Nine out of 10 times, whether people admit it or not, our moods are directly related to things we have zero control over.
Other people’s moods, traffic, rain, a bag grade that’s in the past, something not going exactly how we had envisioned it. 9/10 times, we let a bad mood consume our day and become a pattern that is completely unavoidable with a new mindset and a re-framed perspective of what is actually important, or what is actually worth the negative energy.
There are also always those "in-between" periods. The in-between days, stretches of cold weather, weeks before breaks, that seem to lack excitement, energy, or anything that gives us motivation. It makes it easy to fall into a redundant pattern of dullness, or negativity. It is almost like we forget that those dull, in-between periods, are worth just as much as the big ones, and we have just as much control of how we are soaking up those moments, as we are the "big" ones.
First things first, who the HECK cares what people think of you. If something does or doesn’t make you happy, follow what you want. The funny thing is, everyone says that yet we forget to follow it. When you know exactly which choice will or will not make your time enjoyable or give you happiness and the only thing holdin’ you back is the opinion of someone else that will be completely irrelevant in 24 hours… who cares. There is a difference between being selfish and solely caring about yourself, and then there is being respectful yet content with doing what sounds appealing—do that.
Secondly, avoid selfishness. Whether it is you, whether it is who you are surrounding yourself with or it is the person cutting you off on the freeway—avoid it. If there is one thing I learned that can make both you and everyone else around you miserable, it is a selfish mindset or pattern that somehow gets twisted into being okay, or just doing what makes you happy. There is a distinct difference. Doing what makes you happy doesn’t affect the people around you, being selfish does. When you think the whole world should be dropped for you, there is a problem, and it is not only going to bring you down, it’s bringing down the people you’re expecting to drop the world at their feet for ya…believe me, avoid that.
Fourthly, just be a decent human being. Everyone has a concept of what their actions are going to result in, what their mood is going to result in, how their words are going to affect someone else. Before you act, speak, or do something you know is obviously a negative/unpleasant one, think about it. Think about if you had someone acting/saying/being that way to you and how you would react. Chances are if you wouldn’t be happy they sure won’t be either—so prevent it. Really is as simple as that, just being a kind, decent human.
Lastly, be present. Put your phone down, look around you, take in the rain or the sunshine, listen to who is confiding in you, give honest feedback, be a soundboard—just be there, in that moment. I read a quote once that said, “a man who dares to waste one hour of time has not discovered the value of life,” and it has stuck with me ever since. Whether it is the saddest time, the happiest time, the most stressful time, be present. Be the best version of yourself you can be, and give all you have to offer for that specific moment. Be in the moment with what you are feeling and what is going on, and don’t waste away the moments you can never get back again.
Be there. Nothing lasts forever, so learn how to break through those negative moods, and make the most of those days and moments you do have. Smile more, laugh more, care more, be kind, and be present. Soak it all up when you have the chance to.