Here is the first week of Spring 2018. A beautiful day in Oswego, NY at 33°. As Spring comes forward I am reminded of what it means to have an emergence of life. The best type of soil is one that has compost or has been burned recently. From death and decay rises the sprouts of something new and reborn.
On this note, how can I overlook the lasts that the firsts emerge from?
Some lasts we will not be able to remember. Like the last time you were carried as a child or the last time you ever thought about that one person. Other lasts we can remember clearly and identify as lasts. In February was my last hockey game as a SUNY Oswego student. . This past weekend, March 18, was the last time I would make the trip from Connecticut to Oswego, maybe as just a student, maybe forever. In 51 days from the publication of this article will be the last time I walk campus grounds as a registered SUNY Oswego student. In 42 days from the publication of this article will be the last time I attend a class at Oswego.
Quite a few lasts will be coming my way, but with the burning of these lasts will allow the growth of firsts. The first time I will not be preparing for school between breaks. The first time I will be able to call myself independant and self reliant.
Do not get me wrong. My three years here were amazing. I have met people that will be with me forever. I have made memories I will cherish. Has anyone mentioned the sunsets here are incredible? I am thankful for those at the Compass that I work with, thankful for those at Johnson Hall and the Resident Life and Housing staff. There is not any other school that I could have gone to that would have given me such an amazing experience such as this one.
Nostalgia hits hard when an ending is so close.
If you are looking for a point to this article, it is simple. Embrace every moment, any of them could be an ending to something else. By reveling in any simple moment, you are able to become connected with those around you and forge stronger bonds. The people make the place, you make the place.
This includes trusting people. I had not been comfortable with the idea of putting my largest insecurities in another’s sweaty palms. I spoke to a good friend of mine who was cheated on in a past relationship. We were talking about how it was difficult to slice open our chests to let others see the beating, vulnerable heart. I stopped mid-sentence, because we were both talking about closing ourselves off and never opening up again. This was the wrong approach as we would be carving ourselves to be shells of potential. I stated that we both needed to keep ourselves open to any possibility and be ready to trust and hurt once more. This would not be another last that we would create, a last relationship or a last heartbreak. We both need to continue to plow our way forward, to keep planting those seeds of firsts.
To move forward, we need to burn the field behind us. It helps produce the best crops and new beginnings.
