shirt with a cheesy Dad saying or sporting something he loves

I have never seen a Dad not love a tee with his favorite sports team across the front, or even a tee with a cheesy dad joke. My dad personally has many of both. Invest in one this Father's Day, I'm sure he'll love it.

16. A gift card to a sporting goods/hunting/fishing store (or whatever he likes)

This enables your dad to pick his own gift, so this will ensure that you got him something he wants in the long run.

I hope this helped and gave you some inspiration. Happy shopping and Happy Father's Day to all the amazing dads out there!

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