No, for real. I mean it this time. I don't need you anymore. I thought I did for the longest time. I thought that my whole life depended on your friendship and whether or not you liked me. I thought that you were the sun and life revolved around you. I would stand up for you when people questioned your moral compass or choices that you made.
But not anymore. You hurt me one too many times. I know that I am better than this. I'm tired of always being your second choice, regardless of what it is you're choosing between. I'm tired of being the "pity" friend or the person that you only hang out with when no one else will.
Maybe those weren't your intentions. Maybe you really did value our friendship on a higher level at one point. I'll never really know your true thoughts or feelings about me, and quite honestly, I don't really care. If our friendship meant as much to you as it did to me, then you wouldn't have just stopped talking to me. You could have fixed what was broken and you chose not to.
That hurts, you know. Being dropped by one of your closest friends bites you with more force than you thought was possible. Regardless of your reasons, I know I deserved better than this.
I hope that one day you wake up and realize what you did. I hope you realize that you had one of the most amazing people you'll ever meet right in front of you, dedicating their time and energy to you. I hope you realize how much of a jerk you were when you didn't even say thank you or took advantage of the friendship. One day you'll realize you made a mistake and you'll want to come back, begging for forgiveness and trying to make amends.
Maybe by then, I'll be able to forgive you. Maybe then I'll let you back in my life. But not right now. Right now, I'm saying I don't need you. Right now, I'm not sure I want to trust you again.
So, I hope you learn a lesson. I hope you take away from this that you can't keep treating people the way you do. They'll get tired of it and want to stop fighting for a friendship that you don't seem to care that much about.
I don't hate you. I never will. I hate the things you did sometimes but I'll always hold a special place in my heart for you. I just need to move on from something that was doing more harm than good, and I hope you understand. I'm upset. I'm mad.
At times, I think you're a horrible person, but I know at one point you were always there for me. You were the shoulder I could cry on. You were the friend I'd call when something good happened. You were my best friend for so long that it feels weird not talking to you. But I realize that you don't deserve my tears.
Maybe this isn't a goodbye and maybe this is a wake-up call for you. Whatever it is, I hope you enjoy life. I hope you're doing everything you want to do. I hope you're really, truly and genuinely happy because I know I am.
