I have always grown up with humility at the front of my mind; both of my parents have always displayed immense humility, so it is kind of a family theme. The thing is, though, I think I took that overt humility too far in my mind. I couldn't make the distinction between humbling myself and putting myself down; I thought to be humble meant assuming that I was never as good as my peers, that it meant I had to always say yes when my friends needed help, or that I had to be responsible for all my friends' problems.

Spoiler alert: That behavior is severely harmful. I went through steps to be better and take care of myself, and yet I still wasn't feeling 100%. I thought that I just needed to stop putting myself down, but being truly healthy isn't just about not comparing yourself to others - it's about caring for yourself.

For my birthday this past year, my sister got me a bunch of funny gifts. Like breath-spray that's supposed to make going to the gym more enjoyable. I don't know why she picked out a box of self-affirmation cards, but for some reason she added that to the birthday presents. At first, honestly, I thought the idea was lame. I wasn't self-absorbed and I didn't need any of that "lame" self-help I'd seen on Pinterest. But a few months ago, I decided to open my box of affirmation cards. The rules for the cards were simple - take a random card and read the words aloud to yourself. What I've found to be so amazing is that the quick phrase is really effective. It didn't feel cheesy or embarrassing, and I found that a lot of the time it was exactly what I needed to hear. I realized that these cards and phrases are mostly just encouragement - which was exactly what I never thought I needed to give myself. I needed to learn to encourage myself, and these cards were helping me see that.

I'm willing to make the assumption that we all like to be encouraged by others. I know, personally, when others tell me I'm doing a good job at [fill in the blank] it makes me feel really confident and happy. What I've come to learn is that we need to also be self-sufficient in encouragement. Not only do we need to surround ourselves with encouraging friends, but we need to make sure to remind ourselves how valuable and awesome we are!

Oh, subtle plug here, but if you're interested in the cards I mentioned, you can find them here!