I Don't Know Where I'm Going And I'm Okay With That

I Don't Know Where I'm Going And I'm Okay With That

"Not all those who wander are lost." - J.R.R. Tolkien

I'm a college freshman (almost a sophomore, but that's an existential crisis for another time), and I have no idea where I'm going in life. It's scary, but is it really so bad? Sure, it can be stressful not to know where you're headed quite yet, but it won't kill you. Changing your plan is not the end of the world, even if it feels like it at the moment.

When your plans go awry, you have no idea what to do about it. That is mostly because you spend all 12 years of your grade school education preparing for your college years. By junior and senior year of high school, you are expected to have your college years planned out to the T. You are supposed to know exactly what you want to do and where you want to end up. We're told to get our lives together, to form a plan and stick to it. Wavering from your plan last minute is seen as risky, maybe even irresponsible, but what if your plan ends up being the wrong one for you?

My plan was to be a business major, and I stuck with that plan from my junior year in high school until the spring semester. One month into 2016 and I knew that being a business major was not right for me. I spent so much time working towards a plan I made at 17 just to discover that I was wrong. I was told for so long to keep with my plan, yet here I was, in my second semester of freshman year, not as interested in being a business major as I thought I would be. But what was I supposed to do about it? No one told me how to handle a change in my college plans, so I had to figure it out.

And figure it out, I did. I ended up changing my major to sociology and adding a minor in gender studies, things I am very passionate about. My current plan is to work towards getting my sociology degree and find a career with an advocacy group, but who's to say I'll stay here? Personally, I hope I keep to this path, but the universe certainly has a sense of humor and I know things can change at any second. The point is, at this juncture of my life, I have no idea where I am going, and I'm okay with that because I know I'll find it when it's time.

It's okay not to know where you're going just yet. Plans change, you form new ideas all the time, and that's fine. Don't feel pressured to have your entire life planned out in your freshman year of college. Don't expect your plan to stay the exact same forever. All you have to do is follow your passions. You will find out where you're going, where you're meant to be, and you will get there. And when you do, the struggles you faced won't seem so bad in hindsight.

Cover Image Credit: Lovely Indeed

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To The Girl Struggling With Her Body Image

It's not about the size of your jeans, but the size of your heart, soul, and spirit.


To the girl struggling with her body image,

You are more than the number on the scale. You are more than the number on your jeans and dresses. You are way more than the number of pounds you've gained or lost in whatever amount of time.

Weight is defined as the quantity of matter contained by a body or object. Weight does not define your self-worth, ambition or potential.

So many girls strive for validation through the various numbers associated with body image and it's really so sad seeing such beautiful, incredible women become discouraged over a few numbers that don't measure anything of true significance.

Yes, it is important to live a healthy lifestyle. Yes, it is important to take care of yourself. However, taking care of yourself includes your mental health as well. Neglecting either your mental or physical health will inflict problems on the other. It's very easy to get caught up in the idea that you're too heavy or too thin, which results in you possibly mistreating your body in some way.

Your body is your special, beautiful temple. It harbors all of your thoughts, feelings, characteristics, and ideas. Without it, you wouldn't be you. If you so wish to change it in a healthy way, then, by all means, go ahead. With that being said, don't make changes to impress or please someone else. You are the only person who is in charge of your body. No one else has the right to tell you whether or not your body is good enough. If you don't satisfy their standards, then you don't need that sort of negative influence in your life. That sort of manipulation and control is extremely unhealthy in its own regard.

Do not hold back on things you love or want to do because of how you interpret your body. You are enough. You are more than enough. You are more than your exterior. You are your inner being, your spirit. A smile and confidence are the most beautiful things you can wear.

It's not about the size of your jeans. It's about the size of your mind and heart. Embrace your body, observe and adore every curve, bone and stretch mark. Wear what makes you feel happy and comfortable in your own skin. Do your hair and makeup (or don't do either) to your heart's desire. Wear the crop top you've been eyeing up in that store window. Want a bikini body? Put a bikini on your body, simple.

So, as hard as it may seem sometimes, understand that the number on the scale doesn't measure the amount or significance of your contributions to this world. Just because that dress doesn't fit you like you had hoped doesn't mean that you're any less of a person.

Love your body, and your body will love you right back.

Cover Image Credit: Lauren Margliotti

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An ode to the little girl raised to be insecure.


They raise little girls to be insecure

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Her soul feels worn

The big girl learns to grow hard

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Hoping that one day

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