I Am Not A Typical Girl Who Likes To Talk About Feelings

I Am Not A Typical Girl Who Likes To Talk About Feelings

Society thinks that we can't go 30 seconds without sharing our latest heart throb and sob. Some of us really struggle to be vulnerable and share our true selves.

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I just learned the concept of what "color" I am. Do you know your color? I am a blue - meaning I am passionate, have a heart that enjoys sharing love and caring for others, and have a lot of feelings and emotions to give. This is true. I feel everything. I base my emotions off of the vibes of others and feel deeply for others hurt, happiness, and struggles. I feel so much and feel so hard when it comes to my personal emotions but I cannot open up.

I have been confronted a lot in this past year about my life and how I am feeling. We all hate talking about mental health but it's serious. I have gone through the most difficult year of my life regarding my mental health. I don't deal with change well and like to hide my stress behind happiness and being with others. With a lot happening in my life, I have noticed people knowing what's going on but not understanding why I don't share more and why I don't dive in deep.

Why don't I?

I have some amazing friends who share everything. They open up to me about their lives and their feelings and I feel so blessed that I have friends and people in my life that want to share their heart with me. I, on the other hand, stay surface level. It takes me so long to uncover my real feelings. I like to keep bottled up because I think if I share too much, none of my thoughts and opinions will be biased and will stay untouched. But it's not fair.

Girls love to do what?

Gossip, talk, cry. "Typical" right?

That is a HUGE stereotype of young girls and women in our society.

Society thinks that we like to blab all day about gossip and other women and we can't go 30 seconds without sharing our latest heart-throb and sob and don't get us started on emotions. We will cry for days over cute puppies, hot guys that aren't available and a terrible heart-break.

Yes, some of this may be true - but also true for men as well. And for the most part, that is a very slim side of our society.

We as young females go through more emotions than you could think of thanks to stress of school, families, relationships, career opportunities, money, self-worth and so many other relevant things that can make us feel uncomfortable, moody and not ourselves.

I flat out struggle with coming clean and getting my emotions off my chest. People that struggle with sharing their emotions want you to know....

Just because I don't share everything doesn't mean I am happy all of the time

Social media can really influence this. I struggle with balancing my social media. Travel, fun events, and cute coffee dates can put out an image that really isn't sharing the REAL you. I really do love being happy and sharing joy but that doesn't mean that I am not struggling and don't have those insecurities.

Being vulnerable scares me

I love when people are vulnerable to me. But for some reason, it takes me so long to open up. I want you to know where I am coming from and the feelings I have but it will take me a while to get it out. Push me. I love being challenged. I need friends and relationships that push me to come clean and be the best version of myself. Sometimes, with so much bottled up, it can be hard to be our best selves.

I am really good at brushing things off and making things seem like NBD

It is a BIG DEAL! Why don't I think it is?? Emotions are a huge deal but I am so good and putting them on the back burner and when my heart is really hurting blaming it on something else or pretending it's not there.

But, with that, I can work on it. I can work on things that make me better at sharing my feelings, even if it's not with others. It could start with journaling and praying. A lot of my thought is able to escape by writing. Praying is also an amazing way to get all your thoughts and feelings out to someone that has no judgments.

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10 Bible Verses for Self Esteem

Sometimes you need to search for inner strength and find your own self worth.
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We all get those days that we just don't feel good enough for anything. Everything is going wrong. For me, I go to the bible to read the words of God. His personal dialog for us is filled with encouragement, hope, and lessons we can learn from. Here are my top ten verses that are uplifting and impacting when at the lowest of lows:

1. Philippians 4:13:

I can do all things in Him who strengthens me.

2. Psalm 46:5

God is within her, she will not fall.

3. Proverbs 31:25

She is clothed with strength and dignity, and she laughs without fear of the future.

4. Psalm 28:76

The Lord is my strength and my shield.

5. 1 Corinthians 25:10

By the grace of God, I am what I am.

6. Romans 5:8

I loved you at your darkest.

7. Psalm 62:5-6

Only God gives inward peace, and I depend on Him. God alone is the mighty rock that keeps me safe, and he is the fortress where I feel secure.

8. 2 Timothy 1:7

For the Spirit God gave us does not make us timid, but gives us power, love, and self-discipline.

9. 1 Peter 2:9

But you are a chosen race, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, a people for his own possession, that you may proclaim the excellencies of him who called you out of darkness into his marvelous light.

10. 2 Chronicles 20:15

The battle is not ours, but God's.

Cover Image Credit: chinadaily

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'Love Yourself' And 'Be Yourself' Is Easier Said Than Done For Girls At Any Age, But We're Trying

Being yourself is the best option you can do for yourself.

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Growing up everyone hears the words, "love yourself," "be yourself," "don't worry about what others think," or "you shouldn't care what people say about you." the list is endless.

For girls, at any age, it's hard to do any of that. Especially in today's society of social media, girls are always being told how they should act, not in the exact words of "you need to do this" but in a way we don't always pick up on.

They follow the fashion trends or any trends in general really. They've always cared about how many likes they can get for any picture they post on their Facebook or Instagram.

When it comes to me, however, I never really cared all that much. When I was younger, I was never the type who really cared how others saw me or what they would say about me. However, that all changed once I was brought into new surroundings, that's when I started to care what people thought.

I have learned though, about other people and most importantly, myself. I've learned that regardless, how you portray yourself anywhere, on or off social media, people are going to think and say what they want to and there's nothing you can do about it.

Actually, I lied, there is, live your life how you want and don't worry about what they say.

Thankfully I have found and continue to find the right people to call my friends. It's important to surround yourself with people who truly love you. Most, if not all, my favorite people are those who I've met while dancing at Mishnock Barn, some I have met at school and others I have met at work. I love everyone I know, they have all helped me discover who I am, as well as who I want to be.

They allow me to be myself no matter how weird I am.

I found my confidence, well kind of. I have found it through my friends as well as music. I've noticed that whenever there's music playing (doesn't matter where; school, work, or anywhere in public) I start to dance. I stopped caring how weird I look. luckily , for me I have great friends who tend to join me when I dance, so I'm never looking "stupid" alone.

Granted. I'm still figuring myself out, I have time. We all learn something new about ourselves everyday. I continue to find my confidence and what I want out of life. I'm just the type of person who follows her heart and her gut feeling. I'm still learning who I am as a person. I am also the real true friends are in my life, but what's life if you're not learning?

Like Mac Miller said, "People change and things go wrong, but just remember, life goes on."

Mac also said, "Be you. You'll be fine." This speaks loud and clear to me. This is my reminder that as long as I'm being myself, I will be fine because if you're being yourself you'll attract the right people. Even if people don't like you for who you truly are then that's okay, it'll all work out in the end.

I've learned and I continue to learn that I need to live my life for myself and not for anybody else.

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