One of the biggest lessons that I've learned over the years is that you can't live for people's acceptance. Grammy award winning artist Lecrae puts it this way: "If you live for people's acceptance, you will die from their rejection."
I often come across people, including myself, that are acting a certain way in hopes to be accepted by someone else. The problem with this is that many of us are still rejected the acceptance we are seeking. And even if we do gain the approval of others, what does it actually mean? We had to change how we acted or who we were in order to be accepted, so are they really accepting us, or are they accepting who we are pretending to be?
In simplest terms, you can't please everyone. Living for the approval of others is a destructive road that you don't want to go down.
Believe it or not, people can tell when you're being fake, too. You may not realize it, but they do. That's why it's utterly important to be unashamed of who you are and what you stand for. Don't change who you are in order to gain the acceptance of another person or group of people. This is a huge issue in the college setting, and it's only going to get worse if we don't sit back and look at the root of the problem.
"Life is a cage, a prison to everyone's approval,
fight for acceptance and struggle so you don't ever lose it,
but living for their acceptance has got us stressin',
insecure people obsessed with leaving impressions." - Lecrae, Free From It All
Another lesson that I've learned is that I am alive for a purpose greater than my own. I am not here to gain the acceptance of others. I'm here to live a life that is pleasing and glorifying to God. If I said I don't constantly screw up, I would be lying. But no matter how much I screw up, God still loves me. And no matter how much you screw up, He still loves you, too.
The same thing can't be said about the people we interact with on a day-to-day basis. How much they like you most likely changes based on how you act. And while I wish the world wasn't like this, it is. The fear of losing friends or not fitting in is bigger than the fear of being someone that you aren't. We are too scared to be ourselves because that might mean risking your friendships with people.
The idea of being rejected is scary, I get that, but we need to realize that it's a part of life. Sure, "it's a part of life" probably isn't what you want to hear, but it's the truth. You can't please everyone. So be you! If people don't want to be around you because of who you truly are, let that be their loss. You wouldn't want to associate yourself with that type of person anyways!
Instead of hiding our insecurities and our lives, we need to embrace it. Trying to cover our insecurities will only make it worse when the cover comes off. Not only that, but taking the time to hide something only stresses you out more. That stress can uncover other parts of your life that you didn't want someone to see. It would be a never-ending cycle of failing to gain the approval of others.
If you live for people's acceptance, you'll die from their rejection. Be true to yourself and let the faithful friends you deserve come into your life.
